“Look I shot the man, Reg Bufino, in the chest three times. He died before he even hit the ground. I’m sorry.” Al sat trying not to look annoyed in the supposedly comfortable chair of the department shrink office. She knew the chair was a tool of torture for all of them. They were designed to dwarf anything that was unlucky enough to be set on it and Al who stood at five foot seven was especially easy to dwarf. She had sat on the edge of the moss green chair at the beginning of the session hoping that she would not last enough to warm the moss green contraption. She was now sprawled on it, her butt cramping from having been stuffed into the chair for so long. The shrink, Charisse Cagat, had told her to be comfortable and she was following that to the letter. If she had to stay an hour and a half for this stupid psychiatric evaluation then she would at least be comfortable. “Ahh.. the human life is sacred and it wasn’t easy to kill the man. I’ll go to church and pray for his soul every Sunday for three weeks—” she stopped when the shrink just lowered her glasses and looked at her atop of them.

“We both know you’re not sorry.” Charisse said dryly. “And I bet you haven’t stepped inside a church in a very long time. Come on Drusilla, tell me what you really think.”

Al flinched automatically at the use of her full name. God she loved her parents but they played a good one on her with that name. It was a product of hippie parents... or formerly hippie ones. She still wondered how she survived high school with the name but she thanked the gods everyday that it wasn’t Sunshine Love or Butterfly or Moonlight or something equally sissy. She was just glad that Al stuck despite the blonde hair and blue eyes combination her father and mother gifted her with.

“Drusilla?” the shrink called again.

Al looked at the woman across her and sighed in defeat. She had been lying her ass off, trying to get the session over with but the woman seemed too shrewd to swallow half the bull she’d been trying to feed her. “Fine. I’m glad he’s dead. The bastard killed kids to get his f*cking rocks off, if I had to do it again I would. Happily. Or more since I got to kill him twice. What I did to him was nothing compared to what I really wanted to do.”

Al knew her anger was getting better of her but her frustration over the whole situation was somehow overwhelming. She had shot the man thrice when he was struck by the brilliant idea that if he attacked her with the butcher knife he held he could somehow escape. She would have loved to grapple with the man and break some serious bones but she didn’t want to risk it... and a child was locked inside his closet or basement somewhere, probably suffocating already. What was the big f*cking deal? He was a bad child raping scum guy, he refused to surrender. He attacked her. She shot him. End of story. He deserved it. The department should be throwing a f*cking party in her honor. Instead they send her to this f*cking psych evaluation.

“What did you want to do?”

Al groaned. Smart move. She had painted herself into the corner with that one. “I wanted to beat him up! I wanted the other badass prisoners to have a go at him. Something really painful.” She answered. “Look, seriously I understand that killing is not something easy to do but I’d rather go to sleep with his death on my conscience, somehow, than with the idea that another Helera is harassed somewhere.”
“You curse too much Drusilla, do you ask yourself why?”

Al’s brows furrowed at the question. “It’s the easiest way to vent frustration? Is there a psychological law against it?”

The shrink smiled and shook her head. “You’re too wound up, loosen up a little.”

Al frowned at that and looked at herself. She was sprawled on a chair and she needed to loosen up? She would have asked something else but the bell that signaled the end of the session rang.

She stood up immediately. “You’re not gonna recommend any sort of leave are you? Or transfer?”

“We’ll see... I notice your aversion to your name, do you know that—”

“Oh!” Al gestured at the watch on her left arm. “Look at the time, I need to meet my partner for a... very important meet. See you around shrink. Thanks.” She smiled, waved and run out of the room so fast she was sure her shoes had carpet burns on them.

She turned a corner and found her partner leaning nonchalantly against the wall, giving her a rather... pitying look? He handed her her fourth cup of coffee for the day before patting her back. “You’re always welcome to cry on my shoulder alright Radwell?”

“Up yours Karmody.” She elbowed him hard and walked ahead of him, leaving him chuckling after her.

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...some people are only alive because it is illegal to kill them...