Jacob's teeth gritted as he felt a hand touch his shaking shoulder blades. "Who the hell are you?" He asked, refusing to turn around. Why did everyone want to touch him and ask what's wrong? Could he just not deal with his dad's death by himself? Sure it's been a month since he was smashed into a pulp because his drunk friend, possibly high, caused him to wreck their car on the interstate. But he still had a right to mourn! Now who the hell was touching him anyway? More importantly, were they prepared for him?
"It's Harley dude, why are you hiding behind the stairs?"
The boy was arguably Jacob's best friend, but they hadn't spoken in awhile. Jacob silently cursed himself, his friend didn't need to see him with tears and snot running down his face.
"Get away Har, not... Just, not right now ok?"
"No, right now you heathen'"
Another hand touched his shoulders and Jacob just wanted to punch him. Harley squatted down next to his friend who had been curled into the fetal position behind a set of stairs, out of sight and out of mind. "We haven't talked in awhile bro, you're scaring me," he confessed, trying not to look to long at Jacobs shivering form. "I just need to make sure you still know me."
"I know you idiot, now get away."
"No."
Jacob's fist clenched and he stopped himself from turning around. "I said get away Harley, I don't need you right now. Just back off okay? You can't help me." Almost immediately he felt like he spit poison, but he didn't care, it had to be said, Harley and his messianic complex could just back off and roll around in someone else's crap.
"No, I can't help, no, you don't need me, no, I'm not leaving."
His hands slipped around Jacob's torso and met each other across his chest and slid past each other in a hug. Jacob retorted and tried to pull away but Harley was to strong. "Get off of me!" He screamed, thrashing with rivers of mourning spilling from his face. "Harley, get off of me!" He yelled, thrashing as Harley simply held there, the only thing Jacob accomplished was getting Harley to land on his rear since he had been squatting.
"I'm not gonna let you go Jake, I'm never letting you go."
He spoke with a wavering quality of someone getting ready to cry. His voice was cracking too. His face was torn in two by a grimace, and his eyes misted where his friend couldn't see. "I told you I'd always be there, and I'm not gonna let you shrug me off because you think you can take care of yourself. News flash Jacob, you're not fooling anyone, your just not that strong." He spoke, his words stinging like a whip lashing across a slave's back.
Jacob appeared as though he couldn't handle it, and just kinda broke down. He didn't respond to Harley, his voice just turned into a whine and a cough. He tensed tighter into his ball which only cause Harley's larger from to curl around his friend, his arms still holding tightly as if someone was trying to rip a piece of gold out of his grip.
"I just..." He started, only to be interrupted by a break in his voice and continued sobbing. He felt Harley lay his cheek onto the back of his neck and drop his arms to below Jacobs rib cage, giving his lungs some room to heave.
"Shut up and cry Jacob." He said, pulling on his friend until Jacob seemed to break in half as he uncurled himself and jus lay there like a rag-doll, his head having dropped back onto Harley's chest, whom of which let one of his arms loose so he could scratch his friends head like his momma had did with him when he cried over his grandmother. Jacob's curly black hair scrunched under his fingers as he used his hands like a comb. Feeling Jacob shiver at the action.
"I won't tell you to stop, though I think you should. I'm just gonna sit here and cry with my friend."
The line earned another crack in Jacob's noise. Jake turned around just a bit so Harley could see his face. It was red and irritated from the tears, his eyes where bloodshot, and he really needed a tissue. Harley took his arms and hugged Jacob's face into his chest, not really caring if the tears and snot ruined his shirt.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Har couldn't tell how long they'd been like this, but he was loving every second of it. Since 9 o' clock after they got to Jacob's house from the mall they had been laying in bed held up to each other. Jake's mom had went to bed early after having such a long day, and the two had always slept together. This time was turning out a bit different though. It had started when Jake's body shivered from head to toe when Har had breathed a bit to hard. It made Harley smile as he enjoyed getting Jake all rustled sometimes.
"Well then, what was that?" he asked, his voice low and smooth like melting chocolate, honestly made to sound mockingly seductive.
"Shut up Harley, it was a reflex."
"I know that. But it got me excited."
"Dude, you're not even gay"
"So?"
Jacob scowled. How could a friend so understanding early become so idiotic in a matter of hours? Wait, that's a stupid question, it was Harley for God's sake: when was he not sporadic? Whatever. Jake ignored him and only forced Harley to hold him tighter, and this to get himself warmer. Jake grunted in such a way Harley jumped at him again.
"Are you excited now?""WHAT, NO, WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?"
"A serious one."
"You -------, no you're not excitin' me."
"Pity."
"Would you stop it already?"
Harley scoffed at the proposition. He had plans all of a sudden, and he was going to follow through. His lips so gently brushed the back of Jacob's right ear and blew on it ever so softly, like silk. Jacob recoiled harshly and rolled away from his friend. His eyes were huge and dilated, a shocked expression on his face.
"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT."
"A kiss." Stated Harley, a placid look on his smug face.
"MAY I REMIND YOU THAT YOU ARE STRAIGHT."
"Yes you may. But I'm a little bent I think."
"What? No. Harley, shut up. You're confusing me."
Harley stuck out his tongue and pushed himself upward with his arms, and before Jacob could get away again he pinned down the boys shoulders and laid down his larger body, his torso much longer than Jacob's. Jacob looked back with wide eyes but he was shocked into silence as his larger friend brought his lips down to meet his with a passion akin to love but not love at the same time. It was different... innocent and intimate.
Hot air rushed into Harley's nostrils as he breathed in Jacob for his entirety. His best friend. Then he breathed out and let it drape Jacob's face. His eyes were closed so Harley couldn't see his friend's eyes close as well and his expression grow lucid. For a moment they were gone into each other, so far gone. The next moment Harley's hands found themselves fumbling around the buttons of Jake's shirt and open his friend like an orange as he attempted to get his lips away from Jacob several times before they finally left with a gasp.
Jacob wouldn't say anything, he could almost feel something from Harley burning through his lips. Harley, on the other hand, seemed to have a ton of words to say hat he could only get out by roaming. His lips kissed every bare strip of flesh from Jacob's adorable nose to the small layer of squishy flesh directly above the belly button. Every brush of lips to skin was filled with something strange, in the sense the feelings being given off were something so much more different than your normal romance.
Harley was addicted to his friend, every square inch. He touched his sides ever so lightly and ran his hands up to his shoulders, lips following the entire way. He breathed soft shards of heart into the air and gave Jacob a much of his own heart that he could give without it being detrimental to his emotional health. His shirt was soon shed by Jacob and the two let each other touch each other, with a strange sense that they didn't desire anything more than that feeling of a warm belly to a warm belly, a chest to a chest, hands and legs intertwined.
They fell asleep like that. Jacob ended up facing Harley when they held each other in bed this time, and Harley's chin rested on the top of Jake's head protectively. Their hearts knitted, they dreamed peacefully.
