I'm working on another Map of Spam because I feel like it. I plan on fleshing this one out fully with lore and stuff.
I need your help. If you could think of any possible names for the regions, countries, cities, oceans, seas, rivers, mountains, ect. I would be happy. It would also help if you would care to give me some ideas for the history or lore of Spam as if it was a fictional/fantasy setting (creation stories, gods, past events, rulers, wars, and so on.) So anything you guys are willing to say would be appreciated, and please be creative.
Or you can just ignore me or be dicks, fuck you I'm making this thing anyway.
Well, y'know something about me leaving a lot and whatever. Fuck, I don't know. I believe in you.
Neo Shinto for Mike.
He will be so pissed at me for posting this.
Contra is the goddess of bounty and life.
Mahz is the god of absence and death.
A whore den dedicated to me.
Sure, I have some ideas for locations that you may or may not have used in previous iterations. The names are generic and shitty because I'm bad at names.
Attention Whore Lake, right on the border between Spam and the Member's Lounge (or not, if you don't want to have neighboring lands included), the place where attention whores go fishing for compliments.
The Admin Forge, placed atop a high mountain, this where it is said the reclusive Mahz lives and crafts the legendary banhammers used by the mods.
Butthurt Basin, just because alliteration is fun and you might be able to mock some people by saying they reside here.
The Newfag Slums, a shanty town where all the people new to Spam stay until and unless they can work their way up in the world. Most people flee the horrible conditions and flee to other, more welcoming lands, or they die here without anyone really knowing or caring. Only a small fraction of those from the slums, the ambitious and determined, manage to survive and thrive elsewhere in the lands of Spam. Or, alternate idea...
The Xenophobe Range, a mountain range that separates the Newfag Slums from the rest of Spam. Vicious creatures live in these mountains, lurking and waiting for those foolish enough to attempt passage through the treacherous mountain passes, then jumping out and attempting to tear them to shreds. Only those with the wits to avoid such dangers or thick enough skin and enough determination to bull through them actually make it into Spam proper. Would work best with the land of Spam being a peninsula with only the one overland route, obviously.
Arrogance Tower, the largest structure in all of Spam, built by <insert Spam arrogant bastard of your choice> to be able to look down on all the lesser beings of Spam. Also very suspiciously phallic shaped, for obvious reasons.
Troll Bridge, a bridge out in the middle of nowhere, not actually bridging over anything, just a big arching bridge built on a flat plain. Some of the dumber trolls of the land live out there under the bridge and try their hardest to get attention and fuck with people, but it never seems to work out for them.
Bancatraz, the island prison where the ruthless Mod Squad throws anyone they don't like, then proceed to torture them for funsies. Also serves as their main headquarters, because the pitiful moans and crying of their victims provide that lovely homey atmosphere they so crave.
Definitely not my best creative work by any means, but fuck it, that's all I've got right now.
Sophi is goddess of Judgment and Battle
Guru is the god of wealth, debauchery and drinking
Lillian is the youngest goddess of secrecy and Wisdom
All three gods host an area and fight for the title of god/goddess of art, love, peace and nature every four years... They also get to own the golden palace for a time as Contra and Mahz's great assistant.
Rilla is Guru's grand champion, as is [another major old spammer here], both rule the western land and fight each other constantly for control. Guru is the only god who has two champions, both of which are rulers. His reasoning is mostly unknown though it can be assumed that he did this for entertainment and probably found done it as a joke since both champions war against each other instead of fight with each other.
Sora, grif and a few others come from the north and have brought with them a crusade against the old gods (mods and admins) and brought with them new gods of the great tentacle god of beauty and the all powerful Porcupine Mimes.
That's all I have for now...
Oh, lore idea: instead of mods/admins being gods, have the people practice ancestor worship. Have old core members of Spam that are no longer around be the gods they worship, including the permabanned ones who haven't been let back in. That could be more interesting than mod gods.
Instead of prison we force our criminals to participate in The Never Ending Race. Between laps the runners must scratch numbers into stone with their fingernails. And just when they've finally carved the required amount of numbers, they are given a new slab and told to start again.
Fun fact: some nobles participate in the race for sport and recognition.
Why not both and call it the great betrayal or some shit? Heck even destroy a good part of the map because of how fierce the battle was?
Originally Posted by Jorick