Hestrhlaupas Elding - Rider's Dawn OOC

[Jinxlynx]

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[Mercenary Lord]

I can't complain, much, I simply have trouble understanding your posts. I'm used to less run-on sentences, better grammar, and overall...cleaner posting.

Sorry if this comes across nasty, but I've never been very tactful. I think that you would be accepted if I could be assured that you would be able to type slightly...better in the IC, but I have no way of knowing this, so for now, I'll have to turn you down.

Sorry.

[Ellri]

Character Name:
Máttug (or Máttugr)

Age:
19 (137, of which 118 were spent in the egg)

Gender:
None of your business!

Race:
Dragon

Profession:
Wild Dragon

Rider's Name:
No rider

Color:
Browns and Greys

Special Characteristics:
Fairly large for its age. Curious about the ancient language. Willing to help riders learn. Decent flier.

Personality:
Stubborn. Independent. Proud. Curious. Competitive.
Máttugr is the epitome of a wild dragon. Only serves its own whims, and those of its kindred, when that proves suitable, yet (s)he is of intrigued by the fledgling riders and rarely stays away from them long. (s)he is extremely proud of them and wishes them to succeed. While nothing like Saphira in expertise, Máttugr is a good flier, making up for the lack of skill in persistent competitiveness. Like all wild dragons, Máttugr is hard to bend to the whims of anyone when (s)he has made up (his/her) mind.

Preferred weapon:
Claws, teeth, fire.

Appearance:
Máttugr is a brown-gray dragon, fond of hiding, especially in desert sands. Máttugr's scales are surprisingly dull-colored for a dragon, aiding in that challenge of hiding. There is no count of the number of brown and gray tones present in the scales, much like Saphira has all the tones of blue, only with grey and brown.
Compared to many, especially younger dragons, Máttugr is huge. At twelve years having reached a size more common for dragons around twenty years.

History:
Máttugr was not the first of the wild dragons to hatch in the new home, but was one of the first hatch after the first one. As such, independence and protectiveness of those not yet hatched became key interests for Máttugr. For some reason that is yet to be seen (s)he has not seen fit to inform the others of his/her gender. There are naturally theories abounding, but being extremely independent, Máttugr is not yet willing to reveal it. If any of the other wild dragons know, they choose not to reveal it.

Having spent over a century in the company of innumerable wise eldunarí, and actually having listened to them, Máttugr knows far more than is ever let on, and is counted as a wise teacher of younger dragons. Has a burning curiosity where the Ancient Language goes, exploring it eagerly and spreading its words and knowledge out among the young riders. Máttugr is a staunch defender of dragonkind, especially youngsters. Any young rider can be sure to count on (him/her) as a friend. Not above minor pranks, much to the annoyance of other elder dragons.

Private roosting ground somewhere in the nearby mountains, though just as often found buried in the sands of a nearby desert, claiming that sandbaths are very
good for the scales, something many other dragons agree upon, even if they do not like burying themselves in the sand for hours on end. Máttugr's claims that mudbaths are just as good are generally disbelieved. They generally are careful to watch out for suspicious bumps in the muddy riverbanks if they should land there, having been surprised by Máttugr there more than once. Some even claim the dirty-looking, dull color on Máttugr's scales come from these baths, despite evidence to the contrary.

-----------------------------------------------


NOTES:
Any confusing sentences are typically caused by the lack of defined gender. It would've been easier to write it out, but not quite as interesting a challenge.

If you accept it, please use this link, as we'll be transferring the character to that topic for later use and to keep better track of it:
http://www.roleplayerguild.com/showp...20&postcount=5

[ANate]

I very much like this dragon. Sathir will be visiting him a LOT.

[Mercenary Lord]

I see no problems with this Application.

ACCEPTED MEDAL GIVEN.

[Ellri]

don't be too sure its "him"... Only time will reveal whether that is correct...

I see no problems with this Application.

ACCEPTED MEDAL GIVEN.

Excellent...

[Mercenary Lord]

Although I may require a PM telling me what gender Mattug is.

Also, same problem as ANate. A fancy character in the name makes things difficult for me.

[Jinxlynx]

I can't complain, much, I simply have trouble understanding your posts. I'm used to less run-on sentences, better grammar, and overall...cleaner posting.

Sorry if this comes across nasty, but I've never been very tactful. I think that you would be accepted if I could be assured that you would be able to type slightly...better in the IC, but I have no way of knowing this, so for now, I'll have to turn you down.

Sorry.

WTF if wrong with my posts I can read them fine.

---------- Post added at 04:47 PM ---------- Previous post was at 04:45 PM ----------

In fact other people have been able to read them just fine with no trouble at all. The only problem part of my CS is the background but that can be fixed, I just didn't have a lot of time to work on it.

[Ellri]

sorry about that, the name has a meaning in old norse (or if you prefer, the ancient language), and that letter is there... to access it, at least on our keyboard, we press alt gr + [key beside backspace] then a.
We often use that letter and other letters with that accent in our character names, as it has a different pronunciation.

[Mercenary Lord]

@Jinx:

Don't get so upset...I was merely stating my point of view.

'Ha! Silly manlings and their swords I has claws and can kill it with fire.'

First one. One, dragons don't call humans manlings. Two, they don't speak like 'I has this', or I 'has' that. Three, men aren't 'it's'. Four, it just is sloppy, the sentence.


Next, the history. Again, these are just examples.
-
'Wordsong was born of the 200 dragon eggs, which were found in the Vault of Souls. She hatched during the building of Du Skulgrind, and has spent her youth with the new Riders. As a wild dragon, she she does not have a rider herself, but she has stayed with the Order to be a companion, to the both the dragons, and the riders, as well as to help teach the new dragons.
-
That's only the first paragraph, and everything underlined is something that I changed.

Basically, you have these massive run-on sentences, and they really hurt my head. A few grammatical errors are also there, but nothing as much as your ROS.