LET'S DO THIS*
What spammers typify what signs in the western & chinese zodiac?
Aries - Always up for an argument, good jokester and outgoing, but the dickishness gets old
Taurus - Down to earth but loves his/her creature comforts, good luck trying to make them do anything.
Gemini - Fun and good for conversation, but don't get too attached because they don't!
Cancer - Super sensitive, can be nice if they like you, but if they change their mind never expect more than 1 or 2 words again
Leo - Never take anything personally, let them have their big blowups and shrug it off. They're funloving and mean well (generally). The narcissism is an issue, however.
Virgo - Don't know much, but they're pretty critical and analytical I guess?
Libra - Conventional romantic, very polite and conversational, but if they have depth they won't let you see it.
Scorpio - Tends to suck at common courtesy and light easy going convo, plus they randomly are rude and hold grudges for absolutely obscure reasons. Cool if they've become civilized, trouble if they can't control their lashouts.
Sagittarius - Super fun and smart and cool to be around, but the more serious/attached you get, the faster they run away. Also can be super abrasive and indifferent. Only the toughest water signs can stick it out with these guys.
Capricorn - Don't know much, but they're also stubborn and down to earth. Someone else put more here.
Aquarius - Don't know a whole lot beyond that they're aloof and also very analytical.
Pisces - Mixed bag, but usually they're super sensitive and can be passive-aggressive. Fun for dreamy/head in the clouds stuff.
Not doing the chinese one coz fuck that!
Anyways, with that basic info, let's assign some spammers!
*Yes it's all bullshit but let's do it anyways