I really hate online applications

[Squee]

I'm looking for a new job or two and I really hate online applications. I would much rather just meet the manager face-to-face and ask if they are hiring. They say that online apps are non-discriminatory and I say false because they have those stupid assessments.

Ex:
I worked at Dollar Market for 8 months before I moved off to school. Talking to the managers, they said they would take me back in an instant when I came home and even offered me a management position. I'm like, "Alright, let's see how this goes and we'll talk about it then." May comes around (2012) and my old boss texts me and asks when I can come back in to work. I tell him that I can immediately. He responds with, "Good. Just fill out a new application since the head honcho's have made us start using the ones online. That way we have it on file and all your info is updated." Cool. No big deal.

I fill out the application and then there is the assessment. One question was (No joke)"
"Mary steals office supplies from the storage room and you witness this. Why did Mary do this?
1) She needs them at home and will bring them back.
2) She can't afford to buy them.
3) She didn't think they would go missing.
4) They were broken and she thought she could fix them."

How the fuck do you answer that? So, needless to say, I failed the damn assessment. I call the manager and he says, "Keep filling it out every few months. We need you as soon as we can get you." What does the head honcho send me in an email? "Oh, I'm sorry Caitlin. You're not suitable to work with us. Please never apply here again."

One of the questions needs to be:
"Why did Caitlin kill the head honcho's of DG?
1) She couldn't afford to hire someone to do it for her.
2) She didn't think anyone would miss them.
3) Their brains were broken and she thought she could fix them with a bullet.
4) She needed their bodies at home to feed the dog."






EDIT: Why am I ranting about this now? Because it's almost fucking February and I still can't send them a stupid application because it sends the same assessment. RAGTHSDEY HWESDFHCV N AWGDSCNV

[Whetfeather]

I understand your torment. Perhaps we can get together and sue them for such an assessment. >.>

[Squee]

Alright. Let's do that.

[TripMyHop]

I hate those online assessments. It's always such bullshit.

I fill out the application and then there is the assessment. One question was (No joke)"
"Mary steals office supplies from the storage room and you witness this. Why did Mary do this?
1) She needs them at home and will bring them back. - You'll let people take store merchandise, can't be relied upon to protect store interests.
2) She can't afford to buy them. - Same as above.
3) She didn't think they would go missing. - You support stealing, aren't trustworthy.
4) They were broken and she thought she could fix them." - Idk but probably still screws you over to answer this. Sounds like a non sequitor filler answer.

[Squee]

Pretty much.

I like the ones for fast food chains better. They are logical.



Someone gives you $30 for a $13.42 meal. How much change should you give them back?
or
Read the following paragraph and then answer the questions appropriately: Jack is Sue's older brother and he has a dog named Rod. He also has a younger sister named Eve, but she's only 2 years old. Jack is taller that Sue but Sue is taller than Eve. Who is Rod?

[TripMyHop]

Pretty much.

I like the ones for fast food chains better. They are logical.



Someone gives you $30 for a $13.42 meal. How much change should you give them back?
or
Read the following paragraph and then answer the questions appropriately: Jack is Sue's older brother and he has a dog named Rod. He also has a younger sister named Eve, but she's only 2 years old. Jack is taller that Sue but Sue is taller than Eve. Who is Rod?

Yeah the math shit is easy.

all those fucking judgmental call questions tho. It's 50,000 catch-22s.

[Esper]

I wouldn't call questions about stealing about a place that sells things to be illogical. Besides that clearly the guy is an idiot if he thinks he can judge people on a set of fixed questions. As with any tool the questions may or may not be used properly depending on who is using them. There is also a trick to those tests, which is to place yourself in the perspective of a potential reader whom you'd want to like you. Besides that it isn't your job as an applicant to be able to do the job, it is to convince whoever is hiring you that you have the tools to do so.

[Squee]

I wouldn't call questions about stealing about a place that sells things to be illogical. Besides that clearly the guy is an idiot if he thinks he can judge people on a set of fixed questions. As with any tool the questions may or may not be used properly depending on who is using them. There is also a trick to those tests, which is to place yourself in the perspective of a potential reader whom you'd want to like you. Besides that it isn't your job as an applicant to be able to do the job, it is to convince whoever is hiring you that you have the tools to do so.

That's true.

[NatsumeHack]

"Mary steals office supplies from the storage room and you witness this. Why did Mary do this?
1) Mr Crabs the option.
2) SHE A POOR BITCH!
3) The Stupid Answer.
4) The even stupider answer.
5)Needed the money for her pony addiction.

Ok fixed it for you squee.

[Jorick]

I wouldn't call questions about stealing about a place that sells things to be illogical. Besides that clearly the guy is an idiot if he thinks he can judge people on a set of fixed questions. As with any tool the questions may or may not be used properly depending on who is using them. There is also a trick to those tests, which is to place yourself in the perspective of a potential reader whom you'd want to like you. Besides that it isn't your job as an applicant to be able to do the job, it is to convince whoever is hiring you that you have the tools to do so.

Questions about stealing are perfectly fine, sure, but that question was completely broken. It wasn't "Mary took this thing and you saw her, what do you do? Talk to her directly, report it to person A, report it to person B, or nothing?" It was "Mary took this thing. Why did she do it?" That's a ridiculously stupid question that makes no sense.