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Thread: A joke I heard today

  1. #1
    Chibi Aztec is Best Aztec Elendra's Avatar
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    A joke I heard today

    There's this old poor dirt farm and family, and they live on this old poor dirt farm trying to raise... dirt. The only thing they had that was worth anything at all was this milk cow. It was a good milk cow, that made some high quality milk, and they'd take the milk and make butter and cheese and sell the rest for food at town. The only thing keeping them going was this milk cow.

    One day, the farmer woke up and he looked outside and he noticed that his milk cow was dead. So he didn't know what to do, and so he hanged himself in the barn.

    And then the mother woke up, and the milk cow's dead, the husband's dead, so she goes down to the river and throws herself upon the waters and drowns, before washing up on the shore.

    And then the son wakes up and he sees a dead milk cow, his dead dad, he goes down to the river and he sees his dead mom, and a leprechaun. A woman leprechaun.

    Now the woman leprechaun says, "Now hey you're having a rough day now are ya?" And the son said, "Sure I am."

    "I'll tell you what, I'll make a deal with ya. If you make love to me ten times in a row, without stopping, I'll bring everyone back to life, including the milk cow."

    The son said, "Well, I'm young, I'm virile, and you're a pretty woman. I think I'll have at it."

    So he tried and he couldn't make it, so she killed him dead.

    So the younger brother wakes up and he sees the milk cow's dead, his dad is hung, and down at the river he sees his mom and older brother dead, and a female leprechaun.

    The woman leprechaun says, "Now hey you're having a rough day now are ya?" And the brother said, "I should say so."

    "I'll tell you what. If you make love to me ten times in a row, without stopping, I'll bring everyone back to life, even the milk cow."

    He said, "I'll have a go," but he didn't make it so she killed him dead.

    Now the youngest brother woke up next, 17 year old he, and saw the dead milk cow, his father hanging dead in the barn, and his mom and older brothers dead upon the riverbank, and beside it all this attractive lady leprechaun.

    She says to him, "You having a rough day?" And he replies, "I guess so,"

    She speaks up again, "I'll tell you what. I'll bring everyone back to life, your whole family and your milk cow, if you make love to me ten times in a row."

    The boy thought for a moment and said, "Okay, but let me ask you this. What if I were to make love to you fifteen times in a row?"

    She laughed for a while and said, "Oh, well, if you could do that, I'd bring everyone back to life, including your milk cow, and in the place of your hovel I'll leave you a nice mansion."

    The boy countered again, "Okay, well what if I were to make love to you twenty times in a row?"

    She said, "Well, I'd bring everyone back to life, even the milk cow, give you that nice mansion, and enough gold for you all to live well until you all die of old age."

    He said, "Well that sounds pretty good, we can start in a minute, but first I have to ask you. If I make love to you twenty times in a row, without stopping... what's to prevent you from dying? The cow did."

  2. #2
    Huehuehue Beatrix's Avatar
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    Almost as bad as the horse porn.


    Done by Bela <3



  3. #3
    Forever a BBEG Hellis's Avatar
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    This bad of a joke should be a bannable offence.

    made by the ever charming and talented Lillian Thorne.

  4. #4
    I SWEAR TO GOD Rainaa's Avatar
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    Well that escalated quickly.
    ''Wow, I've never seen a talking mutt before. You know in a dog show, you'd definitely take first place.''




  5. #5
    GenghisKuro KuroTenshi's Avatar
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    uuuh









  6. #6
    I Just Won Tantrum Bingo ImANargleHunter's Avatar
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    Woah.
    ......
    Woah.

  7. #7
    Chibi Aztec is Best Aztec Elendra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rainaa View Post
    Well that escalated quickly.
    I like how well this applies to both the joke, and the thread in general.

  8. #8
    Heia Safari! The Australian's Avatar
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    Where was the punch-line?

    To gain all, we must risk all.


  9. #9
    I SWEAR TO GOD Rainaa's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Australian View Post
    Where was the punch-line?
    I think it was the final line, but I didn't understand it if it was.
    ''Wow, I've never seen a talking mutt before. You know in a dog show, you'd definitely take first place.''




  10. #10
    Chibi Aztec is Best Aztec Elendra's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Australian View Post
    Where was the punch-line?
    TL;DR

    Guy has sex with the cow so much it dies.

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