Critique my writing as well!

[NatsumeHack]

Beatrix sat on the folding chair as the teacher continued her lesson she had started before she came into class. Beatrix wasn't much for sitting down and listening, that made her a bit nervous, so she began to let her mind wounder, as she look over the people in the classroom, she would get to know as her classmates. One thing that bugged her has she looked was that her Duskull was missing. "Where did haunt wounder off to?" She thought to herself. Remembering how she met that Pokemon a few years back.

(please due note, I plan on explaining how she got the other two Pokemon as well, and that Beatrix has a strange way of remembering things. She tends to remember it, like it was a narrator is telling her what happen.
Hence why it's third person)

It was a day like many others, her parents had brought her along on a expedition, given her situation at the time, it was not the best idea. They could have easily mistaken her, for a wild Pokemon if she transformed, sure her eyes would tip them off...hopfully, but her parents...to put it lightly, wasn't the best for details at there first look...or second...or ever. If this was a game of DnD(Dungeons and Dragonites) they would have minus ten and all there spot check rolls. She kinda wounder why they even become Archaeology in the first place.

Aside from that little problem with her parents, they never really did watch keep a eye on her. Sure there was more then just the three of them there, but even then Beatrix had a way of sneaking off on her own, and well...we already know how that went when she was ten, and she fell into that room. Yeah it didn't end to well, for her at all. Now this time, was a bit different, her parents did tell her to not split from the rest of the group, which she didn't listen, and went off by her self deeper into the twisting pathways of the Ancient ruins.

As she walked further and further in, she got lost. This wasn't so bad, it could be far worst. She could easily trigger some kinda trap, and get chase by a giant boulder like in some movie. So if you are wounding how she finds her way out, this is what happens. She cried out for her parents, which got no response. The thought of her being lost in these ruins made her begin to cry. Until she felt something, or someone watching her. She Wiped her eyes, and looked around. She called out "Mom, dad is that you?" once she was not given a reply back.

She still felt like she was being watch, so she began to walk, hoping it would go away. She didn't walk that far, in her way was a dead end.She took a deep breath to try to clam herself down, it was not like she was in any danger, nothing has lived in the ruins for a long time. They were empty old dusty ruins, it could give even the bravest of explorers the creeps if they was adventurer alone inside. As she turned around to once again begin her journey to try to get out of the ruins, until she heard a sound. She froze up right on the spot, it was like she was a giant block of ice. As she slowly gain the courage to turn around, she came face to face with a floating skull, and she fell backwards as she screamed out in terror.


She hit the ground with a thump, her eyes were closed, not to look at the thing that scared her. To her surprise she heard a snickering, and she slowly opened her eyes. When she did she got a better look at what frighten her, it wasn't a floating skull at all, but a Duskull. "Whats the big Idea scaring me?" She said as she got up, and look very pissed. The Duskull just snickered, and began floating it's way down the hallway they was in. Beatrix Ran after it, following it every move until. It led her to her parents, who upon seeing her not only hugged her buy scolded her for running off. The Duskull the floated around Still snickering at her.

From then on, the Duskull has just followed her around where ever she went, Be it to the local mart, or at the current place she called home. It never missed a beat, and always loved pulling pranks on her. After some time Beatrix Gave it the name haunt, because of it's strange obsession with following her around, like it was haunting her. She had tried to get catch it in a Pokeball a few times, but it would always just phase pass a wall, or in a floor to dodge it.

Beatrix snapped out of her little day dream, she didn't realized that class was already over. She just sat there with a black stare for a few seconds. She heard the commotion going on outside the classroom in the hall, as she got up and went to see what was happening, Haunt popped out of the wall, scaring her again. It just snickered, and floated around her head. She got up, and dusted herself off, walking into the hall way. As people would would agreeing to help someone on something. "Ok...." Having no idea what she was getting into, she just followed the group, like Haunt would follow her.

As she went with the group to where ever they was headed. When they got there they all met some stranger. Beatrix couldn't put his finger on it, but the stranger seemed familiar in some way. It really bugged her, but she put it to the back of the mind, as the stranger threw up a bunch of Pokeballs. All different kinds of Pokemon came out, but the one that appeared to her was a Houndour, just something was off about it. She once again couldn't put her finger on what, but it really didn't matter, it really look ferocious, and ready to rip apart anything in it's way.

(Yeah this is from a causal pokemon RP I am in)

[SmexySpiral]

At first, I thought this was a Drabble Me entry, which would've been hilarious.

[NatsumeHack]

At first, I thought this was a Drabble Me entry, which would've been hilarious.

No no.

- - - Updated - - -

anyone?