Players No-one wants to play with!

[Mikodite]

Before I start, no I'm not naming specific guild members, that was flaming last I checked. I'm just going to mention types and tropes that are disruptive to plays.

Examples of good playing and good construction are highly contested, but it is pretty universal as to what is considered bad playing and bad construction. So, here are all the people you don't want to play with.

First of all, the obvious: no one wants to play with...

God

Sorry almighty but your just no fun to play with. There are quotes in the bible I can recite to state why your the ultimate kill-joy, but the focus of this article is on roleplaying, so I digress.

The thing is really simple: no one likes a person that is all powerful, all seeing, and all knowing. The DM sets up a dungeon full of monsters with an awesome prize inside to the players for overcoming the dungeon's various obstacles. Neither they, nor any other player, want someone to come in and go nuclear, destroying the dungeon and grabbing the price. They don't want someone with "1337 martial arts skills" going in and trashing all the monsters without breaking a sweat. No one want someone that can spring all the traps because they somehow "knew" where they were.

Basically, no one likes God because God will:

• metagame : knowing where everything is
• powerplay : being really powerful and taking everything out in your path
• god-mod : altering the environment or other players without consent
• force-hitting : forcing consequences on other players without consent

You see, we like playing with humans, you know, people with frailties that have to struggle their way out. Even Jesus knew this, for he didn't go all nuclear when the Romans got him.

Now, the rest of the tropes are humans to some degree, but their the ones we want to shoot.

Next up... No one wants to play with...

The Red Mage!

Excelsior! For anyone not familiar with 8-bit Theater, Red Mage is a member of the light-warriors who is obsessed with state boosting and becoming all powerful. He resorts to methods such as "ignoring" dice rolls to actually tampering with his character sheet to get a boost in one area.

One problem with Red Mage is that he will bend, break, and enforce any and all the rules that favour him, much to the dismay of the other players. I mean, it is suggested, as an example straight from the comic, that a Thief has a stat for lying, a state for pick-pocketing, a stat for lock-picking and so on. If you employed Red Mage's take on this, than the theif would have all his stats in pick-pocketing, after all, "when you lie to someone, your picking the pockets of truth, and when you pick a lock, your picking the pockets of the lock..." Oh, and if you're being transformed into a creature you have dice roll to see if it actually happens or that spell fails.

The other problem with Red Mage is that he is more concerned with making his character more powerful than he his about the other characters, or even the progression of the play's storyline. He wouldn't drop an inventory item unless the DM reminded him that his encumbrance rating is maxed, or waste mana casting healing on other characters. He would also only do things within the game that will only make him more powerful, and resort heavily on min-maxing, creating characters that are unrealistic and too powerful at the start.

Basically, no one likes Red Mage because Red Mage will:

• Cheat
• Min-max: the practice of minimize one "unimportant or worthless" stat to maximize an "important" one.
• "Remind" everyone of the rules that favour him while breaking or severely bending the rules that do.
• Act like a Munchkin: an immature player.

In the comics Red Mage at one point "lost his encylipedic knowledge of the handbooks" and his fellow party member, Black Mage, piped in "Who cares? It was a worthless skill anyways." This is the sentiment of many players who want to have fun, evolve a storyline and socialize, and NOT dominate and own everyone else.

Next on the docket: No one wants to play with...

Mary Sue

Its amazing how you are so pretty, so smart, so athletic, so charming, so attractive, so talented you are, and experienced you are... at the very start of the game too! What's wrong with you: you don't like garlic? You think people suck? Funny these things don't get in your way, considering how much of a social butterfly you are that "hates" people.

Two things are wrong with you: one is your boring! Seriously. There is not development, no struggle to watch, no ineptitudes to laugh at, and everything goes smoothly and to plan. You want nothing bad to happen to them and you want them to be as perfect as possible.

Another is your character not only is too perfect, but is also so unrealistic it makes us want to puke. Seriously, all the events in their bio, from being bitten by a vampire to flying to the moon to meet Queen Serenity is retardedly impossible, regardless of what the setting is. Also, Mary-Sue isn't human for she clearly has no understanding or grasp on human psychology, and characters don't act bitched-up if they had a traumatic background or really kindhearted despite their profession as a serial killer.

No one likes Mary-Sue because Mary-Sue will:

• Derail other players
• Act against their own character's established personality
• Play cliches and bland story archs
• Twink : loading your character with things you like over things you don't

You know, playing a human as accurately as possible is more rewarding and fun than playing a characture, or dolly. The other players will thank you for it, and hopefully you will try to be a reasonable character that isn't necessarily likable or nice, but is realistic.

[Macabre Angel]

I think, to me, the most annoying is the Mary Sue. Mostly because in my experience the GM usually just ignores them because they're not God Modding or cheating and are following the rules(I'm guessing that's the reason, anyway), so you're pretty much left to deal with them.

Edit: Oh, and great article by the way.

[vaftss2]

I got one more: The deserter. The guy who is all fired up for an RP, posts four times, then vanishes. Everyone does this once in a while, but I mean the one who does it for EVERY RP they play in.

[Dream of Purity]

Who could ever possibly forget the speed poster?

What's that, one of six people posted? I NEED TO REPLY! >:C

Nothing kills an rp faster than someone who doesn't give others a chance to state their character reactions... without reactions, there's no personality, no development. No RP.

(as a side note, I second Angel, Mary-Sues are so terrible! they drive me bonkers... Plus they make an rp less interesting, and they appear even in unexpected places... In superhero rp's, Vampire rps, everywhere. No one is safe...

HERE is a great way to ensure you don't play a Mary-sue, or the ever present brother, Gary-Stu.)

[Macabre Angel]

Oh yeah, speed posters. They're the second most annoying to me. I hate going for a nice walk after a post or, you know, going to BED just to come back and see eighteen thousand pages of RP because someone is a little impatient. It's WORSE when there's TWO of them.

Heh, I hate when everyone in an RP is going with the flow of the plot, things going nicely, then the Sue walks in and does something overly dramatic to catch every player's attention; mainly by fainting. Is it ever explained later why they fainted? Nope.

I do get annoyed when people post three or four times then vanish with no warning, no word or anything, then you see them posting like mad in other RPs. It's even more annoying when they put their character in a position where it stalls the RP completely. Even MORE annoying when you specifically state to WARN when you're going to vanish or something.

I hate when I try to put my character through a struggle, like break their leg or something, and the God Modder comes out of nowhere, even when their character was on the other side of the universe, and instantly heals my character's leg. I WANT them to suffer/struggle damn it! I have a habit of taking pleasure in the misery of my characters, so when someone comes along and magically heals them and makes it all better, it irks the hell out of me. So yeah, God Modders are annoying as hell.

Just not as annoying as speed posters and Sues.

[Chione]

Thank you for posting this.

Frankly, I kind of take a delight in putting my characters up against adversity they can never overcome, giving them severe personal problems, etc. but I can definitely understand where those people are coming from.

Hell, I used to do stuff like that myself until I realized just how annoying it was.

The overly-helpful godmodders are the ones I really dislike. I want my character to SUFFER, darnit.
It's fun.

[Deviant Dolly]

Honestly, if someone can rp a "Mary Sue'" right (trust me there is a right way to create such a character), then their character can be fun if they also include that "Mary Sue" learns and develops more as the rp goes on. Not everyone can play this role. Just my opinion.

The overly-helpful godmodders are the ones I really dislike. I want my character to SUFFER, darnit.
It's fun.

Ohhh...I so know someone like this...or well...use to. After a while I jest got really mean with him and chewed him out about it because he ruined something that I was doing to develop my character more. Eventually I told him I could no longer rp with him.

[Chione]

I usually just pretend the character went on his or her merry way and didn't butt in. Then tell the player not to interfere - it seems to work.

Yes, I agree with the idea of occasional 'good' Mary-sues. I once rp'ed seven Seraphim that were masterminding Heaven's side in the war of the Apocalypse.

Oh, and they didn't exist in time either - they literally dipped in and out of time as they pleased, constantly warring with the demons who did the same, and trying not to change the outcome of the future too badly.

Blatant godmoding. It was also, incidentally, quite awesome.

[Shinigami Kakashi]

I have to say that all of them are annoying, but I think what really annoys me the most is the Sues and Speed-Posters. In addition, I'm not sure if this counts as an addition grouping of people, but those who spend 2-3+ pages doing nothing but having a conversation seemingly OVERNIGHT!

[Macabre Angel]

The thing is, Mary Sues done right is kind of contradictory. Sues are characters that don't make much sense, and have everything right and convenient happen to them. They have an overly tragic past and react in totally unrealistic ways, and try to get away with things in that are just impossible in an RP.

There's a difference between a character that's extremely strong, or beautiful, or smart, or crafty, and a Sue. Sues don't make any sense, so there's really no 'right' way to RP them. At least, that's my take on it.

Heh, I'm reminded of a time when I was the GM of a zombie RP, and there was this force controlling the monsters. Well, I posted a character controlling a monster, but the other characters wouldn't know because this force was nowhere near them, so right after someone posts something like, "Say, I wonder if something is controlling the monsters!"

Yes, Mikodite, thanks for posting this. Maybe it will wake up those who are guilty of doing some of these things.