The best thing in the world is corn-based salsa. You don't know that because you've only seen something similar at Chipotle, but take my word for it.

Out of a store, I'll take medium picante. I've proven to myself that I can eat hotter shit if I want to -- but I'll save the heat for the buffalo wings, thanks. Chips should be sweet and tangy, with a *little* burn -- not much.

Other dips are cool too, but not with tortilla chips (gtfo nachos, unless you're gonna make me cook my own beef and mix you with Rotel, but at that point why am I still calling it a chip, it's a casserole). Ruffles+FrenchOnion=delishballs. Spinach-artichoke is thick enough to break most chips, but if your chip is mighty and your dip is true, then destiny is within your grasp.

Straight out of the bag, I haven't found an equal for the Dorito yet. I *guess* Pringles are better on a sandwich -- they'll always have that.