I've had painful testies once of twice.
Was it serious testicular torsion? Who knows. I ignored it and then it went away.
Am I even fertile anymore? No clue.
We'll just have to see what the future holds.
What it holds for my balls.
How the future holds my balls.
Nine hours, no permanent damage, no joke.
"Dad, my balls hurt like fucking shit!"
::Hit in the skull with a sledge hammer::
"Go away, you're stupid son. I need another drink".
Horror stories that have happened to me? Lacking.
But [this shit](https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=ichthyosis&espv=2&biw=1366&bih=705&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ei=XCzDVLrLNZT3au7igrAH&ved=0CAYQ_AUoAQ) is truly fucking terrifying and gross and ohfowhfwodhqlifpw D: