[quote=@Apokalipse]
<Snipped quote by Lullyn>

Both of your characters personalities are bland and one-dimensional, not thoroughly expanded. Also, the part where Aeron is named a “magical” name should be removed, as well. The whole mythology thing is not so much as a wizarding thing, but just an unspoken theme of J.K. Rowling. Hermione Granger, despite being a muggleborn, has a mythology name. I have my reserves with the whole mother-was-abused thing. If you are able to write it realistically and accurately, then it is allowed, but if you over-do it then I rather you not. And Artemis’s biography also needs to be more expanded on. Also, just for aesthetics, can you remove the things I have placed in parentheses, indent the listing in the electives and clubs on both, as well as fill out the second name section for Aeron and make the biography gray instead of white since it is easier on the eyes. Thanks!

[/quote]

Sorry, Art should have been "under construction"
I'll take your notes and review. I normally find it easier to expand once I start playing, but I'll do my best. 

I've done some work, so if you can look now and see if this is better? I'd rather get it right now. ^_^