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[h3][color=f7941d]~Graham Turner~[/color][/h3]

[color=sandybrown]"I hear ye loud and clear, mate. But get ready, we've got a roommate coming."[/color]

AH! Scorpio made it up the Stairs of Doom. Did he too lose a part of himself as he climbed the Dreaded Tower?  Graham could sympathize. At the moment he could feel a small part of himself screaming in the ether.

Graham lifted himself off the bed, pulling to a sitting position. His vision was a bit blurry. And that headache...yeah, he wasn’t feeling that great now that he thought about it. He had to find out where that infirmary was. Soon.

The little guy brushed back his hair with his hand before rubbing his temples with his thumb and middle and ring fingers. BEGONE YON AILMENT! BEGONE LEST WAR BE DECLARED!

He turned to look at Scorpio. So they had another roommate, eh? That was cool. The Irish gu-

WHOAWAITNOWHATTHEACTUALFUCKINGFUCKISTHISMO-

LION

LIONLIONLIONLIONLIONLIONLIONLIONLION

Is it move or don’t move?! MOVE OR DON’T MOVE?!

Graham froze, fear strangling him until he was sure he was only moments from the sweet, cold embrace of freeing death. Would he die from asphyxiation, lion mauling, or whatever surely fatal disease he might be suffering from? Ladies and gentlemen, guys and gals of all ages, step right up and place yer bets.

Wait. Scorpio. Scorpio was around, yeah? He had to be. Graham had specifically heard him. Maybe he could subdue the beast?

Too late.

He was gone.

Death unto Graham. Rest in pieces.

…

Or...not. Why wasn’t he dead? What, was he not GOOD enough to be devoured by a lion? Well fuck you too, pussycat. Graham could be a meal, too. Maybe not a big one, but even wild predators enjoy a good snack or appetizer every now and then, right?

The beast didn’t seem to be interested in turning him into Grahampatties. It didn’t seem to be that hostile eith-

Wait...Maybe he was horribly wrong, but lions didn’t normally have markings like that, right? Graham should know, too. He had watched the Lion King more times than he would like to admit as a child...and, uh, last week. Would Disney lie to him?

Don’t answer that.

Graham slowly drew in some breath. He needed it. Maybe he was mere moments from death anyway. Maybe he was just hallucinating. Either way, he wasn’t going to just sit back and accept it.

He would cry like a baby first. Well, that was the plan. He couldn’t actually bring tears forth. His defence mechanism had failed him.

[color=f7941d]“N-nice lion, good l-lion. Down boy. You don’t wanna eat me, I’m little. You devour me and you’re just going to be hungry again in an hour. And I’ve heard Grahams are terrible for your digestive system.”[/color]

Shit. Idiot.

[color=f7941d]“I think I passed some nice juicy antelope on the way over here. Big ol’ suckers. And slow. You could eat like, so many of them. I’ll make a deal: you don’t eat me, and I lead you to the all-you-can eat buffet?”[/color]

He was speaking rapidly but softly. His voice hurt like a motherfu-

[color=f7941d]“Easy boy. How about I give you something as a sign of good faith? Hey uh, Scorpio?”[/color]

He called out slightly louder, careful to not spook the kewl kat.

[color=f7941d]“Where’s that uh...new roommate? Please tell me he’s fat…”[/color]

Alright, so it’s not exactly the most heroic thing to do, but hey, survival of the fittest, right?

…

Don’t judge, man.

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