Crompter lied down as still as a dead man in the bed of the wagon. The ride was peaceful enough when he could get into a drunken slumber so deep as to be able to ignore the bumps in the road, or the small ones at least. The horse drawn wagon suddenly hit a rut where the road was not even and one side of the carriage leaned over, flipping the sleeping passenger over and slamming his head into the side.

Muttering a half dozen curses below his breath Crompter at last woke up. His head throbbed, the pounding pain the result of a hangover as much as it was from just slamming his head into the wooden side of the wagon. Grumbling, the miserable drunkard rubbed his eyes. The wagon's cloth cover was partially transparent and while it only let the faintest bit of sunlight through, that was enough to worsen his headache. It would not do; the pain and exhaustion were enough to almost make Crompter delirious. Fortunately, hangovers had a cure and that cure involved a wondrous form of medicine. The grouch reached for a wooden mug and then filled it from a nearby keg of grainy ale. After a few drafts he felt much better.

The young man that was the driver heard the thuds and low muttering coming from behind. After sleeping through the night and much of the morning his damned passenger seemed to have at last awakened. That was good; they were almost upon another hamlet and he hated having to rouse the cranky nobleman. "Aldwin," the driver cried out, "there's another village up ahead. You owe me more gold."

Searching for his coin purse for an embarrassingly long time, Crompter began to grow afraid that he had let it fall out of the wagon while he was in some state of torpor. Eventually he found the thing in his pocket, though. Scowling at how droll and pathetic his state of mind was, he emptied the leather pouch of its last few coins and then pushed aside the curtain. Squinting in the light, 'Aldwin' handed the driver his fare and then retreated into the shade of the wagon's inside to consult his map. "You'll go north at the next crossroads," Crompter curtly told the boy. Just as he had withheld his true name and disguised himself to avoid being recognized as a wizard, he had similarly been giving the boy direction as they went. Telling the driver to simply go to the Idolized Tower would blow his cover.

With that done the still dazed wizard settled back down in an attempt to go back to sleep. Some time later, just as he began to drift away, the wagon suddenly came lurched to a stop. Angrily Crompte's eyes shot up, and through the cloth curtains between him and the driver, he saw the silhouette of the boy's hands up. [i]His hands were off the reins.[/i] Just as he was about to shout a word or two at the incompetent fool, a loud voice sounded from the side of the road.

"That's it boy. Hands up and surrender your valuables, or you get an arrow to the throat," came a sneer.

Crompter considered the possibility that he was dreaming or hallucinating, but the voice was all too real and so were the footsteps from outside. Quietly, he pulled out his wand from its sheathe on his belt and opened the pouch next to it. As the robbers outside cautiously came closer, they took no note of the tiny wooden figurine that clattered out the back of the carriage. They did see the blast of light that followed it, and the massive orc that appeared where a moment ago there had only been a carved toy.

With a ferocious bellow the orc clutched its axe and charged. Crompter leaped out the back of the wagon just in time to see it maul the closest bandit. There was another one some distance away that held a bow. Suddenly ignoring both Crompter and the driver, that terrified villain loosed an arrow at the orc before running. The bestial warrior howled with pain upon being shot, but that did little save aggravate it. The fleeing archer stood no chance as an arc of light flew from the wizard's wand and struck the bandit's leg, turning it to stone and instantly immobilized it. Falling to the ground in a heat, he was quickly dispatched by the orc.

Suddenly, the green-skinned brute spun around and noticed the driver and Crompter for the first time. With a savage roar it charged, but the wizard was prepared. Cackling, he stumbled forward and shot a bolt of magic. Too drunk to aim, he missed. The orc was now almost upon him, but that only made things easier. The Drunkard smiled and merely Altered the gravity in front of him, reversing its pull and sending the warrior shooting skywards. A beam of light trailed from his wand to the flying orc, and suddenly the brute's green body was grey and made of stone. In any case, he fell like a stone and smashed upon hitting the ground. Crompter grimaced; that was a harder landing than he had intended. His magic had grown rusty over the years, and it looked like that was one more figurine that would need replacing.

The bewildered driver could only look at his passenger for a few moments, jaw wide open in disbelief. After a few painful moments of a stare that conveyed both awe and horror, he stammered, "Y-you're a wizard!"

Crompter spat. With a wave of his hand his disguise faded; the Alterations on his body and items gone, the impressive nobleman called Aldwin was now Crompter, a weathered old man. The luxurious silk robe turned into a filthy, rough-spun tunic. The golden letter opener in his hands revealed itself to be a wand, and the handsome yet indulgent face of an arrogant noble transformed into the visage of a wrinkled old man, complete with greying hair.

"Yes, I'm a [i]wizard[/i]," Crompter admitted. "I'm the Drunken fool of a wizard that was a 'permanent guest' for the last few months at the Wild Bear Inn, if you've heard of me. And my name isn't Aldwin." After a moment of pause and thought, he went on, "Now that you know who I am, I reckon that I may as well tell you that we're on our way to the Idealized Tower. No need to wake me asking for directions any more, eh?"

Once again Crompter spat. He walked to a small brook along the side of the road and filled his favorite mug with its dirty water. He swirled his finger through the water inside, and suddenly the liquid was his favorite mulled wine. He drank deeply, then stooped down to pick up a rock. He squeezed the thing in his hand, and when he released his grip it shone like the sun, transmuted into solid gold.

"For your troubles," Crompter said as he tossed it to the amazed driver. "But don't ask for more. You don't deserve it."

The boy's smile vanished in an instant, and Crompter returned to the wagon to try his luck at going to sleep once more. They still had a long journey ahead of them, and the wizard knew that there was no way he would make it in time to the Tower. That was of no concern, though; he couldn't truly be bothered to care much. He wasn't entirely sure why he bothered to make the trip anyways, though he admitted that it was good to do [i]something[/i]. The occasional trip like this was necessary to keep him alive.