There was a certain amount of giddiness within the Nordiere, a declaration of war, that's always fun. Even more so that it would be against the Gem, although the war would probably be over within a weak. Such pitiful fools, too weak to even properly defend themselves without the use tributes. The occupation should keep him entertained hopefully, executing and torturing the rebellious little ones in front of their family and friends was always fun but he always got complaint that he took too long before actually killing them so that in some cases he ended up killing a dead body.

Feeling a tug at his side, Edoric looked down at the little Gem who was pouting at his side. She looked adorable, like a little puppy who was forced to watched her mother get killed. Well, this case it would be more like watching her entire puppy litter get stomped on, but that's beyond the point. [i]I need to get those eyes out more often.[/i] Edoric thought to himself as he debated inside his head with the other voices, [i]They are so cute and innocent that I almost want to mount them on a wall. Almost. I guess a pair of eyes on my wall wouldn't be that great though. Not feng shui. [/i] Yet, the more he looked into her eyes, the more he seem to falter in his thoughts.

[quote]"Do it. You know you want to."
"Stop, look at her laddie, she's just a lost sheep!"
"Go to war little one, don't you forget what its like?"
"Patience young padawan, good war and loot will come when one wait long enough, yes?"
"Your investments and your business come first sire, great profits can come from war even if you don't fight."
"Just fuck her already and have a kid. Who actually gives a shit about Gems anyways?"
"Yeah, and if you go to war, you can get yourself some more pretty little jewels, how does that sound eh?"
"...and then you pre-heat the oven to 300 degrees and put the potato in as you prepare the cheese and chives..."
"Think about the children! Not that you actually cared about them, but still, think of the children!"
"GO OVER THERE AND BLOW SOMETHING UP. THAN GO RAPE SOME GEM AND BLOW HER UP TOO! BURN EVERYHTING MOTHERFUKCERSS!!!!!!!!"
"Would thou's mother approve of thy actions? I belivith not."
"Money mate... its all about the money... make enough off this war and buy yourself a nice piece of land and build yourself a castle on it. A new one with tapestry and curtains and fine art... just imagine it mate..."
"Whoa, whoa, whoa there brutha, ye forgtten something REALLLLY important here. Ya gotta break in yo wives man, what if they try to kill you or something like dat? What if they burn ya whole house down while ya gone? If you don't break in yo wives, that shit's just crazya ya know?!"[/quote]

After seeing the logic in all of the voices in his head (they were always the most logical, they were the voice from [i]his[/i] head after all), the decided that the last one had the greatest logic. He still hadn't insured his house from criminally insane arsonist Gems. If he could have them stay obedient, that's one less thing he could worry about. But than again, now that he was thinking about it... maybe he should try and become the best grillmaster to ever live. For that he would need to add more charcoal and preferably napalm. Not that he knew what the hell napalm was actually, he just heard it in a dream where a talking fish attempting to sodomize an especially heavy pot of soup gave him a lecture on the fine pottery and minty fresh mint.

[color=0072bc]"Unfortunately for you Sheepie,"[/color] Edoric looked down at Tali, putting on his best (sane) smile,[color=0072bc] "I am in no power to do such a thing. However, I can get some people out of this war, but I am going to have to have you do something for me later tonight as a [i]small[/i] exchange. That's a fair deal right? A tiny favor in exchange for a weaker Drakken army?"[/color]

Edoric already knew that much of those words where either twisted or hollow in his head, but of course the Gem wouldn't know. Lying was his natural born gift after all. He put a hand on Tali's head and rubbed it reassuringly before turning to Statue!Asta, still stoically staring off into space (or at the ass if the confused goat judging by what her eyes at settled on), and rubbed her head too. Walking forward and turning to face the two of them, he acted like a (somewhat) concerned parent, [color=0072bc]"Now you two be safe out there alright? Remember to not talk to strangers or fish. Fish do not talk and if they do I highly suggest to come find me so I can tell it to shut up. Don't forget to eat a little bit of everything and to eat some veggies too. Feel free to do whatever you like but meet me outside once the party is over. Look the carriage that has my family crest on a banner. Should you forget what it looks like, just look at each other's back, that's why I carved it there. Got it?"[/color]

Appearing behind them once more, he gave both of them a push into the hall, [color=0072bc]"Now than, go! Have fun! Meet new people and frineds! And don't drink too much!"[/color]

Watching his little girls go off into the crowd, Edoric almost wanted to shed a tear. Wiping away his sole tear of dramatic, gut-wrenching emotion, he himself dived into the party after shooing away the goat-carrying guard. Time to be the life of the party.