[@Eviledd1984] Alright then, as i promised, i am now here and ready to review your work: [hider] >"Maguro has a wild sort of personality always looking for a fight to test his skills in battle,With his wild [u]personality he is arrogant and but not full of himself even going as far in battle to taunt his foe either to anger them.During a battle he plays it cool cracking jokes and on the occasion making bad puns and when battling a foe he enjoys the moment of battle getting some sort of satisfaction out of being hurt or slashed by a blade.[/u] This is will definitively not go well when interacting with others in fights, honestly: you are most likely to be killed in battle if Maguro even does what you have stated. Taunting the opponent is good, but please don't crack jokes. Your Character doesn't not look the part really. Another note to play on is his masochistic side.....it's orginal, i'll give you that. But if you insist of having him feel pleasure every-time he is hit, build up the tension. But going back to the point, your Character pic doesn't look the part of a machinist. [hider][img]https://53rg10.files.wordpress.com/2010/10/mm_01-00.jpg[/img] This is a perfect definition of a Machonist[/hider] >"He also has a dark sense of humor finding humor in death and the misery of others,He would often joke about the misfortune of others.Maguro is a nihilist only wanting to die in a glories scene of battle and or dying fighting a enemy he deems worthy,Maguro is also blood thirsty gaining adenine form fighting someone." Clash of personalities much? I have a Char who had the same type of view on death, exactly the same as you, except for the part of wanting to die on the battlefield, nothing much to say about this part really, i just find it weird that you would give him the view on death. I will let the other GM's have their say on this part. But right now i don't this is right for your Character. >"Maguro after being apart of [s]K.C.F[/s] KFC, he now wants to be redeemed doing whatever he can to be praised by his peers,But he still keeps a veil of his pain by cracking jokes" I'm sorry, i had to do that, it was right there. Aside from that. I'm all for more being noticed by sempai, but make sure your don't make it obvious. That's all for this section. >"During his time as a Chunin he was recruited by a [b][u]black op group called K.C.F[/u][/b] as a child solider this was when he was around eleven to thirteen years old,During his time with the K.C.F he went on many missions with his partner a young girl named Kima.On one particular mission became a disaster when the two were compromised leading to the death of [u][b]Kima and Maguro murdering more then ten Konohagakure ninjas in the process.[/b][/u] You will need to talk to the other GM's about your OC coming from a operation section, otherwise this is denied. You could always ask [@Savato] to see if you could have Maguro be dishonorably discharged from the 11th corps unit. But that doesn't matter since the mission he failed claimed 10+ leaf ninjas, and in your own word, goes back to the village where he killed to become a teacher? [hider]Boy....... [img]http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mamah4bliI1r5wdvfo1_500.png[/img][/hider] >"Because of his failure he was given punishment by torture and left K.C.F after being in the K.C.F jail for three months. Maguro left and now travels to Konohagkure to be the ninja his teacher wanted him to be." The reason being is that the [url=http://naruto.wikia.com/wiki/Bingo_Book]Bingo Book[/url] would have his info in it, and with his action would make him a 'Kill on sight', you would get a nice visit from 'The honeybadger' in the near future. His style of fighting and Jutsu, i have no quarries with them. The things i stated need to be sorted out, if you need help making him more presentable, you can always ask me, Partisan or Savato for help, heck i think you can ask anyone in this RP for help and they will help you. As Always, i am new to Gm'ing chars, this is my opinion and the other GM's will have different says about your work. Don't think of it as an attack, we are trying to make all Chars balance and easy to interact to. At least....i think so...[/hider]