[@Kingfisher] What an outlandish character. I love it. 

[@Pripovednik] and [@Lone Wanderer]; your characters are (so far) fine, but I have to ask you to clean up your writing. Both of you string together impossibly long sentences through the prolific abuse of commas -- and, aside from the length, often group sentences together that are unrelated, which is just shoddy writing. 

At risk of sounding pedantic and patronizing, I advise you to read your sheets as if you were speaking the sentences out loud. You'll find that you're not making the right pauses in the right places. 

Well, in my opinion, anyway.