[i]"OHHHHH GAAAAWWWWWD, RIIIIICK~"[/i]


An orange haze painted Rick's silhouette against the gas station behind him, his form flailing and shifting vigorously as he continued to apply pressure. His hands were shaking, not necessarily from anxiety, as somewhere through the gaping hole in the destroyed billboard at the end of the parking lot he could make out his car's refraculator hanging from a power line.

[b]"Dammit... H-Hold on Mr. Poopybutthole, things are gonna be fine."[/b]

Rick turned his attention back to the little yellow something-or-other and pressed his palm evenly to the left, trying to think through the voices screaming at him from the other end. Frantic glances from the blood on his hands to various pieces of debri and scrap metal that had fallen off his ship eventually resulting in a look of sordid determination as he happened upon a solution.

[i]"THHHIIIIINGS ARE GEEEETTING DARRRrRK RRRriiiIIICCCK~"[/i]

[b]"J-Just hold still and try not to *[i]BLUUurP[/i]* bleed so hard..."[/b]

Rick stood up, a panicked Mr. Poopybutthole beginning to shout awkwardly as Rick drunkenly stumbled back through the flames he had just escaped from and began digging around the trunk of the broken and burning space car. A few moments later he returned with a rifle and aimed it cavalierly at Mr. Poopybutthole's face, a few beeps and hums whirring into action as Rick began to adjust the safety. 

A look of concern crossed over the little yellow something as he tried to process what was happening.

[i]"SUUURREE IS A SHINY GUuUN RRIIICCCKK~, BUT I NEEEED A DOCcCTORr~"[/i]

[b]"I-It's okay Mr. Poopybutthole, I-I'm gonna take all your pain away..."[/b]

[i]"WAAAIIITTT RRRIII-"[/i]

An eerie and solemn burst of light would be seen through the scattered flames outside the gas station that night, Rick wandering off with an armful of various trinkets as darkness began to reclaim the night.



----- *Que the intro for all you imagineers out there* -----


Jerry sat alone at the dinner table, picking idly at something Beth had cooked 3 hours ago and not told him was ready. The rest of the family had already dispersed for the night, leaving Jerry alone with his thoughts. He was always alone with his thoughts. He sighed a lengthy sigh for the fifth time that night. No one had seen it the first four times, no one would see it now. He vaguely remembered thinking he had heard the door unlock, or that he had had heard the sound of footsteps, but none of those little warnings really seemed to register with him as he moped and poked a potato on his plate with his fork.

Someone stepped into the kitchen and opened the freezer.


[b]"You guys better not have moved my *Blu-rrrP* ionic defibrillator."[/b]

[i]"No Rick, everything's still in th-"[/i]

Jerry dropped his fork, eyes wide with terror and confusion as a pint of icecream and a box of frozen corn dogs fell to the floor, his dead father in law carelessly scraping various food products out of his freezer to make room for a frozen Mr. Poopybutthole who appeared, underneath his icy sheen, to be covered in blood and a look of intense fear. Jerry's eyes were locked on Rick, but every time his voice tried to come out it was hushed to a muffled whine as uncertainty took over and his anxiety immediately began to play out his worst fears. It wasn't until Rick had scooped up what had fallen to the floor and threw it directly into the garbage that Jerry found his voice.

[i]"HEY, I was going to eat that!"[/i]

[b]"I needed the space to save a life, Jerry. And by the looks of it you've had a bit too much ice cream this week anyway... I'll be in the garage..."[/b]


Jerry sat in the kitchen in silence, eyeing his own waist anxiously. He hadn't quite decided on whether or not to move yet...