So I got somebody to look at my computer, and it turns out it's less virus-riddled than I thought it was. Basically, I'm annoyed with myself for letting it sit for a week or so for no actual reason, and I'm still not entirely convinced that it's completely virus free, but the point is that multiple anti-virus programs say my computer's fine. Anyway, I made a post as Steve; it's not too long, because he's not actually left the room, but it is, at least, logical progress beyond "stare blankly for several minutes". So there's some responding for you, [@Hellis].