Alright, well I did not get any more hits through PMs or anything. And that's primarily was to force people's hands and get the lurkers to move if they wanted to. So @Wade Wilson@shivershiver@Atrexiel and anybody else I missed that was currently working on a sheet before the cut off and actively told me so, if you guys are still working on sheets feel free to throw them my way and if they are good I'm pretty sure I won't have any problems squeezing you in. I just threw up the scary notification to prevent this thing from super overloading and me having to reject like twenty people.
Anyway off to the reviews!
@Blue Demon
The concept is certainly interesting and I like it but I need some clarification on some things and other stuff.
Alright the first thing is about lasers, specifically laser weaponry. (I'm about to go on a rant about how regular lasers for the amount of money it takes to make them are incredibly boring. If you would not like to read the rant go to the second paragraph where I actually make suggestions and stuff pertaining to the RP and your character. xD) The thing is lasers are finicky even today where we have laser being built to explode artillery shells in midair and poke holes in plane fuselages to make them explode. Which sounds awesome using a little concentrated blast of heat to blow people up. But the problem is at further distances they become almost unusable as the lasers has to move through more air and water particles and everything else. Heat is also another problem because you need to build a consdierable large power source to be able to provide enough energy to generate a laser that can produce enough heat to burn through flesh and bone (a considerably large amount because humans are already surprisingly flame retardant and our defense only increase the more we are exposed to certain stimuli like extreme heat or cold, because we are awesome like that.) So you need lots of energy and some pretty big heat sinks because well lasers overheat and exploded. Which is why they are great to attach to vehicles and stationary objects but as personal firearms or integrated into cybernetics it just isn't that cost effected. Why spend 40 billion dollars and six years of research to make a laser arm when you can make a gun arm for half as much in half as many years? xD Bullets and F=MA still kills people just as well as lasers would and for much cheaper. So everybody in 2066 uses standard kinetic weaponry and some other more fun stuff. Which is why I don't think even a heavily outfitted Diver like Ace would wast their time with something like even trying to make a pure laser gun.
That being said, there are some cool alternatives in 2066 to boring normal lasers that I may suggest. You have an Electrolaser which could conceivably be built into her arm. Basically instead of trying to burn through a target (boring) it creates a Laser-induced plasma channel by firing a very hot laser into the air and ionize the air to make it into plasma. What this means is you fire a laser and a split second later your actually firing basically lighting at somebody. Now this is something with more practical applications in 2066 since a regular laser just burns through the target and would have to burn through reinforced plating and cybernetics and stuff. An electrolaser just hits the motherfucker with a shit ton of electricity and can be used to kill guys through you know shooting lighting at them and can also shorten out electronics and stuff. That being said the arm would probably be more of a one shot blast in that case because it's going to drain a lot of energy and be very, very hot for a period of time and if you tried to fire again you would probably mess up the focusing instruments and stuff. And the handgun gun could be something like a PEP (Pulsed energy projectile) which once again uses a laser pulse to create a small amount of exploding plasma to knock a guy off their feet and do excruciating amounts of nerve damage! But really I suppose the regular lasers are fine, but why have regular lasers when you can have super awesome lasers? Or at least that is my deal on things.
Secondly you mention that she does take Neurotop (Which she would have to since she is significantly cybered out) but doesn't have to take as much of it as some people. I also understand she's a CEO baby which means that she was probably genetiaclly altered when she was still a little ace fetus thing (creepy I know) and you said Mr and Mrs Alterman are going after her because she was a walking test of sorts. So I'm assuming they did something to her neurological system so that she is more "receptive to augmentations" than others to prevent her from snapping? Which I would be fine with because it's a story thread that I could maybe pull on the future you know.
The other point is that even if she has to take very little amounts of it, Neurotop is expensive like really really expensive. Like we are talking upwards of $5,000 per vial (like some drugs today like Soliris) and those vials will only last you a week at best if you are really trying to push it. It's expensive and it is because it acts as a economic control on the populace because only Corps can afford buying even small amounts of it. Let alone large amounts to fuel their crazy cyborg armies. So maybe you could add something like she stole some from her parents company before she fled or something but you know as the supplies have dwindled she has had to take more progressively suicidal missions to keep on making enough money to buy it on the street. You know just fluff out her story a little more help explain how she went from little adventurous daughter of some rich people to a Diver cyborg lady badass.
But besides that I like the idea and everything else looks great. If you could just respond to the questions and comments that would be great and then I'll be happy to accept her.
@Traitor
I really like how you fleshed out part of the world particularity Hong Kong with your character. And we can never have enough cocky, crazy types. Though I have some questions about her well tentacle arm thing of weirdness. More out of curiosity sake. Is the arm only limited in it's shape and form in how actually big it is? And the AI gradually as it goes through each situation remembers more and more modules to use in corresponding situation Or does it just come loaded with a bunch of presets like you had listed but that's it. It is confined to those presets? And since it is only sort of dependent on Gorgon's brain, if it were hypothetically chopped off could it move independently and if so is it programmed to seek out the user again?
Oh and the CDAPM "Polygon Coat" Protective Wear should probably go under Augmentations rather than weapons. Even though it is technically not an augmentation but a fancy coat based on the same technology. Unless she uses the hardened properties of the coat to murder people with the long forgotten art of coat fighting.
Oh and your currently missing the top part of the CS. The
part. But once you add that and answer my few questions, everything else looks good on my end. And I'll gladly accept you.
To everybody else:
It is one something in the morning her on the eastern coast of North America, so I'm going to go to bed for awhile. The IC post will be up sometime tomorrow probably in the afternoon or morning, since I have evening plans with the lady friend with it being valentines day and all. Thank you for all being patient in the selection process and all producing pretty awesome characters! Peace.
Anyway off to the reviews!
@Blue Demon
The concept is certainly interesting and I like it but I need some clarification on some things and other stuff.
Alright the first thing is about lasers, specifically laser weaponry. (I'm about to go on a rant about how regular lasers for the amount of money it takes to make them are incredibly boring. If you would not like to read the rant go to the second paragraph where I actually make suggestions and stuff pertaining to the RP and your character. xD) The thing is lasers are finicky even today where we have laser being built to explode artillery shells in midair and poke holes in plane fuselages to make them explode. Which sounds awesome using a little concentrated blast of heat to blow people up. But the problem is at further distances they become almost unusable as the lasers has to move through more air and water particles and everything else. Heat is also another problem because you need to build a consdierable large power source to be able to provide enough energy to generate a laser that can produce enough heat to burn through flesh and bone (a considerably large amount because humans are already surprisingly flame retardant and our defense only increase the more we are exposed to certain stimuli like extreme heat or cold, because we are awesome like that.) So you need lots of energy and some pretty big heat sinks because well lasers overheat and exploded. Which is why they are great to attach to vehicles and stationary objects but as personal firearms or integrated into cybernetics it just isn't that cost effected. Why spend 40 billion dollars and six years of research to make a laser arm when you can make a gun arm for half as much in half as many years? xD Bullets and F=MA still kills people just as well as lasers would and for much cheaper. So everybody in 2066 uses standard kinetic weaponry and some other more fun stuff. Which is why I don't think even a heavily outfitted Diver like Ace would wast their time with something like even trying to make a pure laser gun.
That being said, there are some cool alternatives in 2066 to boring normal lasers that I may suggest. You have an Electrolaser which could conceivably be built into her arm. Basically instead of trying to burn through a target (boring) it creates a Laser-induced plasma channel by firing a very hot laser into the air and ionize the air to make it into plasma. What this means is you fire a laser and a split second later your actually firing basically lighting at somebody. Now this is something with more practical applications in 2066 since a regular laser just burns through the target and would have to burn through reinforced plating and cybernetics and stuff. An electrolaser just hits the motherfucker with a shit ton of electricity and can be used to kill guys through you know shooting lighting at them and can also shorten out electronics and stuff. That being said the arm would probably be more of a one shot blast in that case because it's going to drain a lot of energy and be very, very hot for a period of time and if you tried to fire again you would probably mess up the focusing instruments and stuff. And the handgun gun could be something like a PEP (Pulsed energy projectile) which once again uses a laser pulse to create a small amount of exploding plasma to knock a guy off their feet and do excruciating amounts of nerve damage! But really I suppose the regular lasers are fine, but why have regular lasers when you can have super awesome lasers? Or at least that is my deal on things.
Secondly you mention that she does take Neurotop (Which she would have to since she is significantly cybered out) but doesn't have to take as much of it as some people. I also understand she's a CEO baby which means that she was probably genetiaclly altered when she was still a little ace fetus thing (creepy I know) and you said Mr and Mrs Alterman are going after her because she was a walking test of sorts. So I'm assuming they did something to her neurological system so that she is more "receptive to augmentations" than others to prevent her from snapping? Which I would be fine with because it's a story thread that I could maybe pull on the future you know.
The other point is that even if she has to take very little amounts of it, Neurotop is expensive like really really expensive. Like we are talking upwards of $5,000 per vial (like some drugs today like Soliris) and those vials will only last you a week at best if you are really trying to push it. It's expensive and it is because it acts as a economic control on the populace because only Corps can afford buying even small amounts of it. Let alone large amounts to fuel their crazy cyborg armies. So maybe you could add something like she stole some from her parents company before she fled or something but you know as the supplies have dwindled she has had to take more progressively suicidal missions to keep on making enough money to buy it on the street. You know just fluff out her story a little more help explain how she went from little adventurous daughter of some rich people to a Diver cyborg lady badass.
But besides that I like the idea and everything else looks great. If you could just respond to the questions and comments that would be great and then I'll be happy to accept her.
@Traitor
I really like how you fleshed out part of the world particularity Hong Kong with your character. And we can never have enough cocky, crazy types. Though I have some questions about her well tentacle arm thing of weirdness. More out of curiosity sake. Is the arm only limited in it's shape and form in how actually big it is? And the AI gradually as it goes through each situation remembers more and more modules to use in corresponding situation Or does it just come loaded with a bunch of presets like you had listed but that's it. It is confined to those presets? And since it is only sort of dependent on Gorgon's brain, if it were hypothetically chopped off could it move independently and if so is it programmed to seek out the user again?
Oh and the CDAPM "Polygon Coat" Protective Wear should probably go under Augmentations rather than weapons. Even though it is technically not an augmentation but a fancy coat based on the same technology. Unless she uses the hardened properties of the coat to murder people with the long forgotten art of coat fighting.
Oh and your currently missing the top part of the CS. The
[center]Character Reference if any to supplement your description.
Handle
Age | Date of Birth [i]In Year-Month-Day Format as set by ISO standards[/i] | Height. [/center]
part. But once you add that and answer my few questions, everything else looks good on my end. And I'll gladly accept you.
To everybody else:
It is one something in the morning her on the eastern coast of North America, so I'm going to go to bed for awhile. The IC post will be up sometime tomorrow probably in the afternoon or morning, since I have evening plans with the lady friend with it being valentines day and all. Thank you for all being patient in the selection process and all producing pretty awesome characters! Peace.
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