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Siya stood in the spot where she’d been and watched as Atticus strolled away and pulled himself up onto a stone. The moonlight washed over him, making the angles of his face more severe, more intimidating. Against the pale light of the moon the color of his crimson eyes made her shiver, not in fear, not only in fear at least. She drifted back through the small crowd, out of the circle of moonlight that made her pale flesh glow and into the shadows cast by the stones that she imagined she could still feel thrumming with a hint of the power they had been built to channel. Time wears almost everything down. 

It was a comfort and an irritant all at the same time to be in the shadows. Familiar but suddenly not enough and she found herself at war with herself. Wanting to step away from the cool stone all the while needing its shelter. She stayed where she was out of habit more than anything, watching, listening as the missions were given.

She ached to hear the words of Atticus, ached because of the hope that flared within her. Max, sweet, blundering unapologetic Max might come back to them. One tiny little hand flew to her mouth and covered her bow of a mouth to hold back the little sob that threatened to escape. She wanted Max back, for Veti but also for herself. She loved him in her own quiet way. It was nothing to Veti’s bright flame, but then she was nothing to Veti’s bright flame. 

Following Atticus’ announcement there was much discord as people spoke, dropping opinions and spouting intentions. It wasn’t surprising, getting so many supernatural, i.e. so many egos together always brought about much posturing. She watched it with half a mind as she considered her own choices. She should go with Veti, she knew that. She should go with her best, heart’s friend and do everything to get Max back. But she had watched her friend slowly fade, watched as she’d frayed about the edges and played at being alive. She knew that if this didn’t work Veti wasn’t coming back. Veti’s time had been numbered, Siya knew this though she could not prove it. She saw the raw hope in her friend’s eyes even from the distant shadows as perfect strangers offered their services. Yet she, Veti’s closest friend remained distant, her words held tight behind her teeth. 

Why was that? Why didn’t she move?

She couldn’t. She couldn’t watch Veti die and that’s what would happen if Veti didn’t succeed. Siya’s own tenuous grip on life had been strengthened by Veti and through her by Max. If not for them she would have been dead several times over, slipping fully into the shadows she favored until there was nothing left. But she hadn’t because of them and for that she was more grateful than words could ever say. All these long months she’d tried to be enough for Veti, tried to give her the strength she’d received from her friend. It wasn’t enough, she wasn’t enough. 

So maybe it was time to let go?

She bit her lip as her eyes filled with pink tinged tears. Could she do that? Could she let go? She didn’t want to but she knew that if Veti went down, there was every chance she’d go down with her if she were there. Veti had given her a life, one she wasn’t quite done with. She pulled her eyes from her bright friend and towards the crimson eyed man she worried she might literally be addicted to. She wasn’t enough for Veti and she had no illusions that she’d ever be enough for him, but it would be a new direction for her. Out of the shadows and into the light cast by a demon’s eyes. 

She took a step towards him and then paused, looking towards Veti who stood in her circle of strangers. She turned and with all the lithe unnatural speed her blood gave her she moved. Slipping between and past all the others like an unseen breeze until she was right in front of Veti, like she’d just appeared there. She looked up at her friend, her face wet with tears and suffused with sad love. 
 
“Veti.” She said, all her heartbreak cracking her voice. 

She slipped her pale, slender arms about the bright, vivid werewolf who towered over her and hugged her with all the considerable strength in her body. She knew Veti could take it and she knew this might be the last hug she ever gave the wonderful woman who had saved her but would not be saved in turn. 

“I love you Veti, but I can’t… I just… Can’t.”

She rested her cheek against her friend’s chest and felt the beating of Veti’s cracked heart. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t more, I’m sorry I couldn’t help you these last few months and that I can’t help you now. I’m just not strong enough. When you bring Max back tell him I love him and then you both disappear somewhere warm and don’t look back.” 

She stepped back, kissed her friend’s cheek, turned and vanished again moving too fast to follow until she appeared in front of Atticus. She stood before him, wiping softly at tears and trying to smile brightly up at him. 

“Reporting for duty, Sir,” she said in a tight voice thickened with loss and her dying accent.