[color=ed145b][b]NICO LEHMANN[/b][/color]

He drew a blank at Varus’s command.

[quote][color=ed1c24]“Show me that you belong here.”[/color][/quote]

Nico had never belonged anywhere. Was he supposed to belong here? How was he supposed to show what he wasn’t even sure of? How?!

The panic welling up from the darkest corners of his mind threatened to crush him. 

[color=ed145b][i]No. No. I don't want to.[/i][/color] 

Show. Show what.

[i][color=ed145b]I have nothing to show! I've never had anything to show my entire life![/color][/i]

His heart was hammering so hard he was having trouble breathing, every beat as terrifying as a death knell. 

[color=ed145b][i]I can't go home. I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't. I can't fail this. This is all I have.[/i][/color]

He turned to Alice, a blank look in his eyes, trying to figure out how to wake his powers. If he could just get it to work on someone, it'll be okay, right? If he could just make those fucking rings appear on someone, anyone, it'll be okay, right?

Nothing happened. He felt nothing. Nothing appeared on his left hand. Nothing appeared on Alice's right hand. Seemingly with something in mind, Alice struck off on her own, leaving Nico to his own devices.

[color=ed145b][i]Nononononononono.[/i][/color]

He was shaking. He could feel the trembling run down his back and towards his limbs as equal parts fear and panic tightened around him like a noose. Why wasn't it working? 

His right hand crushed the vermilion thread into his palm, the loose ends dangling from his fingers like strands of blood frozen in the fall. Why why why.

[quote][color=bc8dbf]"Don't worry, Nicobutt. If Four Winds doesn't work out, Lu and I will just get a million times more awesome for you. We'll always be your sunbros, so you'll never miss out on anything, I promise!"[/color][/quote]

The memory of his last conversation with Elliot before he had left for Four Winds scorched his panic into shame and despair. His brothers had always done their best to make up for him because they knew he wanted to be more. With every failure that had upset him, they had only worked harder to keep him happy despite himself. No matter what, they wanted him to always be proud of them, especially when he couldn't find it in him to be proud of himself.

And he was sure they knew. He was sure they knew he didn't put his honest effort into anything. He was sure they knew how selfish he was. How afraid he was to chase after anything that could be hard work because...

[i][color=ed145b]I don't want to fail.[/color][/i]

[i][color=ed145b]I'm afraid. I'm afraid of trying and failing.[/color][/i]

But he couldn't write this off as just another failure. There would be nothing left if he failed this. His brothers could never make up for this. But they would try until it broke them. He knew. he knew this.

If only Varus had shown up earlier when...

[i][color=ed145b]No. NONONONONONONONONONONO.[/color][/i]

A memory of a cat plush he had cut up with scissors as a child trickled into the forefront of his mind. It had been a gift from Elliot. And he had been so envious of his brother at the time; he had hated everything Elliot had and was going to have. And so he had cut up the toy, leaving only its vermilion collar intact. It had been a gift from Elliot. He knew. He knew this.

He knew this.

His body shaking now more than ever, Nico cast his eyes across the group, searching for the shock of orange rose hair. The only other person he had managed to use his powers on.

There.

He barely registered the people around Asswipe as he ran there. He had to show something. He had to show [i]something.[/i] 

[color=ed145b][i]DO SOMETHING.[/i][/color]

The rings flashed on his left hand and they flashed on Asswipe's right hand, thrumming with a feverish pitch of energy. 

Just then, a panther roared.

[@banjoanjo]