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Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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I'll look at CSs later and everything, guys. I just wanted to tell you all that I added some NPCs of the Guard that you may interact with if you want to. They are here: http://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/4035172
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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I just wanted to tell you all that I added some NPCs of the Guard that you may interact with if you want to. They are here: http://www.roleplayerguild.com/posts/4035172


Shame on you for not using a certain flavor of caramel.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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<Snipped quote by KoL>

Shame on you for not using a certain flavor of caramel.


Actually, I plan to, I just didn't do that yet.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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Actually, I plan to, I just didn't do that yet.


Shame on you for keeping the masses in suspense.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Mega Birb
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@KoL
Viola and Sagant are gonna have history, I can already tell.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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@KoL
Viola and Sagant are gonna have history, I can already tell.


Ho? That they are, I'm sure. Especially when the Guard are supposed to be recurring NPCs and even accessible as guests once in a while.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Themerlinhawk
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@KoLAre these guards human or elves? given their lack of ears
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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Unfortunately I'll have to back out of this for a number of reasons. Though I'll still keep an eye on this. Farewell for now.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Mega Birb
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Unfortunately I'll have to back out of this for a number of reasons. Though I'll still keep an eye on this. Farewell for now.

cri
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by TheWendil
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cri


I might join back but it would be with someone new. Depends.
Hidden 8 yrs ago 8 yrs ago Post by duskshine749
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duskshine749

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Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Themerlinhawk
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Guess we'll start with the volatile one.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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I'll update things here later, as soon as I'm off work, or really if I can get some time in a few hours.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Themerlinhawk
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@RoflsMazoy I'll respond when KoL has responded
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by duskshine749
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There we are, writing sample has been edited in
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by Mega Birb
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@duskshine749 Edgy.

@KoL He may have Eris beat.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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Ok, then, another set of reviews inbound.

@PentagonWhite: Accepted.

@duskshine749: Accepted as well. It would help me greatly if you placed you CS in a hider when you add it to the character tab.

@The1Rolling1Boy: Better, but not there yet with the writing style. Let me give you a couple more recommendations. 1st, remove those asterisks. You don't need them to indicate a narration/action on your text, as anything that's not between dual quotation marks, is automatically taken as narration in normal writing. Serious, that's the #01 problem, a vice that is confusing and useless. 2nd, add punctuation, you went through the whole paragraph without using a single period. How people are supposed to read that when they don't know when a sentence ends and the other begins? I hope this helps you figure what proper prose writing is.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by CelticSoldier
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Right, I've posted IC. I've not been very active around the OOC, so if you're surprised I'm here...surprise! Hopefully I'll be more active as we move away from CSing and into the story. Let's go!
Hidden 8 yrs ago 8 yrs ago Post by Themerlinhawk
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@KoLso I don't know if this is my fault for not making it more clear but Avi's face is hardly rugged ^^' infact the character sheet plainly refers to his face as "fine" I'm not normally a stickler for character appearance but it's kind of important that the character come off with atleast lyrics mildly deccent looks. This is all just for future reference.
Hidden 8 yrs ago Post by KoL
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KoL Knight of Lorelei

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@KoLso I don't know if this is my fault for not making it more clear but Avi's face is hardly rugged ^^' infact the character sheet plainly refers to his face as "fine" I'm not normally a stickler for character appearance but it's kind of important that the character come off with atleast lyrics mildly deccent looks. This is all just for future reference.


Sorry, I let the sailor archetype fool me for once. Either way, in Claudia's case you can consider it yandere-vision, hehehe.
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