[center][h1][b][color=DAF6C7]Riona[/color] [color=C4FDB2]&[/color] [color=9AF781]Leo[/color][/b][/h1][color=C4FDB2]part 1[/color][/center]
[color=C4FDB2]Time:[/color] [color=lightgray]Morning
[color=C4FDB2]Location:[/color] Guest House
[hr]

[url=https://i.imgur.com/VELo8i7.jpeg]Martin Barnaby[/url] held a perpetually stern expression. When his intense amber eyes landed on the group of tittering servants that gathered outside his lordship’s room, they fell silent and returned to work. [url=https://i.imgur.com/cFpW4Ad.jpeg]Ray[/url] followed behind him, frequently seen in the other man’s large shadow, lagging just a few paces behind the older man. Ray’s wiry frame was made smaller and unassuming by his proximity to the barrel-chested Martin. 

[color=D8BFD8]“Told ya, gotta see it to believe it. Gone awry.”[/color] Ray spoke, clearly amused by the situation. 

[color=696969]“Indeed.”[/color] Martin huffed out the word, unamused and annoyed. He brushed past the maid and lifted the chair Leo was stuck in without any sign of effort. [color=696969]“Pull him out.”[/color] He instructed his apprentice while holding the chair still. 

[color=9AF781]“Martin!”[/color] Leo exclaimed with relief as he was finally pulled free from the world’s worst chair. [color=9AF781]“Look at this! The maid messed up my room. That is the opposite of what maids should do, right?”[/color] 

[color=696969]“Correct, sir.”[/color] Martin said, eyes flickering to Riona. [color=696969]“Very childish.”[/color] He added even as Ray not so discreetly tried to hide a smirk by scratching at his face. [color=696969]“Raymond will see that it’s fixed.”[/color]

Ray’s smirk vanished as he gave Riona an annoyed look and mouthed, [color=D8BFD8][i]'thanks for the extra work.'[/i][/color]

Riona stared down Ray, her silent rebuke wiping the annoyance off his face. [color=DAF6C7][i]And being forced to redecorate because of the Lordling’s whim [b]isn’t extra work[/b]? Really, Ray? [b]Really?[/b][/i][/color] She wanted to scoff. This wasn’t even his own house.

Years of service helped keep Riona’s expression a mask of professional neutrality as she addressed Martin. Her spine straightened imperceptibly, chin lifting a fraction of an inch. [color=DAF6C7]“Lord Smithwood’s instructions were quite clear, sir,”[/color] she stated, her voice crisp and even. [color=DAF6C7]“He requested [i]immediate[/i] redecoration. No specifics were provided regarding color schemes or themes.”[/color] Her eyes slid to Sh*tfaced-lord, [color=DAF6C7]“Given the constraints of time and direction, I selected from a diverse array of options.”[/color] Oh, how she wished she could drop Shehzade Farim’s name into the mix, to watch the shock ripple across Lord Smithwood’s face. But the prince’s desire for plausible deniability was clear enough.

Instead, Riona allowed herself the tiniest of smiles. [color=DAF6C7]“I must say, milord seemed to find great amusement in the new decor. Your laughter was quite... enthusiastic. It gave the impression that Your Lordship has an appreciation for the unexpected?”[/color]

[color=9AF781]“It is amusing…”[/color] Leo commented, begrudgingly as he looked around at the collection of comically small, ugly, and impractical furniture. [color=9AF781]“But incorrect. [i]And it can’t stay like this.[/i]”[/color] He insisted. [color=9AF781]“I won’t stay in a room full of junk.”[/color]

[color=696969]“You knew better.”[/color] Martin’s statement was more of a detached fact than an accusation. Leo gestured to Martin and nodded his head, he and his bodyguard were always on the same page. 

[color=DAF6C7]“The tales of the Varian Kingdom’s love for every art form, led me astray, it seems,”[/color] she said. [color=DAF6C7]“In the future, perhaps His Lordship could deign to be more specific about his desires. It would save us all the tedium of guesswork.”[/color] Martin’s only response was a barely audible snort. 

The young lord brushed himself off and reached for the croissant he didn’t remember ordering. Martin cleared his throat and shook his head. Leo quickly sat the croissant back down. 

[color=9AF781]“And I'm not drunk!”[/color] Leo remembered the [url=https://www.roleplayerguild.com/topics/187747-roses-and-daggers/ic?page=78#post-5552202]accusation[/url] Riona had made when she’d first entered. [color=9AF781]“Don’t be ridiculous, it’s not even noon! I’m not Prince Callum.”[/color] The young lord chuckled at his own joke as Martin picked up and sniffed the empty coffee cup his lord had already finished. Although he caught no whiff of alcohol he eyed Riona with suspicion. 

Some of the servants outside the door shifted uncomfortably at the casual slander against Caesonia’s royalty. 

It was easy to ignore Martin, less so Sh*tlord. [color=DAF6C7]“Of course not, milord. I am sure it is merely the intoxicating effects of redecorating that have you in such high spirits this morning. Though your current state does bear a striking resemblance to His Highness’s ‘appreciation for interior design.’”[/color]

[color=9AF781]“No that’s not it.”[/color] Leo quickly dismissed Riona’s explanation. [color=9AF781]“It must be lingering effects from Count Landon’s gathering. I did drink there…and I bet that spa dehydrated me.”[/color] He fumbled his way around an explanation. He did feel intoxicated, but he was certain there hadn’t been alcohol in his coffee. 

[color=D8BFD8]“Sounds like a proper breakfast is in order. Maybe a feast, huh, moving furniture is hungry work.”[/color] Ray suggested with an outstretched hand. 

Leo moved a bag of coins from his pocket to Ray’s hand. [color=9AF781]“Coffee too.”[/color] Leo instructed.

[color=D8BFD8]“Can’t have breakfast without it!”[/color] He wasted no time sending a pair of the looky-loos who loitered in the doorway to pick up breakfast and coffee from someplace other than the palace.

Riona eyed the extra breakfast, her clasped hands tightening in front of her as she said, [color=DAF6C7]“If you intend to waste food, then perhaps it could be shared with those in need.”[/color] 

[color=D8BFD8]“Right, Riona, where we moving all this stuff too? And where’s the lord’s proper furniture?”[/color] He asked walking back into the room. He looked to Martin, who gave him a single nod, to gauge how well he was doing. 

[color=DAF6C7]“You mean the royal family’s proper furniture? The same furniture your lordship ordered us to move without asking if he was actually allowed to do it?”[/color] Riona didn’t say anything for a bit, just maintained direct eye contact with Ray before finally answering. Ray returned the look, unblinking as if this was a staring contest. [color=DAF6C7]“It’s in storage, of course.”[/color] She couldn’t give less of a damn where they took the new furniture, but since it technically wasn’t the guest house’s, the Smithwoods would have to deal with it themselves.

Ray kept staring waiting for the other half of his question to be answered. After a few beats, he realized he wasn’t getting an answer for where to take the unwanted furniture, so he turned to look at Leo. 

[color=9AF781]“What?!”[/color] Leo asked, once he realized Martin’s apprentice was looking at him. 

[color=D8BFD8]“Where you want all this moved to?”[/color] Ray asked, gesturing around the room. [color=D8BFD8]“Sir.”[/color] He added as an afterthought.

[color=9AF781]“Martin, why is he asking me this?”[/color] Leo asked as he searched the room for his belongings, which seemed to have disappeared alongside everything else familiar in the room.

[color=696969]“He’s still learning, milord. Raymond will fetch a horse and cart and get this all hulled down to the slums. Where junk belongs, eh.”[/color] Martin offered as Leo nodded in agreement. 

Considering what kind of stores she purchased the decor from, Riona tried not to smirk.

[color=696969]“We can even make sure the papers hear of your charitable spirit.”[/color] He added.

[color=DAF6C7]“Yes, the high-end, respectable stores these came from would appreciate knowing your opinion about their products.”[/color]

[color=9AF781]“Riona, the thoughts of merchants on what I do with their products after purchase, are not a concern of mine. It’s a fine idea, do that.”[/color] 
 
[color=DAF6C7]“...And the other nobles who make up most of their clientele.”[/color] She added quietly.

While Ray went to fetch a cart, Martin corralled any servants lingering outside Lord Smithwood’s door to help move all the furniture outside. Quick and efficient, by the time Ray returned all the furniture was neatly stacked outside waiting to be loaded up. A pair of servants were sent to hand out free furniture in the slums. Another was sent to ensure House Smithwood’s generosity got publicity; donating the results of a purchasing mishap to the destitute. 

Meanwhile, Riona and the servants, both from House Smithwood and the castle, placed their bets.
“Copper says it all ends up as firewood by tomorrow.”
“Pansy. Ten coppers.”
“Sod that, loser scrubs privies for a week.” This suggestion was met with groans and nervous laughter.
“No, no, no. Did you see the quality of the material? It’d be too much of a waste to just burn it all. Fifty copper says people’ll strip them for parts.”
“If it’s worth that much, I’d say it’ll all be pawned off by the end of the week. One full silver.”

A collective [i]ooh[/i] and [i]ahh[/i] erupted from the gathered staff and others quickly piled on to the wager before another bet was made.

“One free drink at any tavern of choice for a month, that someone will give the Smithwoods rubbish as a ‘thank you for leaving your crap in our neighborhood’ present. Anyone want in?”
“Depends,” the servant scratched his chin, “where were they gonna leave the ‘donation’ again?”
“The slums.” A handful of servants nodded knowingly and placed their wagers.
“Are they going to mention His Lordship’s name?”
The butler grinned, “You bet.” A lot more people joined in this time.

[hr]
The guest chamber sat empty, stripped bare, all furnishings gone save for the table and chair where Lordling Stuffypants was shoveling food into his face. Riona stood at attention nearby, bored out of her skull. The breakfast cart she’d wheeled up sulked in the corner and its contents grew colder by the minute.

Apparently she couldn’t be trusted to move so much as a footstool without supervision. So here she was, spending her morning doing her best impression of a statue while Smithwood chomped away, oblivious.

Riona wondered how long it would take His Lordlingship to notice the distinct lack of progress on the so-called “furniture rearrangement” he’d ordered.

Oh, his personal belongings had been hauled out by his own servants a while ago. But since then? Nothing. No one had returned, except for Sh*tlord’s bodyguards, and the room stayed barren. Only the rhythmic clink-scrape of fork against plate broke the silence.

[color=9AF781]“You know that’s creepy, right?[/color] Leo asked finishing a full plate of breakfast offerings, intentionally scraping fork against plate to see if it caused a reaction from Riona. He wondered how long she [i]could[/i] stand there like a creepy too real statue, without a single perceptible movement. He leaned back in the chair, finishing a third cup of coffee but feeling worse than when he’d started his meal. Still, he got up, unsteadily, and looked around the hallway for someone to remove his dishes and the table and chair from the room. 

[color=DAF6C7]“Milord has never complained before,”[/color] Riona answered flatly. Most people who employ servants almost always want them to blend into the background. She didn’t understand why this was bothering the Lordling now.

[color=9AF781]“Well, now it’s [i]creepy[/i].”[/color] He accused, looking down an empty hallway, annoyed at not seeing dutiful servants carrying furniture. [color=9AF781]“Where is everyone?”[/color] Leo asked stumbling back into the room. [color=9AF781]“It shouldn’t take this long.”[/color] He insisted, words beginning to slur together as he stared at Riona expectantly. Martin and Ray finished their own meals, having a quiet conversation on the other side of the room, occasionally glancing over as their lord bickered with Riona. 

Her eyes glanced at the window. Based on the light and activity outside, she guessed the time. [color=DAF6C7]“They are likely taking a break or back doing their usual duties,”[/color] Riona answered. 

[color=9AF781]“A break? When the job’s barely half-finished?”[/color] Leo rolled his eyes, this wasn’t how things were done in Stravy. [color=9AF781][i]Dad never had these problems. They’d all be scrambling to get everything done before he finished speaking.[/i][/color] His father had a voice like absolute authority, Leo had no such roar. 

[color=9AF781]“Well, go ahead.”[/color] He snapped at Riona. [color=9AF781]“Gloat about your meager victory. You’ve soured my day, I’ll be incredibly late to Lord Drake’s birthday, forced to deal with the issue you caused. Congratulations Riona, you are far more aggravating than an insect…untrained pet…beast of burden…whatever it was I called you that ruffled your feathers.”[/color] Leo paced, staggering about, as he spoke. Up and down the nearly empty room. 

He didn’t hear Riona’s [color=DAF6C7]“... I already told you what my problem is with you.”[/color]

Martin cleared his throat. [color=696969]“Sir, is it worth the risk? Showing up to the lord’s birthday this-”[/color] Martin paused for the right word.

[color=D8BFD8]“Wasted!”[/color] Ray offered.
[color=696969]“Inebriated.”[/color] Martin continued, as a look of deep annoyance crossed his face. 

[color=9AF781]“I’m not-”[/color] Leo stumbled and once he’d righted himself a look of concern flashed across his face. [color=9AF781]“I’m drunk.”[/color] He admitted, but he’d not had a drop since last night. [color=9AF781]“Pranked! Again! That solves it, Martin! The pranks are definitely happening in this guest house.”[/color] Leo excitedly shared the clue he’d found. 

[color=696969]“Most likely.”[/color] Martin agreed.

[color=9AF781]“And you’re sure Verrick left?”[/color] Leo asked. 

[color=D8BFD8]“I watched him leave with the Royals,”[/color] Ray confirmed. Leo only looked at Martin, who nodded. 

[color=9AF781]“That settles it. I forgo the birthday party, we’ll spend the morning figuring out suspects, detective work. Once the room gets fixed.”[/color] Leo continued to wait for servants who continued to remain unaware of their lord’s need for urgency. 

[color=DAF6C7]“If you intend to sit here all day, may I take my leave?”[/color] Because he was going to stay here all day if he waited for “this room to get fixed.” And even she couldn’t stand still for that long. She glanced at the breakfast cart and wondered if she should just eat that for lunch.

[color=9AF781]“Go ahead,”[/color] Leo gestured to the food cart that Riona kept eyeing, wondering why she seemed so concerned with an uneaten croissant when bigger problems were happening. [color=9AF781]“I am no longer eating anything prepared in the kitchens here.”[/color]

[color=DAF6C7]“I will inform the staff to never serve you food in this castle, or made from the castle kitchens, from this moment forward.”[/color] Riona walked over to the table. [color=DAF6C7]“Would you like to extend that request to drinks as well?”[/color]

[color=9AF781]“You will not! It’s a secret.”[/color] He insisted, he wasn’t risking insulting the crown like that. 

A small smile appeared on the maid’s face. [color=DAF6C7]“Understood, [i]drinks[/i] will be served as normal.”[/color]

Riona's reply went unheard as Leo did his best to ignore her input. [color=9AF781]“Now, we’re all going to the storage room and moving everything back.”[/color] Leo decided, it seemed that was the only way anything was getting done today. Leo didn’t wait for an answer, he headed out of the room and waited for someone to lead the way to the storage room. Ray headed past Smithwood, directing the lord toward the storage room. 

[color=9AF781]“Has my watch been found?”[/color] Leo asked.

[color=696969]“Not yet.”[/color] Martin said. 

Ray spun around and began walking backward as he spoke. [color=D8BFD8]“Right! Full report on the missing pocket watch. I canvassed the marketplace, shops on the up and up, sellers on the down low. Everything in between. No one’s tried to fence it, far as I can tell but, if anyone tries, we’ll know about it.”[/color] He turned back around. [color=D8BFD8]“Nothing on the thief. Hard to track someone down without a face or name.”[/color] Ray added. 

[color=9AF781]“So we have nothing.”[/color] Leo stopped walking as he spoke, disappointment heavy in his words. [color=9AF781]“He’d be so disappointed in me.”[/color] He continued walking, mumbling as he did so. [color=9AF781]“I wasn’t careful enough, I just let some common thief swipe it.”[/color] Leo cleared his throat. [color=9AF781]“We have to find that watch.”[/color]

Riona listened into the conversation thoughtfully as she cleared up the Lordling breakfast mess and loaded it up on the cart.

They reached the storage room and began the arduous process of moving all the original furniture back into Leo’s guest room. The small upside to the few wasted morning hours was that his original intent, of the furniture being moved around in a way he found more favorable, was finally realized. The effects of the alcohol he hadn't even consumed were ebbing as well. 

A servant emerged from the hallway and paused, clearly confused. “My lord? What are you doing with those furniture? They have not been properly refurbished yet. Did you not like the room we prepared for you?”

[color=9AF781]“Pardon?”[/color] Leo asked, confused. Of course, he didn’t like the empty room! He didn’t wait for the servant to repeat themselves. [color=9AF781]“I am being moved to a different room? Why wasn’t I told this?”[/color] He asked, then his attention flickered to Riona, who’d said nothing while they moved the wrong furniture, and was currently having her back turned to him as she swept the floor.

[color=696969]“A small misunderstanding.”[/color] Martin said, his hand clapping against the young lord’s shoulder. [color=696969]“A small pittance for a room upgrade.”[/color] His words drew the ire out of Leo’s tone. 

[color=9AF781]“That’s true…excellent then. A better room. This one is unlucky.”[/color] Leo quickly decided he was glad to leave the room where misfortune so often struck him. 

The look of confusion intensified on the servant. “I beg your pardon, my lord, but it’s exactly the same style of room you pre—” the servant began, but was immediately cut off.

Martin approached the servant, inquiring about the location of the new room and once that was settled dismissed them back to their duties. [color=696969]“We’ll get all this returned to storage, and if you need help restoring furniture, let me know.”[/color] Martin added before they left, sounding uncharacteristically chipper about fixing something more tangible than a lord’s minor inconveniences. 

[color=9AF781]“You,”[/color] Leo wagged a finger at Riona. [color=9AF781]“Surprising me with terrible furnishing only to have me switched to a better room.”[/color] Leo chuckled as he finally got the joke. [color=9AF781]“This is an improvement. A stepping stone toward being a better servant! Once the childish antics cease I’ll have passed Lady Morrigan’s bizarre test.[/color] He thought about that for a moment.

[color=9AF781]“Could Lady Morrigan be my prankster? She does have an odd obsession with testing me...”[/color] He thought aloud. 

The maid spun around—and it wasn’t Riona. Not even close. She cocked her head and seemed to give Leo’s question some serious thought. “I don’t believe so? I rarely hear her mention you, if at all.” Then she beamed at him and, with the energy of some delivering him great news, said, “She’s a very busy woman, so I doubt she’d waste time pranking Your Lordship.”

When the silence that followed stretched into awkwardness, the maid gasped, “Oh, did you need Riona? She’s having tea with your servants. If you will follow me, your lordship.” Without waiting for a response—or bothering to check if they were following—she marched out of the room, humming a jaunty tune.

The muffled sounds of laughter and animated conversation grew louder and clearer as they neared the guesthouse’s servant hall. Familiar voices drifted out into the hall as Smithwood servants let off steam.

[color=faa22a]“How long before he tasks one of us with getting his lion slippers groomed?”[/color] Ivan, Leo’s valet, said as the servants discussed some of their lord’s more absurd requests. 

A footmen snorted. [color=91c1fe]“Wouldn’t surprise me if the lad spent all his time in the woods pretending he was a lion.”[/color]   

[color=fc8efc]“Do you know how much his lordship spends on his hunting trips? On his mountain trips? Enough to feed a small village. And I ain’t seen a raise in years.”[/color] One of the Smithwood maids pointed out. 

[color=faa22a]“A raise? When you still struggle with the simplest tasks? Outlandish! Remember the time my drink had far too many ice cubes?”[/color] There was a marked smugness to his tone as Ivan impersonated Leo. 

[color=fc5452]“Noble’s have very delicate constitutions, Edith. An extra sliver of ice could send them into a chill.”[/color] Myrtle joked. 

[color=fc8efc]“How could I forget the time I attempted assassination by brain freeze, his lordship never fails to remind me. I bet he thinks my name is [i]too much ice[/i].”[/color] Edith said. 

[color=91c1fe]“No wonder he runs off so often, must be afraid of ya.”[/color] Abe joked.

[color=fc5452]“If I had Leo’s parents I'd be running off every chance I got too.”[/color] Myrtle said with a shrug. [color=fc5452]“I swear their arguments could be heard all through Stravy.”[/color] At the very least the carriagewoman had heard the pair from the stables more than a few times. 

[color=fc8efc]“Can’t say I miss cleaning up shattered dishes all night once the two o’ them were through.”[/color] 

[color=faa22a]“Except now, the whole city hears”[/color] Ivan cleared his throat and raised the pitch of his voice. [color=faa22a]“Who allowed Thea near the liquor? Who let Leo track mud through the pallor? Why must my children test me?”[/color] Ivan mimicked the Dutchess while dramatically gesturing around him.  

[color=91c1fe]]“Like we got extra time to nanny her grown children!”[/color] Abe added, rolling his eyes. 

[color=fc8efc]“What’s she expect when she’s raised them thinkin' no’s a foreign word?”[/color] Edith shook her head. 

[color=fc5452]“Didn’t seem to win her any favors, they both avoid her like the plague.”[/color] Myrtle pointed out. 

[color=fc8efc]“That I understand. Not even a year and remarried? Her children are a mess, you’d think she’d care a bit more about that.”[/color] 

[color=faa22a]“At least the Duke’s gone.”[/color] There was a hushed murmur of agreement. 

[color=91c1fe]“Surely the worst of ‘em.”[/color] Abe whispered the statement. All heads somberly nodded as they all grew quiet for a moment.  

[color=fc8efc]“You think the Dutchess had him-”[/color] She didn’t need to finish her sentance. 

[color=fc5452]“Good for her if she did. Probably the best thing she’s ever done. Ya know. If.”[/color] And then more silence. No one needed to say more on the subject but it was clear they all agreed on that too. 

[color=faa22a]“You should see the kennels, nicer digs than any of us got. The hounds eat better than most merchants.”[/color] Ivan pivoted back to something lighter, regretting bringing up the subject. 

[color=fc8efc]“Oh what I wouldn’t give to be turned into one of them hounds. Now that’s a cushy life.”[/color]

[color=91c1fe]“Pretty sure Lewis was fired ‘cause one of the hounds didn’t like him. Imagine, taking advice from a creature that licks its own ass.”[/color] 

[color=faa22a]“If you cannot earn the trust of my hounds, how can I expect you to earn my trust?”[/color] Ivan slipped back into his Leo impersonation with such ease that it was clear how often he practiced it. 

[color=fc5452]“Waiting for the day we all get meat scraps as a reward for a job well done.”[/color]

[color=faa22a]“That would require you to do a job well done and you are all more incompetent than a freshly weaned pup.”[/color]

[color=fc5452]“Joke’s on you, I was called an adequate carriage driver by the lad once.”[/color] Myrtle bragged. 

[color=91c1fe]“So, Riona, what’s it like working for Royal pricks? Any better than the standard variety?”[/color] Abe asked. [/color]

[hider=TLDR]Leo hates Riona's decorating choices, so with the help of his bodyguards (Martin and Ray) and some Smithwood servants, he has the unwanted furniture hulled off to the slums. As they move what they think is the original furniture back into the room they learn Leo's been moved to a different room, the furniture they moved belongs in storage for refurnishing, and Leo's daily misfortune has left him tipsy. Meanwhile, Riona enjoys a double helping of tea, both beverage and gossip, with Leo's unhappy servants.[/hider]