[quote=@Tortoise]
[@DX3214]

So, reading over this sheet, I can see what you're going for on the whole and I like the general concept. We're going very "warlord" this time around ;P 

But I do have some concerns. Your writing style in this sheet often lacks grammar or punctuation, and that makes it difficult to understand what you're saying. Especially during the more complicated bits, I can't really tell what you mean, and it's making me feel hesitant about approving you. 

Your worldbuilding itself is fine. You've kept to Gateways themes well. Having a mythological and a non-mythological history was really smart- it's the kind of thing I wish that I'd thought of. 

So I'm not rejecting your sheet, or asking for a rewrite. But still, it's difficult to read, so I think I need some assurance that you'll run your future posts through, for example, an internet grammar checker before posting IC. Something like Grammarly, maybe?

[/quote]

No problemo for me cumpadre

[quote]
I'm not fully sure what this means. Are you saying their sun has become unstable?
[/quote]

Ah yes, its just difficult to describe and i could not find the right words besides Anomolous. So put it in bigger words i guess, anyways a good way to describe the sheer monumentality that their star is wierd is well... Imagine the solar corona of the star being big enough to reach the orbit of mercury, while also being so intense that you can easily detect that 20% to 30% of the entire star's mass orbits around it still making fusion. How? well no one knows the people of Vusary thinks its the carcass of the second star but in practice it seems something is messing with the stars magnetism to do that. Seeing how there is debrii orbiting around the corona storms it has some credence, there is also solar eruption that can make ship crews duck or anchor because of how violent they can be;