[OOC] Fate/Stagnant Apotheosis

[Unoedipal]

@KoL
Give the conditions under which the Charisma minus is and is not considered. IE, Mordred can only exhibit her true Charisma during REBELLION.

Just having Circuits and a fire affinity won't give you a flame-affinity Prana Burst. Examples that we have of it are Karna who's whole shtick was "fire", Arjuna whose bow was given to him by Agni, and Bryn who had a sordid love affair with fire all around her on a pretty extensive basis on top of being a Valkyrie. You don't get buffed as a Servant outside of Class Skills, the Servant's just a nerfed copy of the Heroic Spirit, and the Heroic Spirit is you in your prime + historical distortion and legend crystallization. Unless there's some legend of El-Cid doing crazy fire stuff that could be crystallized as a Prana Burst, I'm going to have to say no. If there is something like that though, source it and you might be okay.

For the NPs, please explain how the legend links up with them instead of just giving the effects. An NP is a crystallization of feat, so say what feats and legends are being crystallized in those Noble Phantasms. I'll evaluate the NPs properly once that's done.

Noble Phantasm Parameter

@KoL

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

[Turboshitter]

<Snipped quote by Turboshitter>

Well, like I said on the last page, things are on a rolling basis so there's not really slot claiming. Moonman's Rider app, while not approved, is nearly done, so you can get the Rider slot but it'll require getting approved before him. KoL's also been working on a Caster, which has not yet been approved.

@Unoedipal

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[Unoedipal]

@Turboshitter
I-I'd actually recommend you do a different class so Moonman's work doesn't go to waste. ;;

[Turboshitter]

SORRY CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER HOW FAST I'M GOING

*Turbo remembered he's been waiting forever for an opportunity to use this Servant*

[Moonman]

Made the needed adjustments and finished the personality section, so I suppose that means I'm done.

[KoL]

@Unoedipal

Made the edits you required. Please take another look at my CS.

[Turboshitter]

I gotta go to work soon but this is what I've got done so far (personality is blank because I usually overdo it and write a shit-ton, but I don't have time for that right now):

Rider

Khutulun

Class: Rider

Gender: Female

Alignment: Neutral Good

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Personality:

History: en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Khutulun

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Parameters

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STR: A
END: A
AGL: D
MP: D
LCK: C

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Class Skills

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Riding (A+)

Magic Resistance (D)

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Personal Skills

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Bravery (B)

Bökh (Wrestling) (A+++)

Military Tactics (C)

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Weapons

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HER GODDAMN BARE HANDS

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Noble Phantasm

Tümen Takhi

The spoils of love and war

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Rank: E ~ A++

Type: Anti-Army

Range: 1-99

Maximum number of targets: 10000

The culmination of many victories, and the pride of an undefeated warrior princess; Khutulun's vast army of horses. Forfeited to her sometimes one by one and sometimes in numbers by the many suitors who challenged Khutulun for the right to marry her, these horses make up the vast bulk of the Mongolian princess' fighting abilities, and each horse reflects the unique obstacles she had to overcome to claim victory.

The herd represents many different breeds, containing horses from all around the world and even some members of the Phantasmal Species, and Khutulun has taken the time to get to know each and every one of them, taming them with her overwhelming spirit and sheer force of will. They listen to her without question, and lie in wait for the moment she summons them.

They are central to her unique style of horseback martial arts, and she is never seen without one. Summoning one or two at a time is almost effortless, and doesn't take much energy or concentration. Summoning dozens or hundreds is a more challenging or daunting task, and summoning thousands is said to be nearly impossible for her with her level of mana. Should she summon all ten thousand horses at once, it'd surely be in some form of suicide attack, as the cost of using so much mana would leave her nearly unable to sustain her physical form, let alone fight.

Regardless, the heavenly stable of horses is an invaluable tool to Khutulun, or indeed any Rider, and a powerful Noble Phantasm.

Sorry for all the fuss but Khutulun is one of my all-time favorite historical badasses/women warriors and I've been waiting forever to use her in a Grail War ^^;

[Unoedipal]

Made the needed adjustments and finished the personality section, so I suppose that means I'm done.

@Moonman

Yes, you're approved.

@Turboshitter, I'm really sorry especially since you obviously really want to play this character, but as it is, Moonman made his final edits before you posted your character, and there are a couple of things I'd need you to change/clarify on your CS before I approved it, so unless you're able to persuade Moonman to change classes, you won't be able to be Rider.

Again, I'm sorry, but it's unfair for me to do anything else. I'll try to help you as best I can with getting a different app together.

@KoL
Didn't notice the modifier on LCK earlier. Please give a justification for it.

On Tizona, change the Type to Anti-Mind. B++ is also definitely too high, as that's just a step away from being equivalent to Divine Spirit Thaumaturgy and, while El Cid was good with psychological warfare, it's not enough to justify something at that sheer scale. A flat B rank should be the maximum.

On La Colada, I'm confused as to why a duel to the death is crystallized as a curse that lowers parameters, since the parameter lowering seems to be something based around the post-fight, whereas the point of a duel to the death is that there is no post-fight. If anything, it seems like it should be something more similar to Ath nGabla.

[KoL]

[Unoedipal]

<Snipped quote by Unoedipal>

Since I won't have time to make the actual edits now, I'll just ask about them and change it later, once I'm able to.

- Noted, but could you at least let me have one + modifier, to use under the described circumstances? I don't think it will be so common as to make her OP or anything like that.

- Maybe a small bounded field that forces a foes to fight El Cid one on one with no option of retreat or refusal, and during the duration of the field, El Cid is treated as having A rank STR? Or being able to do one C rank attack that works under the same mechanics of Gae Bolg, which represents his skill as a warrior?

@KoL

That's fine, but keep in mind that the cost of using it will rise as well.

I don't see how you'd get causality reversal from "fought a duel to the death". You can just do something like Ath nGabla instead of making it a Bounded Field, and say that STR is treated as rank-up during the engagement. You could make it a Bounded Field instead, but since we've already got something similar in canon, I don't see any harm in modeling it after that.

[KoL]

@Unoedipal

Sure, I can go with those changes.

[Turboshitter]

*sighs* Alright. Not the end of the world I guess. There's an Archer from the same "badass warrior women" list of mine that I've been meaning to use, so I guess I'll go with her. Out of curiosity, what changes would you have had me make? It might help with my next sheet.

Also, I know Artoria Lancer is out, but anyone who apps Tamamo-no-Mae or EMIYA will also have my eternal love and adoration (just slightly less of it lol).

[kusanagifire]

Hmm. I think we need more master cses lol.

[KoL]

@Unoedipal

I beg you pardon, but it seems that I'll have to resign this for RL related reasons. I got a new project in college that will eat away my time, so I won't be able to keep up with your frequency demands. I can come back once the coast is clearer, but got the time being I would like to not disrupt your efforts.

[Unoedipal]

@KoL Depending on how often you'll be on, I'm fine with extending the 24 hour limit. That's why I said to let me know about real-life difficulties, after all~

If you don't think you'll be able to post any faster than, say, once a week, then that's probably too much though.

[KoL]

@Unoedipal

No, once a week as maximum between posts is manageable. I'll keep online all the time, it's just that I can't compromise on posting within a day. But every couple days or three days is possible as well. This is usually the same time frame from the other RPs that I'm in, do that I can safely alternate between them.

In any case, I'll finish Saber once I'm back home, but I'll leave the Master CS for some time up to the weekend, since it requires much more thought than simply tweaking a Servant.

Since you are willing to be more flexible I see no reason to quit.

[Unoedipal]

@Unoedipal

No, once a week as maximum between posts is manageable. I'll keep online all the time, it's just that I can't compromise on posting within a day. But every couple days or three days is possible as well. This is usually the same time frame from the other RPs that I'm in, do that I can safely alternate between them.

In any case, I'll finish Saber once I'm back home, but I'll leave the Master CS for some time up to the weekend, since it requires much more thought than simply tweaking a Servant.

Since you are willing to be more flexible I see no reason to quit.

@KoL

Alright. As a rule of thumb, if a post you need to reply to comes up, I'll give you some leeway on replying given your situation; though, I would like it if in such instances you could send me a quick PM just saying "I won't be able to reply for a bit", since that makes it a bit more fair on my end and less like I'm handing out special treatment. I won't make it mandatory, but it'd be appreciated.

[Hinsek]

Hider

Name: Sohni

Class: Berserker

Gender: Male

Appearance:

Alignment: Mad

Personality: Mad

History: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kalevipoeg
Weapon: Two swords.

Parameters:
Strength: A+
Endurance: A
Agility: B
Mana: C
Luck: E-

Class Skills:
Mad Enhancement(B): Rank up for parameters, but most of one's reason is robbed.

Personal Skills:
Battle Continuation(B):The strength of vitality for predicaments. Also, the ability to withdraw from combat and reach allied territory alive after being defeated.

Monstrous Strength(B): An ability possessed by monsters and beasts, temporary boost of the Strength parameter by one rank for a time limit determined by the ranking of this skill. Sohni is a lake sized half-giant, but manifests in a more manageable form with the compensation of possessing this skill. The more this skill is used, the more a reversion to his original size occurs.

Heroic Body(B): A skill denoting a physical constitution that is resistant to effects that debilitate the physical body or parameters. At the rank of B, any effects that seek to degrade physical capabilities or the body's health must be of B rank or above.

Noble Phantasm(s):
Name: Blade of Consequence
Title: Herald of Fate
Rank: B
NP Type: Anti-Unit
Range: 1-3
Maximum Number of Targets: 1
Description:
The first blade that Sohni wielded. A holy sword forged with the combined effort of an entire family of renowned smiths for seven years, determined to be matchless in Estonia. It was the only sword that Sohni could wield without shattering with one single blow, and it was also a sword that designated Sohni's worth by being one that split a stone of deciding, being perhaps a parallel or prototype to the swords of selection wielded by King Arthur and Cu Chulainn. The blade is fully sentient and can move via levitation of its own accord, with speed being equivalent to how fast Sohni himself is. It is capable of speech and possesses a deep bond with Sohni in a manner similar to that which is present between a familiar and its creator. Basic warning against danger and the like can be transferred from the blade to Sohni himself, provided the blade sees and senses whatever danger it wishes to warn about. The sword has a powerful magic resistance, as it was unable to be enchanted to be lighter or converted to any easily movable format by a great magus in the Age of Gods. The magic resistance is equivalent to that of A rank. The sword, however, loses its own sense of sanity the more Sohni performs acts that are deemed immoral. It will eventually begin twisting the nature of orders it receives until it finally becomes rebellious against Sohni. Due to its role as Sohni's ultimate killer through a twist of fate, it permanently reduces Sohni's luck to the lowest level. On a side note, the sword also has an incredibly potent anti-healing attribute to it, as the wounds if inflicted could not be healed even by the pantheon of gods and goddesses of Estonia.

Name: Blade of Greed
Title: Herald of Struggles
Rank: D+++
NP Type: Anti-Unit(Self)
Range: 1-3
Maximum Number of Targets: 1
Description:
The second blade that Sohni wielded, and the one he uses in battle now. It is a demonic sword forged from the depths of hell and one of hell's great treasures. The blade was never really tested in combat, and the only thing Sohni fully knew about it was that it was a blade that would surpass all others he knew of. This noble phantasm sublimates that ideal. The blade is initially simply a sturdy demonic sword with no particular special traits about it. However, if Sohni bears witness to any other weapons he recognizes as swords, the blade will upgrade itself, attempting to surpass the blades that Sohni has seen and recognized. The process of surpassing is basically a process of copying. The blade simply copies the properties of blades that have a rank greater than that of B on the noble phantasm scale. The blade is incapable of copying or surpassing anything on the level of divine mystery, but will attempt to create downgraded copies regardless. Divine constructs are also incapable of being surpassed. Due to the effects of mad enhancement, the blade is only capable of actualizing this process exactly once, and it cannot be reverted. Actually surpassing the original blade can only occur if Sohni clashes with the superior blade three times or more, wherein the blade simply ranks up the effects of the original it tries to surpass.

Thar be a zerker sheet for approval.

[Turboshitter]

Question. Is the Second Owner a Master we can app for?

[Unoedipal]

Question. Is the Second Owner a Master we can app for?

@Turboshitter

She's an NPC that I'll be playing, you can see the information about her that's publicly known in the OP.

EDIT: I misread. No, she's not a Master. She's just hanging out in her castle and eating cereal.

@Hinsek

So the soul of the Kalevide flew down from heaven like a bird, and was bidden to reanimate his body; but the might of all the gods, and even the divine wisdom of Taara, could not put his legs on again. Then they mounted him on a white charger, and sent him to the post which had been assigned to him at the gates of Põrgu.
When the Kalevide reached the rocky portal, a voice was heard from heaven, "Strike the rock with thy fist!" He did so, and clove open the rock, and his right hand was caught in the cleft. Here he sits now on his horse at the gates of Põrgu, watching the bonds of others while bound himself. The demons attempt unceasingly to soften their chains by heaping up charcoal faggots around them, but when the cock crows at dawn their fetters grow thicker again. From time to time, too, the Kalevide struggles to free his hand from the wall of rock, till the earth trembles and the sea foams; but the hand of Mana holds him, that the warder shall never depart from his post. But one day a vast fire will break out on both sides of the rock and melt it, when the Kalevide will withdraw his hand, and return to earth to inaugurate a new day of prosperity for the Esthonians.

He's still alive, so he's ineligible. I'm sorry.

If you can find a different account of his legend that doesn't make him still alive, I can evaluate him though.