I'm so sorry for your loss; furbabies can be as precious as your own baby, as I've just recently learned.
I have a English Bulldog of three years. She's a big, pudgey dog that moves with a cute waddle. She has a shiny brown and white spotted coat, and her smiling mouth takes up 80% of her face. She loves my kids almost as much as I do, and is like another child altogether. She's the sassiest thing in my household, and we adore her for that. She's the first dog I've ever owned.
I hope you can gain some solace thinking about the joy other people have had with their animals, as well as the joy you've shared with your own. I wish you the best of luck in your recovery.