@ForsytheAfter taking a look and talking it over with the co-GM’s, we agreed that what’s posted right now just isn’t up to my standards, and is not a good fit for this roleplay.
As far as backstory goes, the new version is a sizable downgrade compared to the first draft, and that one had plenty of its own problems. The first requires some suspension of disbelief, as the father needed to join the WF AFTER they turned violent, while somehow being duped as easily as the teens and young adults showned in volume 2, and that's ignoring the plot hole that a dad with a human family he lived with for years, joined an organization bent on wiping out humanity.
The new one, to put it simply, does not befit the kind of character we want for this roleplay. As is said in the first post, characters in this RP are NOT the main characters of this world; they are primarily reactionary/non-influential to the main plot. You not only made her have famous (are at the very least well known) parents, but you also made her a prodigy, the kind of character a story would revolve around, not support(whilst claiming you want her to be behind the others and struggling to ctach up. also a trait common in main characters).
Outside of that, the weapon is lacking in the power level department. I know some characters in the show have gotten away with some pretty mundane weapons, but they have pretty specific reasons or that. If a weapon can’t have more than one form, i’d prefer it to have raw power to compensate. Yours has about 5 shots that deal maybe as much damage as Pyrrha's rifle, while having a shorter range and being hard to carry; So basically it needs more oomph. More oomph can mean more shapes or more power, but at least one of them would be nice to add going to a true magazine or some kind of auto-loader would work quite well.
TL;DR Backstory needs to be dialed down, and dose the weapon with Rule of Cool.
If you haven't been completely driven off by this second denial, feel free to give it another shot, but after that we'll give someone else a chance to join.
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