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    1. Phloem 11 yrs ago

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GEEETTTTTTT DUNKED ON



[ 19 - they/them - ISTP - GMT+8 ]

this is phloem and i'm literally the worst
...forreal tho hmu if you wanna rp

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Ezra doesn’t reply, only going so far as to direct a small, near imperceptible nod at Alytra when she rambled her farewells. Contrary to what this gesture might’ve suggested, and what the girl might’ve believed, there wasn’t anything she could do for him. Not while they were still stuck in here, anyway. This mess was something he had gotten himself into, his own private hell, and perhaps, he’d already dug too deep for reparations to be of any real use. For him, however, this personal suffering had become a conduit of sorts for other people’s. Just walking down the corridors of Remmington’s was an agony, an aching slog through every stranger’s own hardships. This guy’s PTSD, and that girl’s depression - they were in hell, too, but it was everybody’s hell, this endless, white sea of chemical waste.

A light, almost-gentle touch at the back of his neck jerks Ezra out of his thoughts, fingers curling into fists at the sudden intrusion of personal space. Looking up at the man before him, his expression curdles into a scowl. A telltale sign of rebellion, even as he continues to do whatever he’s told. Still, no matter what he tricked himself into believing, there were no doubts about who the dominant party was, in this situation; the imperious look on Smith’s face only affirming it. This, much like everything else in life, had to be borne, and his current need for that sweet, sweet nicotine seemed to quell most of the perturbation that heralded what was to come.

Taking the plastic cup from Gregg, Ezra downs the pills and swallows hard. The bitterness dissipates almost as soon as he hands the cup back to the scientist, but the scratched, scraping sensation in the walls of his throat remains. It was something he’d never get used to, no matter how many times he’d done it before, even if it was the least of his worries.

“You know I’m just trying to help you.” Smith begins, and there’s even a hint of contrition in his voice. “Dr. Remmington wouldn’t -”

“Don’t.” Ezra’s interruption is swift and sure, his rage managing to slice through the haze of drugs. “Don’t even try to explain any of this. Don’t pretend that this is all on me, because you’d be fucking blind not to see it.”

He could see the muscles in Gregg’s jaw working furiously, the way a fire lights up behind his eyes. But at the same time, the man also looked as if his inside had been scooped out and replaced with lead. He is trying so hard not to show his anger-slash-dismay, though Ezra knew better. That was the thing about Gregg, so plainly transparent whenever he tried not to be. All that effort put into bottling up his emotions? They were all for naught, now that Ezra had learnt to see right through him.

Almost as abruptly as he’d exploded, however, Ezra folded right back up - all that white, hot rage burning out into ashes. Instead of lashing out once again, he just grabbed his companion by the wrist, and began leading him towards Room 2. “Come on, I’d like a smoke before someone else comes around to bust my ass.”



It wasn’t until a little after midnight that Ezra stumbled back to his room. If it were anyone else, they would’ve gotten in trouble for wandering around past lights-out, but the hallways were deserted, and none of the orderlies seemed to be around to flag him down. That was one of the perks, he supposed, of his little arrangement with Gregg. It wasn’t a particularly comforting thought, though, bile beginning to rise at the back of his throat.

The entirety of Remmington’s Angels was silent, the only sound Ezra could hear being the faint buzzing of fluorescent lights. Bleary eyes scanned the heavy, steel doors that lined each side of the corridor - 15, 16, before finally, 17.

Slipping quietly inside, Ezra sat down on the edge of his own cot, at the far left of the room. In spite of the darkness, he could still see the faint silhouette of what appeared to be his roommate. Out cold, as usual. The boy always seemed to be passed out, and if there was a time where Ezra had actually seen him awake, he didn’t remember. Right now, though, he could care less about making friends. Satisfying his need for a cancer stick remained top priority.

With shaking hands, Ezra slips one of the newly-acquired cigarettes between his lips, lighting it with a cheap, plastic lighter he retrieves from under the pillow. For a moment, it almost looks as if the cigarette wouldn’t light, but soon enough, the paper begins to char, revealing the glowing, red cherry underneath. As clouds of blue, nicotine-tainted smoke fill his lungs, Ezra visibly relaxes, letting out a sigh of relief.

That asshole always got him the good shit, at least.
Oh man, I totally forgot about that too. I might've gotten a little too excited. :x

Aaaand my post is finally up, it's kinda poop, though. I think I changed tenses three quarters of the way through but I'm way too tired to go back and fix it right now.
His eyes narrowed, just minutely, but there was no mistaking it - Ezra wasn't pleased. Even without saying a single word, the irritation he felt was tangible, hanging thick and heavy in the air. If there was anything in the world he hated more than this place, it would be people probing into his own, personal business. Especially business of this particular nature. What happened between him and this mysterious ‘benefactor’ of his... Ezra would never admit it, though a small part of him wondered how fast daddy dearest would blow a gasket, if he ever did find out.

“Then I'm sorry to disappoint.” Ezra smirked, and there was a kind of liturgical finality to his words, booming and solemn like the 'Amen' at the end of a benedictory prayer. His mind was already made up, and his lips sealed. There was no way he was going to discuss the matter with anyone. Ever. Confiding in a so-called 'kindred spirit' was already proving more trouble than it was worth. Perhaps he would've been better off keeping to himself, after all.

As Alytra mentioned lights-out, however, a wave of nausea swept over him. Ezra had barely noticed the sky getting dark outside, and he had to bite the inside of his cheek to tether himself to reality. It couldn't be the end of the day already, could it? With each passing day, time seemed to grow increasingly elusive, like dust through his fingers. And yet, even after doing nothing but laze around the entire day, Ezra found himself exhausted - though it wasn't something sleep could fix. It was a tiredness that seeped into your very bones, that telltale ache taking root in your muscles like a chronic illness. Without the tar from a cigarette coating the insides of his lungs, he felt even worse than usual, and -

“Ezra.”

...Shit.

“It's almost lights out. What are you still doing out here?”

Ezra turned, with such an in-his-own-good-time deadpan, that it was impossible to tell whether he'd heard anything. Clinging onto the childish conclusion that if he didn't look, they would go away, he studiously avoided the newcomer's gaze. But for just a split second, his resolve faltered, and he dared a furtive glance at the source of the voice.

Standing a few yards away, was a man. He was about six feet tall, in his thirties, with a crisp, white lab coat draped over his shoulders. Truth be told, there was nothing particularly remarkable about the scientist. He was tall, but not freakishly so, and the weight he carried seemed to balance things out somewhat. Built like a linebacker, he was the last person anyone wanted to get into a scuffle with. And yet, he never really got to exercise his authority, instead spending the greater part of his time running errands for Dr. Remmington. But still, there was something about his stare, something in those dull, amber hues of his that made Ezra uncomfortable.

“What can I do for you, doc?” Ezra finally spoke up, after a long moment, false courage belying his apprehension.

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe you could actually follow the rules, for once.“ the man replied, almost conversationally, but Ezra could tell there was something else beneath it all, something dark, when his gaze flickered towards Alytra. Jealousy, maybe? Possessiveness sounded better still. “And, you haven’t taken your night meds yet.”

“Isn’t that the nurses’ job?” As the tiny, plastic cup in his hand rattles with mood stabilisers and antipsychotics, the sound makes Ezra grimace. “I’m not taking them.”

“I gave you that extra cigarette. The least you can do for me is take your pills, you know what happens when you don’t.”

That’s when the barrier of intrepidity around Ezra falls, crumbling, faltering, until there was nothing left of it. “Fine.” Finally, he submits, words escaping in a muted hiss. He is slow to stand, but his movements are deliberate, crossing the remaining distance to where the scientist stood.

Before anything else conspired, however, Gregg pulls Ezra aside, shooting a pointed look at Alytra. “Back to your room. Now.”
I'll try to post when I get back from work tomorrow, I'm tired as hell. x.x
Ezra could empathise, he knew exactly how Alytra felt. At Remmington’s, without a calendar to keep track, days melted into weeks, and months into days. The place never seemed to change, either. Same walls, same people, same drugs, same everything. Each passing second felt like a bloated eternity, and some days, Ezra was sure the monotony would drive him mad. Well - madder, if you want to be picky about it.

“Eight months, a year. What’s the difference?” Sharp stabs of fatigue lent his voice a gravelly creakiness, and it was almost as if he had to heave the words from his jaw with a shovel. Still, he made a token effort of straightening his posture, draping an arm across the back of the couch. “Feels like a goddamned lifetime, either way.”

As the girl continued, Ezra couldn’t quash the feeling of dread welling up in his stomach. He knew where this was going, and when Alytra finally popped the question, he was hardly shocked. Not many patients earned the supposed ’privilege’ of cigarettes - the fact that his carcinogenic hobby hadn’t been brought up in conversation earlier was an achievement in and itself. But that didn’t stop his phlegmatic, drugged-up mask from slipping. Venom. In a single, ephemeral second, however, it faded, almost as quickly as it’d surfaced. Even with his eyes at half-mast, one could still see the pupils, as dark and sticky as a tar pit.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Ezra’s voice was oddly clipped, and it was clear, despite the apparent insouciance, that Alytra had hit a nerve with her question. Rationalising - as he had tried many times before - would be of no use, he realised. No amount of excuses, big or small, would justify his actions. He knew that after he’d accepted that very first cigarette, there was no going back, and he’d be a fool to dig himself a deeper hole than he’d already done. Though he did find some solace in the fact that he wasn’t alone in such an arrangement. “The ‘right connections’… That’s funny.”
I have no idea where I was going with his history, haha. Just made some changes to it, though. Hope it's still alright. Aged him up to make it extra creepy, and also because earning a doctorate before 30 seems pretty unlikely. :P

EDIT: Working on my post now, will be up in a few!
I'd be up for this.
Well, this was new. Whenever Ezra brought up the subject of his family name, there was usually a spark of recognition; a turning of gears as they came to realise just who he was. The Pinkertons were often said to be up there with the Waltons and the Kochs, having dominated the US shipping industry since the early 20s, and to put it gently - you had to be living under a rock to not have heard of them. Today, however, it seemed as if he had finally encountered an exception to the rule. Whether or not he was pleased by the peculiar turn of events, Ezra couldn’t tell, but it was certainly a refreshing deviation from the norm.

Was rich, and none taken. They’re all a bunch of douchebags, anyway.” Ezra wasn’t so petty as to take an offhanded comment like that to heart. Growing up, he’d always been taught to have thick skin, and to take things with a grain of salt. Sticks and stones, right? Not like it was much help to him when he was in one of his “moods”, but right now, for lack of a better term, he was too out of it to get into it. The drugs they gave him in Remmington’s were good for one thing, he supposed - keeping those nasty, raging emotions at bay. “Eight months, huh? I’ve been here a little longer. …I think.”

And then, there was the downside. With the chemical cocktail of pills and injections given to him, Ezra could barely remember what he had for breakfast, let alone how much time he’d spent at Remmington’s. But if he had to decide on a certain timeframe, it’d be somewhere close to a year, give or take. Though with his addled mind, he couldn’t be sure. Those trips to the ‘shock shop’ in the beginning of January must’ve taken more out of him than he’d thought.

Tentatively, Ezra’s gaze flickered upwards, towards the spiky, purple mess sitting atop Alytra’s head. As he spoke, his fingers finally found purchase, tearing away the flaking piece of skin from his lip. “They let you keep your hair like that?”
Apologies if I came off rude and/or dismissive, I just meant that in a way that I don't feel confined to any part of the gender binary. But for convenience's sake, they/them pronouns would be fine. :)
Alright, cool. I'm at work, right now though. So I'll get to that when I get home. Any kind of pronoun would be fine, ningal, gender isn't really something I give much thought to. :P

@Bird
Sounds good. I've got no objections.
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