SilverPaw

Shadow Smiles

Jacqueline's first impressions were hazy, sluggish thoughts crawling their way to sharpness, a coolness to her cheek, a tepid wetness under her legs and palms, a predominately irony scent mixed with hints of ammonia and an itching, whole body ache that seemed to be dissipating as the long minutes of her return to consciousness passed. The first sound she uttered was a groan turned whimper as her abused throat made its protests known.

She tried to open her eyes, her eyelashes fluttering in a struggle, apparently stuck together by something sticky. She brought a hand to her face to rub at her eyes but was stopped by a sharp spike in the irony scent, her heart rate speeding up as she recognized it for what it was – blood. The shock was enough for her eyes to open and she could see thin red strings tearing in half over her lashes, some inevitably getting into her eyes, making her tear up to dispel the aggravators.

The blood and…other bodily fluids where everywhere. Fuck, I must have pissed myself. But that was not all; there were much more unwholesome things there – skin, various meaty and soft tissues, ichor, some other unrecognizable blobs and–

Were those shards of bones?

A quiet keening whimper escaped her as she felt nausea overwhelm her and she threw up. First there was nothing but contractions, then went her earlier meal, the occasional food chunks, partly processed, mixed and expelled with digestive fluids. Jacqueline was sweating and trembling, her heart beating faster again, barely having been given any reprieve beforehand. All in all, she felt terrible, and tried valiantly, although not entirely successfully, not to get any vomit on herself. And if the smell was bad before…

When she was finally done, she felt vaguely better. Ignoring the part of the apartment that looked as if from a bad but violent horror movie, she stood up and stumbled her way to the bathroom, going straight into the shower. She undressed while under the stream, trying to clean both her body and her clothes.

Long, long minutes of intense scrubbing, applying and reapplying of soap, shower gel, shampoo and regenerator, and gallons of warm water later, Jacqueline felt clean. Well, cleaner. She stepped out, avoiding the bloody footprints on her otherwise soft rug, leaving behind her most likely ruined clothes in a soggy but less gory heap, still dripping, the small rivulets of pale red slowly gathering to make their swirling exit via the drain. Still in a daze, she took a towel and, hugging it close to her body, padded barefoot to her bedroom. Careless of the wet patch she would leave behind, she sat on the bed and stared blindly ahead, blinking now and then.

Then memories tried to kick in. She suppressed them with great effort. Clearing her throat after another small, pathetic whimper, she calmed down her ragged breathing, counting on each inhale. Then, a phrase came to her mind and she felt as if she were clubbed over the head and struck by lightning in quick succession. New security concerns for NSC.

“Security concerns…you FUCKING BITCH!” she screeched. Rationally, she knew her mother couldn’t have known that what she experienced was probably what the upped security measures were about. Rationally, she knew no one, least of all her practical parents, would believe something this horrifying could be true unless they experienced it themselves. Rationally, she knew this might not, in fact, just have happened. Jacqueline was not at all rational just then. And she believed. She believed what happened was very much real. She seethed long moments at the injustice, the rage, the humiliation and even, yes indeed, even fear. Terror. Something that could easily turn into panic and paranoia.

Like HELL. Like hell am I letting that thing control me. God, if I haven’t given in this long to all the bullshit in my life, why would I give in to some monster? No way. NO WAY.

A determined breath. A straightening of her posture. A turn of her thoughts.

Fuck, this is not normal. I can feel it. It. What is it? Shit, maybe I’m not even human anymore.

She looked at her hands. As she flexed them, claws easily manifested, as if sliding out of a hidden sheath beneath her skin. She had felt that change, more than an hour ago now, so this was no surprise. The transformation was just as easy to revert – a thought and there were her hands, her fingers just as they usually were, pinkish flesh over soft tissue, no hard, glistening reddish black chitin anywhere in sight. Even though she wanted nothing more than to forget, flashes of her other form were ingrained deep into her memory. She wasn’t sure what, exactly, she was. Was that other one something she could always access as easily, now? No matter. What happened, the security, if these two things aren’t connected then my birth name isn’t Jacqueline Aelia Galloway.

She stood up. Threw her towel to the floor. Opened her wardrobe. Picked out the most unassuming clothes she owned – jeans and jogging wear, she thought – and packed some extras in a small, fashionable if old, black leather backpack. I wish I had more actual money, she thought as she stuffed all the banknotes she kept at home in her wallet. She had a credit card, of course, but her purchases and therefore her location could be tracked if she used it. I just hope the rumours about them – and I wish I knew who they are in this case – being able to track anything and everything aren’t true. Still…taking my phone with me is out of the question. Just as well that I’m not sure where it is right now. Possibly in that– by the door. Fuck, how am I even going to get past that?

Her glance passed a walled mirror and she frowned mildly. If they’re going to be searching for me, doing it based on appearance isn’t as likely as some other means. Even so… She packed a stylish sports cap, chik sunglasses and a small case of makeup for later. This better not be wasted effort. Whoever deals with cases like this, they might just be waiting outside for me to show up or something. God, just let me get out of this city, and I swear I’ll believe in you. Honest. I need this that badly. So, please. Any deity will do.

Hell. She felt a minor trembling start but shook out of it. Careful not to step on or otherwise touch any of the gore still left near the entrance – thankfully visible only once inside her actual flat – and after making sure no-one was nearby, closing the door carefully, she made her way confidently to the elevator. Appearances still matter, right? I’m just going for a jog. Nothing unusual. All’s well. If I believe it they will too. Shit, this better work.

.Hack ___Welcome to The World___

I know I watched some .Hack anime awhile (some years) back and I'm generally interested in virtual reality games, so yeah, I think I could get into this.

Dark matter - Mages in Space

So am I.

Alphabet Game

Or Russia and Slovakia. We're missing V now? Venezuela.

Alphabet Game

Iceland

Alphabet Game

Greece

Shadow Smiles

“There seem to be some new security concerns for NSC. Take care.” Jacqueline frowned as she re-read the message, her work finally finishing up. So is it something major or what? If mother had to send information she could have at least made it more revealing. Too tired to truly care, she shrugged lightly. There was a flurry of activity all around as multiple people were leaving the office complex – one of the few in the city connected to a court, which Jacqueline had to visit and be present in daily. Resigned to leaving with the crowd, she mustered her patience and exited her office, locking it after. She navigated her way to the nearest elevator with the utmost grace. As much as she sometimes wished to elbow through the crowd roughly, this wasn’t that kind of a place.

She breathed an inaudible sigh of relief when she was finally outside the building, the mass dispersing into the city. Jacqueline watched the swarm with mild distaste. I cannot wait until I have more flexible hours. Mildly hungry, she decided to take a walk. She leisurely strolled through the busy walkways, indifferent to the hurrying, her posture confident, her gaze conveying a sense of purpose despite her comparatively slow walk. About 40 minutes later, she arrived to a small but cozy and fairly unfrequented locale; she knew it would be busier during the night. Jacqueline liked the ambiance and food well enough to visit it once a while.

Once finished, she took a tram back to the stop closest to her home. She could see the increase in security personnel at various keypoints throughout this district and assumed it was the same for the rest of the city. People were already whispering about the occurrence, speculating. The hell is this about, really? Jacqueline felt nervous, not so much about whatever danger was suspected, but rather as to how this would affect her specifically. Also, not that she would admit it, the heightened surveillance that she knew would be engaged – it was usually limited to and, more importantly, under the supervision of private companies – caused her to feel confined and concerned in general. She did not like the feeling. She was thankful that it was nowhere near pathological – truly paranoid people were the ones who believed that they were constantly under the government’s or some other powerful organization’s supervision – but considered her wariness to be unnecessary.

Arriving at the tram stop, she glanced around casually. She couldn’t help but feel observed. What does my therapist like to say? Why do I feel others might want to monitor me, isn’t it? Well…There is no reason. I just enjoy my privacy. Try to rest easy in the knowledge that I’m a law-abiding citizen…That’s right. I always know what to do. So what does it matter how many people see what I do? I’m good at it all. No, wait…she’d say that even if I make a mistake it’s not so terrible or something, right? It’s acceptable. Okay. That’s good. It happens to the best. I can be the best even with mistakes. Lessen the ones I can control, don’t worry about the ones I can’t…I’m sure she’ll be proud that I have this internalized now, she thought the last bit with sarcasm. It was true that visits at a therapist were good for anyone’s continued well-being and thankfully any stigma that might have existed about doing so in the past was long since eradicated. In fact, having a good counsellor was pretty much a status symbol. Just like having any other expensive thing is.

Just as Jacqueline finally reached a state of tranquillity, she saw a flash of unnatural darkness peripherally. She stopped abruptly, her spine stiffening, shoulders tensing, a chill running down her whole body, raising the various fine hairs in automatic response. She swallowed uncomfortably. I should note this down to mention at the next meeting. She resumed walking, picking up her pace, her heart still racing. She swore she could almost feel something following her, trying to reach her. She hurried into her apartment complex and entered an empty elevator, relaxing when it finally closed without anyone else entering.

“Why, hello there,” a smug voice said from behind.

Jacqueline gasped, her eyes widening, but thankfully did not scream. She felt the elevator ascending and attributed the sinking feeling in her stomach to that.

“You really weren’t that hard to pin down, you know,” it leered and Jacqueline felt a hot breath whooshing past her neck. It smelled like rot; sickly sweet and bitter, with a hint of rust and dampness. She could taste the decay on her tongue and grimaced.

“Please leave,” Jacqueline said, her voice somewhat hoarse and definitely shaky, quieter than usual.

The thing, the looming darkness that she could sense a step behind her, could see its shadow even, and some sort of tendrils from the corners of her eyes, laughed. It was a sound of amusement, certainly malicious to Jacqueline’s ears. “Tsk, tsk. How could I do that when you are just the thing I was looking for? Such promise,” it seemed to sigh wistfully at that last.

The elevator reached the floor Jacqueline lived on and she dashed out of it, full out running to her apartment, her keys already in hand. She unlocked the door after some nervous fumbling then closed it back as soon as she was inside, without regard to wherever that thing following her was.

“Oh, you definitely need some adjustments. That was a simply pathetic attempt,” it said casually, and facing towards the inside of her flat, where the thing had manifested out of nowhere, Jacqueline could finally see it. It was taller than any man, brushing the ceiling with its back, which was bent so its head could have a place to occupy. Its most prominent future besides the general horror-like darkness which served as its body was the wide, seemingly endless smile, mocking for all to see.

“Here,” it said as it threw a small object it had apparently been carrying towards her. “This should help clear things up,” the round thing flew towards her, capturing Jacqueline’s attention long enough that she identified the thing as an eye. It was obviously no regular eye – tendrils were flowing out of it and even though she made no move to catch it, it latched onto her. A tendril wrapped around her neck first, another burrowed its way up her nostril, multiple ones slithered their way towards her own eyes and the others explored the rest of her face.

Caught in her own horror, fighting whimpers, tears, snot and saliva that threatened to escape or choke her, Jacqueline wasn’t truly aware of when the thing left, its final words unregistered by her. The abrupt and intense pain due to the invasion caused her to lose consciousness what felt like a hellish eternity later.

Shadow Smiles

Not at all. I think this just has a bit of a slower pace compared to some other RPGs which honestly suits me perfectly fine at this time. And I hope to at least start writing another post this week.

Business of Death

I can't say for sure.

Blorbs - A World Without Limits (...Kinda)

>>Take brass bell.
>>Feeling INSPIRED, attempt to freeze a pathway across the river with magic.