Bravery.
Many people interpret bravery in many different ways. Some see running into a burning building as brave. Many perceived bravery as being an army veteran or war hero, whereas others yet view bravery as the police on the beat, ready to face danger.
Thomas wasn't too sure what exactly bravery was, or quite what it meant to him. He certainly knew he wasn't brave. Infact, he saw himself as a complete and utter coward. A meek, frightened and nervous soul who looked in the mirror everyday and was disgusted by what he saw.
He saw a frightful monster before his very eyes. An ugly, disgusting freak not worthy of love, compassion nor affection. Someone who had many more blemishes than perfections. Someone who was only worthy of being left, of being tossed into the trash and left to rot away.
Shaking his head to try and rid himself of the thoughts that raged through his mind, Thomas padded over to his closet, pulling it open and rummaging through the clothing that had fallen to the floor during previous hunts. Pulling out a suitcase from under the pile, his long fingers shakily input the combination, almost ripping the lid off as he flung it open to find a folded up, freshly washed and ironed dress inside. Pulling it out, his fingers brushed the fabric with a sigh of utter relief.
Laying it out on his bed, his eyes studied the item before he disposed of his shirt and jeans beside the bed. Taking care to avoid looking into the mirror, he pulled the dress up and over his thin, frail form. A small, genuine smile played across his lips, the teenager spinning in place for a few seconds. He felt much better in this than the masculine clothes he'd been wearing, as though something being pushed down inside him was left free, like releasing a bird from a cage.
His hands smoothed out the white summer dress, his mind racing as he tried to consider any possible combinations to wear with the dress. He had lots of frilly socks and cute shoes, and beautiful hair bows he could place in his shoulder length, curly red locks of silky smooth hair.
He saw himself as ugly, frightening, imperfect because he couldn't quite come to terms with his gender identity. The fact he struggled to accept he was a woman trapped in a man's body projected and manifested itself on his psyche, and played utter hell with what he saw in the mirror. He understood he loved women's clothing, but not exactly why, or why he was so compelled to wear it.
In this frame of mind, Tom completely understood bravery. He just couldn't quite get that little spark of bravery in his head to light the fuse and detonate the dynamite inside which would allow the bravery to burst forth and take full affect. He didn't know how to tell others, to understand himself and be whom he was.
So Tabby remained buried in fractured parts in his fragile mind, wanting to join together and bury Thomas. Bury the personality that was slowly destroying him.
//Tommy is 15. He needs a mother or big sister to help him come to terms with his gender identity, and seek out the support and assistance he needs to transition. This will be long term.
Many people interpret bravery in many different ways. Some see running into a burning building as brave. Many perceived bravery as being an army veteran or war hero, whereas others yet view bravery as the police on the beat, ready to face danger.
Thomas wasn't too sure what exactly bravery was, or quite what it meant to him. He certainly knew he wasn't brave. Infact, he saw himself as a complete and utter coward. A meek, frightened and nervous soul who looked in the mirror everyday and was disgusted by what he saw.
He saw a frightful monster before his very eyes. An ugly, disgusting freak not worthy of love, compassion nor affection. Someone who had many more blemishes than perfections. Someone who was only worthy of being left, of being tossed into the trash and left to rot away.
Shaking his head to try and rid himself of the thoughts that raged through his mind, Thomas padded over to his closet, pulling it open and rummaging through the clothing that had fallen to the floor during previous hunts. Pulling out a suitcase from under the pile, his long fingers shakily input the combination, almost ripping the lid off as he flung it open to find a folded up, freshly washed and ironed dress inside. Pulling it out, his fingers brushed the fabric with a sigh of utter relief.
Laying it out on his bed, his eyes studied the item before he disposed of his shirt and jeans beside the bed. Taking care to avoid looking into the mirror, he pulled the dress up and over his thin, frail form. A small, genuine smile played across his lips, the teenager spinning in place for a few seconds. He felt much better in this than the masculine clothes he'd been wearing, as though something being pushed down inside him was left free, like releasing a bird from a cage.
His hands smoothed out the white summer dress, his mind racing as he tried to consider any possible combinations to wear with the dress. He had lots of frilly socks and cute shoes, and beautiful hair bows he could place in his shoulder length, curly red locks of silky smooth hair.
He saw himself as ugly, frightening, imperfect because he couldn't quite come to terms with his gender identity. The fact he struggled to accept he was a woman trapped in a man's body projected and manifested itself on his psyche, and played utter hell with what he saw in the mirror. He understood he loved women's clothing, but not exactly why, or why he was so compelled to wear it.
In this frame of mind, Tom completely understood bravery. He just couldn't quite get that little spark of bravery in his head to light the fuse and detonate the dynamite inside which would allow the bravery to burst forth and take full affect. He didn't know how to tell others, to understand himself and be whom he was.
So Tabby remained buried in fractured parts in his fragile mind, wanting to join together and bury Thomas. Bury the personality that was slowly destroying him.
//Tommy is 15. He needs a mother or big sister to help him come to terms with his gender identity, and seek out the support and assistance he needs to transition. This will be long term.