Azimuth — Roleplayer Guild

WIP App: Name of nation: The Tsardom of Vaegir Species: Skunk men that excrete dank instead of stink for usage in meme fabrication. They are decidedly not silly and wholly reside in the realm of scientific fact. They have also enslaved a race of revolver using liopleurodons, and mostly use them as harem fodder. Description of government: Despite their name, they're actually a constitutional republic. The governmental head of the government is the president, who heads the government. Unlike many other societies with such a system, the vice president actually handles his assorted vices. Both the kind for clamping things in place and the kind that would cause scandal and outrage in many other societies of the galaxy. Vast amounts of drugs are refined from the pineal glands of other races generally unknown to the galactic community at large (and it tends to remain this way, given very few of these enslaved drug production races are allowed to exist outside of the vast planetary drug labs of Vaegir.) The skunks are trapped in a horrid two party system. But unlike Earth, the alternative is a literal skunk Nazi Party. I mean, skunks are already white and black. All they need is the red and they're set. It is extremely easy to be a Nazi if you happen to be a skunk beforehand. Given that skunks all have fairly long snouts, their attempts of demonizing propaganda tend to fall flat, and so they do not have the traction they need to really get anywhere. Judaism was also long outlawed as part of a blanket ban of religions that feature the letter "u". Today they mostly just focus on the Mormons. Description of military: The armored spine of the armored corps of Vaegir is provided by the Clyde Cleveland-class Land Dreadnought. Pictured below:

Unfortunately these things have way, way too much ground pressure for their own good and tend to be found in ditches. Foreign observers often mistake them for being static emplacements. Good thing they have otherwise wholly abandoned the concept of tanks in favor of things that are kinda like Strykers but they hover, have rail guns and have a lot thicker armor. Additionally they have entirely sacrificed their capacity for passengers and wait I suppose they actually more closely resemble tanks than Strykers a thousand apologies. The standard infantry rifle is the TFW-NO-BF-1. Pictured, again, below:

The TFW-NO-BF-2. It's light. Handle's adjustable for easy carrying, good for righties and lefties. Breaks down into four parts, undetectable by x-ray, ideal for quick, discreet interventions. A word on firepower. Titanium recharger, three thousand round clip with bursts of three to three hundred, and with the Replay button - another Vaegir invention - it's even easier. Their officers wear gasmasks, not because of intimidation or battlefield considerations, but because a space skunk tradition is the battlefield hotbox, wherein copious amounts of drugs are combusted in confined spaces in a communal activity. Officers are expected to maintain efficacy at all seconds of the day and so are bound by oath to not indulge in the space dank, space crank, or space fajungajank. Their space force utilizes capital ships with an unusual spherical design. These have trapdoor-like openings that unhinge and disgorge oodles upon oodles of fighters and other useless kibble. Their dreadnought analogue even has a giant grab hand. The Vaegir Meme Corps is the vital spine of the entire war machine. They ensure that a continual supply of memes is maintained and makes it to critical fronts of battle. The memes are vital to maintain the combat and sexual prowess of the space skunk infantryman abroad and at home. The presidential royal guard consists of biologically and cybernetically and synthetically altered skunks that have a crab hand and a normal hand, but demonstrate a preference for cutting shit up with their crab hand. It is a little known fact that Vaegir observers were present at Earth in the 1940s. It is an even lesser known fact that they infiltrated many terrestrial governments, including the US, German and Japanese governments. Skunk spies stole numerous weapons designs from the armed forces of these nations. Due to a mix up in translation, their analysis actually mistook the stolen blueprints of the Iowa, Bismarck and Yamato battleships for being the same thing. Their navy today has lineage to the original Iowabismarkamato. Attempts to adapt this design for space and air and land and sea usage has ended in dismal failure. Technological Overview: The TFW-NO-BF-1 is used for many different applications in Vaegir society. Need to turn the TV on? Shoot it. Need to turn it off? Shoot it again. Gotta open a jar of pickles? Shoot the darn thing. The TFW-NO-BF-1 is also the cornerstone of Vaegir democracy. Don't like the president? Shoot him. Three thousand times. With nets, freezing, and fire functions. Truly, the TFW-NO-BF-1 is a wondrous thing of many utilities. The TFW-NO-BF-2 is used for many different applications in Vaegir society. Need to turn the TV on? Shoot it. Need to turn it off? Shoot it again. Gotta open a jar of pickles? Shoot the darn thing. The TFW-NO-BF-1 is also the cornerstone of Vaegir democracy. Don't like the president? Shoot him. Three thousand times. With nets, freezing, and fire functions. Truly, the TFW-NO-BF-2 is a wondrous thing of many utilities. The primary means of transportation available to the Vaegir is the TRISM. Have to leave? Have to go? The fastest way is by TRISM. Just as the sun sends light through a prism, skunks send themselves through a TRISM. It was invented by Stella Corona. Cultural Overview: The Vaegir are a culture of useless consumers. They buy things in bulk and break them in bulk, which consequently leads to buying even more things. Everything is made to be disposable as possible. From cars, to nation sheets. Nothing is built to last among Skunk kind. Even their memes work on a "flavor of the month" basis, and are quite readily forgotten. Many make their ways into the hands of the Asteroid-dwelling Meme Scavengers, who continue to use the discarded memes for many years. These fearsome meme pirates strike fear into the hearts of all. Many a skunk song and dance have been written about these dastardly, but loveable, fiends. A Vaegir cultural staple is the everydaybirthday. Rather than an annual occurrence as in inferior human culture, the skunk celebrates every day of continued life. A majority of the population slaves away in the infamously infamous Meme Mills, where they are liable to develop cancers of a multitude of varieties. Therefore death, rather than survival, is the norm. This is offset by their propensity for orgies combined with their complete lack of the concept of contraceptives combined with their complete lack of rape as being considered a bad thing, and so there is a continual supply of births. Skunk funerals involve slapping the dead in an outpouring of rage for the deadee for having wasted the time of all those around them. History: There was a little known program used to send skunks to space by the USSR. However, they not only lost the skunk rockets, but gamma radiation turned them into walking, talking skunk people that spray memes. However, most of them ended up dead, rather than dank skunk memer master race. It is a tradition among Vaegir kind to pour one out for the homies that didn't make it to Andromeda.

WIP App: Name of nation: The Tsardom of Vaegir Species: Skunk men that excrete dank instead of stink for usage in meme fabrication. Description of government: Despite their name, they're actually a constitutional republic. Description of military: The armored spine of the armored corps of Vaegir is provided by the Clyde Cleveland-class Land Dreadnought. Pictured below:

Now you're getting the hang of it! I'm proud of you. One second. Let me wipe away this joyous tear. Okay, done. Now to continue. Now, you see, the TFW-NO-BF-1. It's light. Handle's adjustable for easy carrying, good for righties and lefties. Breaks down into four parts, undetectable by x-ray, ideal for quick, discreet interventions. A word on firepower. Titanium recharger, three thousand round clip with bursts of three to three hundred, and with the Replay button - another Vaegir invention - it's even easier. Their space force are actually their entire planets. They are bristling with guns, shields and thrusters. The mobile planet fleet is probably the dumbest shit ever, but fuck you, don't tell the space skunks what to do. Shut yer mouth when talking to a moufette. Bitch. Technological Overview: The TFW-NO-BF-1 is used for many different applications in Vaegir society. Need to turn the TV on? Shoot it. Need to turn it off? Shoot it again. Gotta open a jar of pickles? Shoot the darn thing. The TFW-NO-BF-1 is also the cornerstone of Vaegir democracy. Don't like the president? Shoot him. Three thousand times. With nets, freezing, and fire functions. Truly, the TFW-NO-BF-1 is a wondrous thing of many utilities. Cultural Overview: The Vaegir are a culture of useless consumers. They buy things in bulk and break them in bulk, which consequently leads to buying even more things. Everything is made to be disposable as possible. From cars, to nation sheets. Nothing is built to last among Skunk kind. Even their memes work on a "flavor of the month" basis, and are quite readily forgotten. Many make their ways into the hands of the Asteroid-dwelling Meme Scavengers, who continue to use the discarded memes for many years. These fearsome meme pirates strike fear into the hearts of all. Many a skunk song and dance have been written about these dastardly, but loveable, fiends. History: There was a little known program used to send skunks to space by the USSR. However, they not only lost the skunk rockets, but gamma radiation turned them into walking, talking skunk people that spray memes. However, most of them ended up dead, rather than dank skunk memer master race. It is a tradition among Vaegir kind to pour one out for the homies that didn't make it to Andromeda.

Azimuth Banned

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