Jem hadn’t had the chance to say anything further, though it probably was for the best. She switched her gaze between Sonny and Molly as she tugged her hand leading them away from the scene, and catching up a quick “Hey Addie.” to the Addison, who was waiting for them by the door. They finally entered Molly’s room, shutting the door behind them. Jem was now standing by the door, crossing her arms and rubbing her elbows while she looked at Molly “Soo..” she tried to smile, at her attempts to make the mood a little more cheerful.
Molly was feeling under pressure. She didn’t know what to tell her friend, but she had to speak with her, that much she knew.
”Sorry for that,” Molly huffed, frustrated. She let herself fall on her bed, feeling the springs give in under her weight. Molly covered her eyes with her forearms, sighing.
”Dunno what that was about. I… as you know, I’m clumsy, so I mistook Sonny’s room for my own. As you do,” Molly explained.
Then she sat up and tossed her wet t-shirt into the laundry basket. Her mother’s words rang through her head, telling her not to put wet clothes into the laundry, but she couldn’t care less that moment.
Looking at Jem, Molly hesitated, not sure what to say. She had something to say, didn’t she?
”Yeah so. I uh… I wanted to talk to you ‘cause… I’m feeling real shitty about the whole Sam thing. You know what happened, didn’t you? I bet he’s even told you his own side of the story,” Molly said with a shrug. ”I… I don’t think I can take this anymore, not havin’ my best mate. I need to explain to him why I did what I did, but I sure know I don’t have the balls to do so, right? It’s not like I’ve told anyone, that…” Molly trailed off, shutting herself up. She was rambling, wasn’t she.
“I know,” Jem merely said, smiling meekly while walking towards Molly’s bed and taking a seat at the edge next to her, a palm resting on the fabric and eyes looking down to hers. “It must’ve been difficult” she said, “but I think you did the right thing, otherwise it would’ve been unfair to Sam if you kept it on wouldn’t it.” this time trying to pick out the right words, to comfort her friend.
Molly nodded, holding back the urge to cut in and say that she never meant to end their friendship. From Jem's perspective, however, she thought that Molly was hiding the supposed attraction with Sonny. And now, Molly might have been wanting to get back with Sam again, which was kind of clear since it looked like she never really fully gotten over him, aside from losing a best friend.
Jem let out a sigh: “I know you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for Molly.” Her words came out much more genuine “And I know that whatever happens, everything will turn out alright in the end.” She rested her hand on Molly’s, smiling sincerely. “Now if you’re really going to explain things to Sam, face to face, no filter,” Jem pulled Molly upright, taking both her hands on her lap, clasping gently as she clears her throat. “How about we rehearse it. Now pretend I’m Sam.”
“Thanks. And I… uh… okay, I guess… here goes nothing,” Molly nodded, licking her lips. ”Sam, we need to talk. I uh… no, this feels so stupid. I can’t do this,” Molly whined, frustrated. ”’s not like we were datin’ or anything, it was just a benefits-sort-of thing,” Molly reminded, fidgeting with Jem’s fingers that were on her lap.
Jem gave her a look, ”Well, is that so?” Letting out a sarcastic tone as if she wasn’t entirely convinced that’s how she really feels, a tone which earned her a look from Molly. Her friend could be reading things in a different way, but the way she saw Sam coping with the ‘break up’ made her believe they cared for each other tremendously, and in a romantic level. Or it's just the dreamer in her that makes her read things in that direction. “Still, he’s still your best friend. Sooner or later you have to talk to him. Do you really want things to be like this forever between you two?” Jem shifted her seat, gently gripping her hands and raising a brow as if to continue their exercise. “Now. Where were we.”
Molly took a deep breath, staring at her own lap as if she were in a trance. Yes, Sam was her best friend. And she had to apologise, no matter how much the things he had said had hurt her. She had said some pretty nasty things too, after all.
“Right. So… Sam,” Molly began, feeling silly with the roleplay, ”I need to talk to you, privately. Yes, I said some dumb things and I’m sorry for that, but you said hurtful things too. So we’re even, and… Wait, no, I can’t go to him saying that! He’s gonna think I’m there to argue again. Fuck,” Molly cursed miserably. It was hard to admit her own flaws while not trying to drag someone else down.“No,no, that’s a good start.” Jem said trying to ease her.
”Should you start this time?” Molly asked, frustrated. Seeing that her friend was struggling, she took the initiative. Jem cleared her throat, taking a moment to get into character. She may not have been that good of an actor, just ask Richie, but for Molly’s sake, god knows she’d do her best.
“Mo” She said in her best Sam Costigan swagger, hair brushing, lip biting and all. Also considering the possibility that Sam might still harbor some resentment towards her. “What the heck do you want.”
It kind of intimidated Molly to hear Jem’s last words, whereas the first words she said in such a voice almost made her laugh. “Sam,” Molly acknowledged, even though it wasn’t really Sam at all, but she did imagine greeting him like that when they’d talk. “I’m here to apologise. I was a jerk,” Molly explained, keeping the insisting part of her that wanted to say that Sam had also been a jerk inside of her. “And uh… I missed you. A lot. And yeah. I’m sorry for being a git.” The blonde bowed her head in embarrassment. Only imagining talking to him made her feel ashamed of her behaviour.
Jem was so happy at how Molly handled that well. It must have been difficult for the girl to come up with words under such strong feelings. Jem couldn’t imagine herself, to have someone consider a best friend end up on such terms.
“Aww” she replied and still in her Sam persona, abruptly coming back to the role after realizing she was going out of character. “Okay. Cool.” she said in a deep, Sam-ish voice, also adding some of his signature hand gestures. “I missed you too Mo. And uh, sorry for being a jerk too.” Of course she didn’t know how Sam would really react on the situation but, Jem has faith that things will be ok between them once they talk it out, it may take some time to heal but who knows. She could always talk to Sam if all else fails, for both their sakes.
“Is that really what he’d say?” Molly asked doubtfully, breaking character too. She wasn’t feeling very confident that Sam would just apologise and admit to missing her. I suppose Jem knew that, too, but was just trying to be gentle on her.
Jem rubbed her palms into Molly’s in a kindly gesture “Maybe. Maybe not.” she shrugs. “You have to find out either way. But just remember whatever happens I’ll stay by you. You know, be that airbag that saves you from a violent blow.” she said humorously, giving her the assurance she just might need to get through this.
Getting back into it, Molly felt the oncoming ramble bubbling on her lips.
“There is something else, too, uh… Sam,” she said, looking at Jem from under her brow. Jem immediately channeled her inner Sam. “I feel like I need to explain myself to him… I- I mean to you, so I’m gonna. I really didn’t mean to end our friendship, it was all a misunderstanding. It was the sex- no, I mean like… the sex was good, amazing even, that wasn’t the problem. The problem was, is…” Molly trailed off, swallowing. Was she really going to go through with this? Sam was supposed to be the first to know, but Jem was here too, and… “You can’t tell anyone, ok? Promise you won’t,” Molly insisted with a sudden change into a hushed, vulnerable tone, now talking straight to Jem, not an imaginary Sam.
Now, Jem leaned in a little bit closer to her, curious and a little bit worried at what she was about to say. “What is it?” It came out more Jem like, rather than Sam. “Promise to me,” Molly repeated.
“I promise.”
Happy with that answer, Molly took a deep breath. She was ready to do a leap of faith. “You know, I’m not embarrassed. It’s not that I don’t know who I am - I do, now. I just don’t want the whole world to know, not when I’m still figuring it out. Well. That sounds counterintuitive, but the point is, I’m just comfortable being like I am now. Not everyone needs to know. Annnnd I’m rambling. Again. Bugger,” Molly cursed, inhaling since she was quite out of breath after saying that all in one mouthful. She squeezed Jem’s hands apologetically.
Jem was more confused rather than enlightened at whatever Molly was trying to tell her. “Molly,” she returned her squeeze. “It’s ok. Just say it” she returned her with a warm gaze, as if telling her everything is alright despite whatever she had to say.
“So you know how there are those shows where the protagonist thinks they’re like, normal like everyone else, but then they realise they have this super power or something and they realise they’ve been different all along? Well… I’m kinda like that, but with… but with guys,” Molly ended, knowing full well she probably didn’t make any damn sense. That was the worst metaphor anyone had ever uttered, Molly concluded in her mind. “Not like being normal is bad. Actually, no - I worded that so bad, sorry. What I’m trying to say is that I couldn’t have been having sex with Sonny since, well… I don’t really like him like that. His… ‘species’ as a whole, so to speak.” Well, now she sounded even weirder. Why couldn’t she just say it out loud, goddammit?
“Wait so you’re saying,” Jem paused “you don’t like, Sam, in a way that explains why you couldn't have sex with Sonny, because they're basically...” she processed that info for a good couple of seconds, her expression was, more or less, positively surprised. “Ohhhhh.”
Truth be told, Jem wasn’t expecting that. But looking back, piecing together a convoluted puzzle into one very clear image, it actually made sense. Everything was now making sense. “OH!” she said, but this time just a tad bit enthusiastic.
Molly’s eyes brightened. It felt like a heavy weight being lifted from her chest. “So it’s… okay with you?” she asked anyway, just to make sure. A tentative smile was tugging her lips. She felt more free than she had ever before.
“Okay? Why are you even asking me that, of course!” Jem said in a sunny demeanour, while gently tapping Molly’s arm “Though, honestly I never did consider that possibility, but it surely explains a lot of things.” she winked, “That doesn’t change the fact that you’re still my friend, and that you have to fix things with Sam.”
“...Yeah, yes, you’re right. I still have to do that. But… thanks. This is too bloody weird,” Molly let out a breathless laughter. She looked at her lap, noticing the clothes she was still wearing. “Did you wanna help me pick clothes?” she asked then, changing the subject. “I think after this I can try to sort out things with Sam. Thank you for being my friend, Jem.”
“You know you can always count on me for anything, Molly.” Jem has always been out to help anyone she hold dearest, some may find it overbearing but in the deepest hollows of her imperfect heart she’s always been genuine, in everything she does. “Of course! ”Jem’s nodded at Molly’s request to help her get dressed, her wide eyes glinted as she perked up from her seat excitedly, and gone over to Molly’s closet, searching through Molly’s stuff. “Now let’s see what you have here… Ohh this looks cute. What do you think?”She presented a cute summer dress before her, “How come I never see you wear one of these?”
Molly chuckled, ducking her head. “Oh that one! I don’t ever seem to find the right occasion for it, it’s true… Even now I’m afraid it might get dirty when people party. So maybe something more casual?” the blonde suggested, pulling out a long, faded orange skirt from the wardrobe. Then she pulled out a knotted black t-shirt, holding them up with a smile. “This could work!”
Jem a regarding look, at the dress "Hmm are you sure?" she said "Well that certainly looks more you!" Jem threw the dress back in the closet, and helped her friend get dressed. In some way she was glad that Molly trusts her enough to come out to her, and hopes that their talk in some way would help her gain the confidence to face her troubles, with or without her.
