Name: Alex Mathison
Age: 22
Gender: Male
Outward Persona: Outwardly, Alex could be seen as the quiet one, a faint smile always touching his lips. When spoken, his words hold great gravity and are seldom spoken without thought. He is quick to help those in need. In his spare time, Alex is usually found alone, in quiet contemplation and self reflection or practicing Tai Chi.
Inward Persona: Despite his cool outwards appearance, Alex's inner world is in a desperate state of self loathing, filled with burning insecurities. Every action he takes is shadowed by overwhelming doubt, forever convinced he'll fail whatever task (however trivial) he undertakes.
Although not afraid of death, his own self disbelief means that he fights with fear of failing, and such doubts cause hesitation, which could one day lead to his very demise.
His worst fear is for his own doubts and fears to cause the death of others.
Likes: Random acts of kindness/selflessness, meditating, practicing Tai Chi, being alone, reading and animals.
Dislikes: Large groups, selfishness, evil in all forms, people suffering, himself.
Clothes: (Gunna see what everyone else does before deciding x3)
Appearance:
Prior History: Alex always felt a compassionate need to help others. Growing up, he always tried his best to help whomever he could. Unfortunately, this lead to alot of the more manipulative people taking advantage of him. This slowly lead to bullying and alienation. People knew that because Alex was so kind, he wouldn't say or do anything if anyone were to treat him unfairly, which only served to exacerbate the situation. Despite all this, Alex continued to help those in need and even the people who wronged him, forgiving and forgetting without a second thought. All this lead to all the insecurities and self hatred that burns deep within Alex.
He never mentioned any of this to his family, who seemed oblivious to his torture, believing his small smile perhaps too easily.
At the age of 18, Alex heard of a place with people of a similar mind - others to dedicated themselves to helping others. He felt his new purpose call to him. He explained his intentions to his family, who supported him fully.
As soon as he could, Alex made his way out into the world, to find the monastary. He explained his situation to the monks and felt a bright, new hope blossom within himself when they welcomed him with open arms. The monks seemed to have far more perception than that of his family, sensing the doubt that seemed to seethe from him as if a thick fog. They taught him their ways and soon with the help of meditation and Tai Chi, his own hatred began to slowly subside to managable levels. Yet it still remains and if he cannot overcome it in times of need, it could cost him dearly.