Pony slipped into the hollow she shared with Lucien, quickly shedding excess clothing and snuggling close to his turned back. It was a bad idea to sleep in too much clothing in the caverns; too much warmth and a person would begin to sweat, filling the clothes with moisture and making it all the colder when they got out of bed. Lucien was still awake but said nothing to her. He simply stared into the darkness that was their shared corner of the world. Pony stroked his bare back gently and felt her own tears start to well up. She knew what was coming, sooner or later.
"You're going to leave me. Aren't you?" she whispered to him sadly. "She's back and you don't need me anymore."
Still, Lucien said nothing. What could he say? She was right. Yet it hurt him even to admit that much to himself, for he was fond of her. He also owed her a great deal since she was the only one in the Colony who kept him going after he had to accept the inevitable acknowledgement of Cassie's loss.
"I know I'm not as smart as everyone else. And I know that... people feel weird around me. You and Cassie were my only real friends. When she was gone, you were the only one I could turn to. I've never had anyone else. And I tried to be there for you, too. I do love you, Lucien. Just like I loved Cassie. Love her, I guess I should say now, huh?" She leaned her forehead against his back and closed her eyes. Pony felt she at least had to make the attempt. "I'm still willing, you know. Remember?"
Lucien remembered. Oh, how he remembered. Months before the planned wedding date, Pony had made her suggestion to the happy couple, a suggestion that both shocked and intrigued him at the same time even as he realized that it would never work out. And not just because Pony talking about it made Cassie incredibly uncomfortable. The girl meant well and had been sincere in what she was offering, but she couldn't see the stresses it would put not only on the marriage but their friendship as well! Pony had wanted (from Lucien's point of view) to 'share' Cassie; Cassie had seen it as wanting to share Lucien. It hadn't set well with either of them, and when gently rejected the blonde girl had attempted to correct both of their viewpoints: she wanted them to share her! Pony had wanted to be subservient to them both because she could not think of anyone she loved or trusted better than the pair of them! Still... unacceptable.
"Cassie would never go for it," he murmured, "And I'm... I can't be that kind of person anymore, Pony. Not with her back again."
Pony sighed and pouted. "But you did it so well, Lucien. Who will I go to if you leave me? I don't have anyone else, only the two of you." She bit her lower lip and then braved another option. "If you decide to leave... and you and she get back together... I want something. Something that will last, Lucien. Please? You owe me that much, yes? Something so I won't be alone and will still have something of you."
Puzzled as to what she was getting at, Lucien rolled to his back and looked at her over his shoulder, brow furrowed. "Pony, what are you-"
"I want a child, Lucien. I want your child. Give me that and... and I won't stand in your way with Cassie. I'll even help where I can." In the darkness, he could still make out the shining tears that ran down her elfin cheeks. Pony's body was shaking with the effort to contain her own sadness at the recent turn of events. Putting a hand to his lips, she shook her head. "Don't... don't answer now. It's too late and it's been a hard day for everyone and no one is thinking clearly right now. I'll give you whatever time and space you need, you know that. Right now, just... think about it and get some sleep, my love." With that, she buried her face against his shoulder and said nothing more as she fell into a grief ridden sleep.
Lucien, still shocked at the request, could only continue to stare at her. Life, as it often does, just became all the more complicated for him.
*****
Come breakfast time, Lucien was nowhere to be seen. Pony, however, sat by herself in a far corner of the hall with a small bowl of oatmeal and a half cup of juice. Everyone else studiously ignored her, as always. The girl's eyes were puffy and swollen as though she had been crying, but her face lit up with a small smile at the sight of Cassie and Jacob. Biting her lower lip in nervousness, she gave a small wave to Cassie to indicate there was space by her should she chose it. She had only had the vaguest idea where Lucien had gone so early in the morning. Left to her own devices, Pony was at a loss of what to do and felt incredibly lonely.