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<Snipped quote by Nimda>
... I just want to exist as I am without causing you pain. It seems its all I do is hurt you just by being me...
The truth is... every time youve asked to help, youve only gotten hurt. Wether it be a shocking truth, someone trying to kill the both of us, people trying to drive a wedge in between us... i want better for you.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
You say I'm not thinking you? Blue, I'm the whole reason you got a fresh start. I've been keeping the entirety of the Tier Five off your back and risking loosing everyone close to me because I got close to you. A select few of them want you dead, permanently. and they would be the ones with the means to do it. A majority of my friends hate me now because i sided with you over them. Ive bought you a TON of gifts. I took you on several trips. I always do my best to text you and I havent missed a good morning text in over a year, disregarding the maybe month that I wasi n a coma and under your care, and you know I was right there with tou that entire time. When I woke up, my first thought was you. I think of you every day.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
Weve talked about immortality a total of three times, and my stance on it hasnt changed. What you want is me to side with you on it and give up. Everything else, like the kids situation and me lying? Completely understandable why you'd be angry, rightfully so. Getting mad at me becuase I don't want to live forever? That just feels shallow. I feel set up in this situation to where no matter what, I won't be able to make you happy. I don't like fighting. I don't liek arguments. What I want to do is come home and see the one person in this entire damn existence who loves me. I wanna do the dishes after we eat a well cooked meal together that we both enjoyed. I want to fold fresh towels from the dryer after we cleaned our home together. I wanna see your beautiful smile in the sunlight as we hike outside on our favorite trail. What your asking is beyond a relationship. That kind of power comes iwth responsibility to use it wisely. I dont want that.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
That has nothing to do with what I just said. Now you're just yelling at me.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
And yet when I do, you're gonna get mad at me for not choosing it after the hell you had to experience with it yourself?
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
I never said it wasnt hell to you. But I also didnt ask for you to be immortal. I didnt count it as a requirement. I'd love you equally either way, and wouldnt question your final decision.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
No, you were well within your right to speak your pieceo n the matter, as was I. But just as you have your boundaries that you dont want crossed, as do I. This is definitely one of them. The concept of immortality is like a nightmare to me. Its my idea of what ai imagine hell to look like. Watching wveryone around you leave but you can't? Im sorry, but thats a hard no for me.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
Immortality is a no go for me. It just isnt somethign I want to do. A choice to live functionally forever is appaling to me. Even if its something you're used to, immortality would force me to accept a whole new way of thinking, it would change everything. Living with the aspect of life being finite drives me to accomplish what I can while I'm alive. Is a huge driving force behind my motives. Living forever would defeat that purpose.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
I would stil lrather live out my days and end when I'm supposed to. I wasnt born immortal, and dont plan on ending it that way.
<Snipped quote by Nimda>
Im also not immortal, and wouldnt ask for it. Its both a blessing and a curse. I can't imagine the pain youve been put through. Being functionally immortal must be tiring.