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    1. Phloem 11 yrs ago

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GEEETTTTTTT DUNKED ON



[ 19 - they/them - ISTP - GMT+8 ]

this is phloem and i'm literally the worst
...forreal tho hmu if you wanna rp

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The week flew by quickly and soon enough, it was the day of the picnic. James didn't even try to make anything for the potluck, but he had a good reason. He wasn't the best cook, and that was putting it gently. Once, he had even managed to burn a pot of water that he was boiling. He didn't know how it happened, but it did. Whenever he cooked, everyone around him was instantly put into mortal danger, including himself. So, for the good of the general public, he decided the best course of action would be to not attempt cooking ever again. He did, however, bring along a tub of freshly made cookies from the bakery in town and some drinks. It wasn't much, but he had something else up his sleeve. James managed to sneak in bottles of beer over the course of three days. Nothing too alcoholic, of course, everyone getting completely wasted would only tip the teachers off. But the picnic was sort of a party, and a party just wasn't complete without some booze.

Thus, James began his work of transferring the beer into the multiple coolers scattered across the area, burying the bottles under piles of ice and soft drinks. He was suddenly reminded of the Metal Gear games he played as a kid, hiding behind corners and stuff like that. Except in this case, he was Solid Snake and the teachers were the roaming guards out to foil his plans. He didn't actually do any ninja-like maneuvers, but this was the closest he was gonna get. Once his task was complete, he dusted his hands off for a job well done. As long as no one found out and/or tattled on him, this was going to go great.

Heading over to where the picnic table was, James managed to make off with one or two of the cupcakes when no one was looking. He gave himself a brief once over to make sure there weren't any crumbs that would incriminate him of stealing any baked goods before the picnic even officially started. So far so good, his loose-fitting Black Flag tank top and board shorts seemed to be void of any evidence that he could see. But for good measure, since his eyesight probably shouldn't be trusted, he gave them another few swipes with his hand. Noticing someone, he had to squint a bit to actually see who it was. When it turned out to be Acacia, he was just about to call out a greeting, at least until he noticed her brother who was coincidentally also the Vice-Principal watching over her like a hawk. Max was there with Acacia, too. To be honest, James was actually pretty impressed that anyone even dared to strike up a conversation with Acacia when Hayden was around. He knew how over-protective the man could get.

Deciding that he was probably better off avoiding Acacia for the moment if he didn't fancy becoming the target of Mr. Hawthorne's wrath, he strolled over to one of the coolers, pulling out a beer and taking a long swig, though he quickly put it back before anything caught him doing so. Right after, James caught a glimpse of some brightly coloured objects in the distance, and decided to head over to investigate. When he got closer, he realised that the objects were actually many different sorts of water guns. He also noticed that August kid was there as well, probably planning one of his infamous pranks again.

"Hey, Marco! What're you up to this time, eh?"


Seth wasn't really an outdoorsy kind of person. The searing hot sun, the grass and dirt -- not a big fan. Which is probably something quite surprising, seeing as he was in the Scouts as a kid and he spent a good part of his time in high school at football practice. None of which was even his choice to make. Most of the time, his father had just signed him up for everything without so much as a warning beforehand. Seth didn't really like any of the stuff he had to join but when his father told him how proud he was of him, it was all worth it. But after years of doing what his father, not what he wanted, he had decided it was time for a change. So here he was, a Literature teacher at Caelbury Academy for the rich, gifted, or both. And more recently, none of the above.

A shout broke Seth out of his thoughts as a stray water balloon narrowly missed him. Another shout, this time an apology, and the culprit was nowhere to be seen. Deciding that actually moving around would render him a less susceptible target, he got up and headed for the picnic table where most people seemed to be gathered. Also, the other Literature teacher from Monday... Celia, he recalled was there as well. Since they were teaching the same subject, he assumed that they were going to be working pretty closely together. So there was no harm in getting to know her better. At least he didn't think there was. As long as he didn't horribly embarrass himself in front of everyone (which would traumatise him for life), it should be just fine. He had seen her around school a few times in the past week, but he didn't really get to have an actual conversation with her just yet.

As he approached, Seth looked around and noticed that most of the students and teachers were wearing clothes that were actually fitting for a hot summer day. He suddenly felt rather dowdy in his own outfit; a grey button-up, with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, classic blue jeans, and a pair of "mandals". His sister had told him what they were called, but he didn't really see the difference from normal sandals. He supposed it was a fashion thing, which was definitely not something he was too well-versed in.

"Uh, hi." Seth started when he was in earshot. Eloquent as always, Seth, he thought to himself, inwardly facepalming, but pushed on, anyway.

"Hey, uh, Seth. From the teachers' lounge?" He reintroduced himself. From the teachers' lounge? Did you really just say that? Way to stick your foot in your mouth. Really, I mean it. It's amazing how you always manage to do that. Seth's internal monologues had to be one of his greatest flaws apart from the uncanny ability to immediately drift off into his thoughts if left alone for 10 seconds. Nevertheless, he continued.

"I just thought that maybe we should, you know, get to know each other a little better? Since we teach the same thing and all. And uh, do you need help with those?" Seth pointed to the plate of sandwiches in her hand.
Sorry, really short posts. Just wanted to get something up before I went to bed. :U


"Max!" James greeted cheerily, yanking his glasses off as soon as he identified who the newcomer was in one swift movement, a wide grin on his face. Thankfully, the school administration didn't decide to shove him together with someone he hated; which it was known to do on occasion. It was kind of like russian roulette, either you got what you wanted or you died. Okay, so it wasn't the best simile. But that was besides the point. Getting up, he covered the distance between him and his new roommate in a few long strides. James pulled him into sort of a semi-hug that couldn't have lasted more than a second, ending it with a friendly slap on the back. "It's good to see you, mate. How've you been?"

"Oh right! I called dibs on the room on the left, by the way. I mean, I've already unpacked and everything. So yeah, hope you don't mind. The rooms are pretty much exactly the same, anyway." James made a dismissive gesture with his hand at the aforementioned room. Surreptitiously slipping the pair of glasses into back into his coat pocket, he brought up the note that was pasted on the room's front door.

"They're having the picnic again on Sunday, apparently. Don't know if you saw the note on the door, but yeah." James shrugged and absentmindedly ran his fingers through his hair. The annual picnic was a thing they had every year; as implied by the fact that it was called the annual picnic. Usually, it was just lots of eating and catching up with friends after the holiday break but this year, it seems there was going to be something new -- a dunk tank. It was pretty unexpected, but James honestly wasn't surprised; the Student Council had a way with coming up with something new every year so nobody ever got sick of the same stuff happening over and over again.

"Anyway," James started, "We should probably go find the others when you're done unpacking."


When he heard someone new walking into the teacher's lounge, Seth made it a point to studiously avoid making eye contact with whoever it was. He was basically trying to blend into the background like some sort of oversized, strangely humanoid chameleon. The last thing he needed right now was for even more people to see him faffing about whilst looking like a person close to death. Honestly, his coffee dependency was quickly spiralling out of control. Stirring his cup of miserably lukewarm coffee until the last of the sugar dissolved, Seth was interrupted when he spotted a hand out of the corner of his eye.

Deciding that simply ignoring it would be a rude and hilariously stupid thing to do, he looked up from the coffee. Standing in front of him was a blonde woman, maybe about twenty-five years old if he had to guess. He had no idea who she was, well, at least up until she introduced herself. The name was vaguely familiar, if his memory was correct, she used to teach literature at Caelbury before taking a break because of personal reasons. Abruptly remembering that he was probably meant to shake the hand that was offered to him, he quickly set the coffee down and shook it.

"Ah, right. I'm Seth. Seth Kabhsenuf." He introduced himself, even managing to muster what he hoped was a polite smile. Though he was pretty sure it was nothing compared to hers. How anyone could so chirpy in the morning would remain forever beyond his comprehension. "And, uh, we haven't. Met, that is. I only started teaching here last year. I heard you teach Literature too?"


"Do you have your glasses on?"

"...Yes?"

"For God's sake, James. Put them on!"

"Alright, alright! I'm doing it right now!" James retorted and set his phone aside for a moment, fishing out a brand new pair of spectacles he had gotten over the break from his coat pocket. Somehow, his eyesight had gotten worse and the old ones just didn't suffice anymore. Which was probably something he should've seen coming, since his glasses were usually left in a forgotten corner to collect dust. And his nearsightedness wasn't about to go away just by ignoring it. He first noticed the change for the worse while he was out with a couple of buddies back in his hometown on his last week of vacation. They decided it would be absolutely hilarious to shepherd James straight into a solid brick wall which he swore had magically apparated out of thin air. It was, for a time, rather hilarious, because truly, there was nothing funnier than taking advantage of a friend's blind (excuse the pun) faith in those around him. James snorted derisively to himself. He really was as blind as a bat. It was like in Scooby-Doo, when Velma drops her glasses and is out of commission for two hours. Except in this case, he was Velma.

"There! I've got them on. Happy now? Or do I have to send you a selfie to prove it?"

"No, that won't be necessary." the tinny, female voice emanating from James' phone declared. His aunt had made it a point to call at least five times per day in the three he'd been here. Which was tolerable enough at first but quickly grew torturous, especially since it was the same questions every single time. He knew that it was just because she worried about him but in all honesty, it was starting to get a little out of hand.

"Did you remember to bring your suitcase?"

"Yes, this is the sixth time you're asking me. Anyway, I've gotta go, don't want to be late, right? Okay, love you, bye." James quickly hung up before his aunt went on any further. Taking a moment to psych himself up, he rounded the corner to enter the school compound with his guitar slung across his back and his suitcase wheeled behind him. James made a beeline for the dormitory building, hoping to make it to his assigned room before anyone spotted him. Stepping into the building, he made quick work of collecting his keys and unpacking in his room. Thankfully, whoever his roommate was, they weren't here yet, so they wouldn't be around to see him with his really high degreed glasses on. On the bright side, he thought to himself, at least this pair didn't look like they belonged to someone's grandfather. But all in all, they were still pretty bad. Now he was going to look like a pretentious hipster douchebag instead of an eighty year old man, which really wasn't much of an improvement. He obviously didn't think it through when he bought them. Flopping rather unceremoniously onto one of the sofas in the living room, James decided to wait and see who he'd be sharing his room with for the rest of the year before doing anything else.


Seth was, most decidedly, not having the best day. And that was putting it gently. First, he had to turn his entire apartment upside down in a search for his in search of the a decent looking jacket. Which he didn't even manage to find, and he ended up having to settle for a ratty, old jacket of grey tweed that he'd owned since his college days. Secondly, his car broke down. Maybe the battery died or the engine overheated. He didn't know how it happened, but it happened. And finally, to put the icing on the cake, the cabbie that drove him to Caelbury had to be the single most xenophobic asshole to walk this earth. Seth was actually impressed that the cabbie was able to drive him all the way to Caelbury without blowing a gasket. But that was probably because he wasn't about to say no to money. A bout of annoyed coughing shook him from his thoughts and he noticed that after what seemed like an eternity, he was finally at the school. And of course, the cabbie was none too patiently waiting for him to pay his fare. Despite Seth's disdain for the taxi driver, he fell over himself, checking every coat pocket, every cranny of his wallet to scrounge up the exact amount in coins and rumpled notes, even spewing out a few hasty apologies when he realized he was taking far too long. 'Well, then. There goes my dignity.' he thought to himself, inwardly facepalming. Handing over the money, Seth quickly gathered up his belongings and hopped off, wisely ignoring the dirty look that the cabbie shot him when he slammed the door shut.

Taking a deep breath, Seth started to head towards the main school building. The grounds were kept in pristine condition, as always and some students were already starting to arrive. He noticed a few familiar faces, some his colleagues, other his students, but he decided against it. He still hadn't had his morning coffee yet in his rush to get here on time and would prefer to not look like a corpse in front of the general public. Despite having taught here for a year already, he sometimes still found the school compound difficult to navigate, but thankfully, the route to the teacher's lounge was one that he was familiar with. He took a short moment to inspect himself in the reflection of a window. Tweed jacket, with matching grey trousers, white dress shirt, navy blue tie and a pair of Ralph Lauren wingtips. His shoes were probably the only expensive things in his outfit, unlike some of the other teachers here who came to school decked out head-to-toe in branded goods.

Deciding that he probably shouldn't stare at his reflection for too long, lest some passersby think he was some sort of narcissistic freak, he entered the building through the main doors. The very thought of freshly made coffee put a spring in his step and he quickened his pace. Soon enough, he had reached his destination. Pushing the door open, he spotted the coffee machine. The coffee machine here was a thing of wonder, all sleek lines and complex buttons that looked like it was designed by Tony Stark. Unlike the coffee machine in the previous school he taught in; it had been in the ground-floor break-room (which was actually a repurposed walk-in supply cupboard, with just enough room for the sofa and nothing else). It wasn't nearly as well equipped. It was old. And cheap. And it produced the most appalling coffee Seth has ever had the misfortune of drinking, including the swill he drank at university that came out of the instant coffee dispenser where all the cockroaches lived. This coffee machine produced the most delicious, wonderful coffee that met even the most exacting standards.

So it was to his complete and utter dismay when he discovered the coffee was lukewarm. It was clear that someone had been here before him. It was also clear that he had failed to notice the three other people in the room in his search of a cup of hot coffee right up until he spun around to face them. "Oh god. Sorry, I didn't even... see you guys there." said, making some sort of apologetic hand gesture. "Just here to get some coffee." Sluggishly, he turned back ground to pour himself a cup of the caffeinated beverage, dropping in two sugarcubes instead of the usual one. He was gonna need it.
I'll post in the IC tomorrow, although technically, it'd be today. Because oh god I've been out the whole day and it's like 1:30 am where I live so I am literally about to fall asleep with my eyes open. Okay bye I hope this is actually coherent.
Here's my second character in case anyone wants to take a look. Still a WIP and I'm planning on changing some stuff soon. Also, this may or may not be turning into a sausage party.

Done! I think.

I'm gonna to make a second character since everyone's doing it. And then I'll post in the IC.
What's going on here?

Oh god, I actually forgot contact lenses were a thing. School pretty much turned my brain into mush. Now to come up with some shoddy excuse as to why James doesn't wear them. :U
Seems like it. xD
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