It was her mother’s bed. It was old, not rotting or filled with bed bugs, just… Hard and pokey. The pillows had lost all life to them and just stayed there, and somewhere in the room was some kind of snoring. Alex had her eyes closed, pretending to sleep, or maybe she was asleep, it was hard to tell. She woke up with a discomfort in her leg, a numbness, only to find out she had left a needle in there. She grumbled a little and then got up, moving lethargically.
It was hard. She shut her eyes and it was all just a blank darkness that filled the space. Everywhere she looked, spaces were filled with creatures that moved in her mind, except they were devoid of the light, of the colour only she could give to them, and they spoke to her, begging her for more. “What do you ever give me in return?” She challenged out loud, shuffling off the bed on her feet. When she turned around, visible to her open eyes now, she could see it, even if it was for only a second, her visions reaching out to touch her.
She tilted her head to the side, barely able to breathe. She knew they weren’t human, they weren’t even real for one thing, but to reach out… She coughed out, a bit of blood in the spit that oozed down her face. She moved to the bathroom, hating the taste of the water as she managed to brush her teeth, comb her hair. She had a date today. Everyone was getting restless.
She went down to the basement, behind eight locked doors and three different sets of securities. When she walked down there – though it was pitch black, she teared up because of the bright colours in the room. She knew which ones were ready, but she felt them all out anyway, as if she was making them better. That’s all she wanted to do, make things better.
Something buzzed and dragged her out of her colours, the bright light disappearing, and she looked at a little source of light buzzing on the ground. “Peter.” She said, as the phone managed to answer itself as if to her command. She didn’t need to look behind her – she knew he was there. It. She. Alex didn’t care. Fucking thing was always behind her.
“Heya, hon, it’s me. How are you?”
“It’s too early in the morning for this. What are you even thinking?” Alex didn’t say much else, but she listened on as Peter fumbled and said he needed several batches now.
“Look, it’s my brother. You know what he’s like.” Rapist, violent, hipster barbarian. “H-hey. You there?”
“You’re going to have to give me more money this time,” she said, sighing as a need to explain herself rose up. “The electricity bill’s rolled in again, and some other stuff. And I… Need something.” She shut her eyes, tilting her head back, everything went blank for a second as she felt it behind her back. A hand caressing her spine almost.
“Consider it all taken care of,” Peter said. He always said that, and he always did what he said too. Rare quality for a man like him. “And how much do you need?”
How much did she need? Did she even know how much of the drugs she had left? She gagged at the taste of blood again, knowing nothing matched the high anymore. She half looked back at the emptiness behind her. “Naah. I think I’m going to… Do less for a while. I’ll call you though if I change my mind.”
“Ah that’s great. I could definitely come over and…” The thought of Peter in bed felt like someone walking over her grave, like she was up to more mischief than she should be, than she was allowed. She grinned to herself, imagining, in detail, though he wasn’t very good, the thought of him naked, fumbling around with his body, his hands on her breasts, trying to grope them like they were actually there as he…
“Alex?”
“I don’t like that place. Can’t we do the regular place?”
“We’d get into trouble with Sheriff Luntz. Remember how Gary said we shouldn’t really let him know because he wouldn’t be happy with stuff like this?” Alex grunted. The bar had a long alley right behind it, and nobody went there. It wasn’t the cleanest place either, not that she minded that.
The stuff was good, she knew. She had never sampled it herself though. A weird taste in her mouth if she did, and not the nice kind either. She turned around to look at the back of the house, but what she felt wasn’t comforting at all. They weren’t just in her room now, at the back of her mind. She was sure they were coming out. At least he did.
She twirled a bit, wanting to see him and ask him a question, but she felt stupid, worse than she generally did, and she walked down, hands in her pockets as she carried her ‘handbag’.
“Oh darling look!” A voice got her out of her mind, and she skipped to see Mrs. Anton. Mrs. Anton gave her a brownie, which Alex munched down as she stared at the garden. Mrs. Anton specifically pointed out at the rose plant, which was blooming quite well. “You’ve given it life again!”
“Thank you, ma’am, it looks quite beautiful…” And for a second the garden filled with light, the end of the rose petals twinkling as Alex ran her fingers gently over the side. She finished her brownie, her eyes wide as just beyond the garden, as it ended into the pavement, the dark shadow, worse now with all this brightness around, stood patiently. “I have to go now, but I will definitely come by later for tea.”
Alex walked down the path, taking the smallest corners that she could find, away from the light, though it was tiresome to even walk to three miles down to the – what was it called again? She only remembered the name when she saw it, _The Water of Life_. She saw Peter there too, who waved her down and then took a wad of notes out of his pocket and dropped it into a handbag that looked exactly like hers, switching the bag.
He leaned in to kiss her. It smelt as though he hadn’t brushed in a week, and Alex shuffled back when she felt something pull her towards the bar. She didn’t need to look to see the shadow was there, standing, except now with its back to her, as if it was looking into the place with wide eyes.
“You’re a life saver. I’ll call you, ‘cause if I don’t leave now…” Alex waved her hands, looking down as the sun came out, ready to get out of there, waiting for her _friend_ to get ready so she could leave.