The Gingerbread Man

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Well, I think it would still be fun if Protege would help out, even though she is not obliged to in any way.

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Woo! I like it so far, I'm proud of that sheet. I REALLY need to see these other CSes though, after some short glances before I straddled the 'Write and get interrupted train' and they were pretty interesting.

Also I assume your colleague is providing art for the characters? I only ask because of the part about not bringing photos meant other than specifically for the character.

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Welp, I'm an uncultured American and I don't know these things XD

Added two more paragraphs to describe her years at the Academy, adding and then subtracting her first love as well. Might as well put in a little life experience while I'm at it ^^

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Well then I should increase her age a bit. That doesn't even facilitate two years in college.

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

In that case, how long does it take for Moderators Academy?

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Want me to edit some of those details in there or are we cool?

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Yeah, that could work. She'd still be healing from her self inflicted loneliness so at the start of the RP she'd still be in a weird mental state. The weird mental state is needed because one that's interesting to write for and two because she needs to not know what's helping her heal, just that she's healing.

I like that idea, thanks a lot! :D

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

That is actually a bit unsettling. I can certainly expand upon that. Some options...

She got addicted to the cheap thrills of academy simulations (Which would probably be real life still but with remote controlled and/or dummy viruses)

Untraceable drugs helped her forget, thus not immediately leaving the academy

She actually got a good feeling about being able to help someone in a tangible way (Least likely for me to take her up on)

She constantly imagines that it's her father she's training to beat down, letting out pent up aggression slowly over academy years. (She probably has some violently brushed paintings at the old dorm)

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I'm having a bit of trouble with this one, actually. I believe bitterness to be a paralytic so I'm unsure how to work this out. I'm going to give myself some more time to think it over I think. But I'll leave the options above anyway because I like spitballing, it's healthy for a would-be writer.

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

The spindly thing is intentional. I mean for her to be both intelligent and athletic but still be a realistic member of the B-Team. Thus my original thought on that was 'she did it out of boredom'. I made it a bit more sad than that though. She joined up during a very damaged mental state that was elongated by locking herself away from everyone else so really, it's meant to not make sense. I mean, try locking yourself away with nothing but some random paintings and abstract sculptures for four years and see how sound your decision making skills become. I also believe that she can realistically stay with the B-Team seeing as how that is the way she reintegrates herself into society.

Even though I am being a bit defensive about it, I would definitely be willing to make some minor changes to it to have it be more believable if you are willing to help me out in some small way. I'm a bit exhausted from writing that much so my brain has sort of melted.

EDIT: Also thanks for complimenting the shield thing, I enjoyed the idea myself ^^

Moderators - The Virtual Abyss

Wait, somebody else has a shield? Should I change mine? It's kind of an easy fix, I didn't really care about the weapon choice anyway. The closing statement of the weapon description is the main reason why I picked it :/