Mammon said
-what you wrote-
i think that's what i was trying to say.
when river died, i didn't feel angry or resentful about him killing himself. i didn't know why he did it but if that was his choice then i'm glad he's at peace. the last thing i wanted was for him to keep living with so much pain/or whatever.
some people think they can't be helped. i didn't think anyone could help me and i didn't see the point. i was tired of reaching out to people that weren't interested in helping me, and i felt like i was bringing everyone down when i brought it up.