I'll just address everyone at once. For one that wording for Jazzy's concern was my fault actually. It's really just him using overwhelming force to the point that in begins to damage the body and then things begin to break and what not under the force, not pressure my bad on that one. And actually it does state that these things do take a lot out of him for whoever said it should, if not I accidentally put the wrong draft in, but I'm pretty sure it does. As for moving himself around that wouldn't take much out of him it would just take concentration and skill. As for air pressure that one was supposed to say physical touch to damage a target with it, and if over used might even kill him. And to further clarify for you Jazzy it's like constantly being pushed harder and harder into something, eventually your body would give under the strain and break and you'd end up dieing. And as for potential for abuse, you're right I don't see it because I planned on using it for the finesse part mostly so I didn't even notice, and to stress the issue since I feel like no one seemed to read the whole thing or I put the wrong version up, yes it does take a lot out of him, and the fact that it could easily kill him from too much use makes it extremely high risk to the point that using it is too dangerous and why hes saves it for a burst to kill people which puts him in minor risk but to get them to that point without using too much energy is extremely difficult. Maybe it would be too much for someone else, or if a character would use it differently, but the fact that he doesn't kinda nullifies that...Just saying cause at that point if it's used a way the character wouldn't use it in then it's either meta gaming or god modding or something which would disqualify myself from this RP anyway. IF I didn't cover any concerns let me know, because I made sure with the GM before I posted it whether or not he was alright with it.

Here's my character addition, I didn't know whether or not I should put it up in the OOC first or here. I have most of the info down, but I ran out of time so I'll write more when I get back from work today.

Basic Information

Name: Terri Cruz
Nickname/Alias/Etc: Godhand; Brass Knuckles
Gender: Male
Age: 18
Height: 5'7
Weight: 150 lbs
Status: New Student

Appearance
He is somewhat tall and has a naturally muscular build from a hard life. He doesn't exactly have any notable features about him, and tends to blend in with the crowd easily. His hair is dark brown and short, and he has dark brown eyes. He sometimes tends to grow some fuzz on his chin, although he tries to shave whenever he can. He sometimes gives off a sort of older brother aura.

Hair Color: Dark Brown
Eye Color: Brown
Ethnicity: Tan (sometimes darker due to working outside a lot)
Physical Appearance: Somewhat broad shoulders with a with a somewhat thick abdomen obtained from a labor-intensive lifestyle.
Attire: He is not used to wearing a lot of different types of clothes. His main outfits consist of a jumpsuit (when working) with a muscle t-shirt underneath.
Personality
He is generally an agreeable person who tries not to insinuate conflict between individuals and always tries to break up problems before they start. While he is generally nice, he tends to look down upon people coming from more well-off families. Sometimes this may be to a point where it clouds his own judgement.
Despite having a sense of honor, Terry is not above fighting dirty due to having grown up on the streets.

Outward & Innate Personality: Towards others, Terry tries to generally be friendly although he isn't usually one to start up a conversation. This is because generally he is wary of others, as he has learned that kindness can also sometimes net you enemies.
Hobbies/Interests: Reading books; managing the budget; cooking; drawing manga (although he is not good at it); Basketball (he is fairly good due to having played often).
Skills/Talents: He is good at cooking. Among the oldest children in his foster home, he often spent time trying to find ways to cook leftovers in the fridge when there was not enough money to go out and buy things. He is also knowledgeable in regards to street fighting, having learned some basic martial arts from an old master who lived on the same block. However his skills are relatively poor compared to those who train regularly, and he manages get by on experience and luck.
Prized Possession: Friendship and health.
Quote(s): *sigh* "I am in the red again this month too huh?"
"Those who don't work, don't eat!"
History/Bio:
Terry grew up in New York. He was left in the hospital by his mother after the doctors determined that an abortion was too dangerous. He never knew his parents, and cycled throughout the foster care system. Thankfully, the first home that he went in belonged to a kind older man who taught him about the goodness in others. There he lived together with 6 other children and they soon grew to become a tight-knit family Unfortunately the man died when Terry was 8, and he and his family were seperated.
Terry was shuffled into another foster home, one that simply used the children to get money from the government. While he had lost contact with the other 4, he managed to land in the same home as one of his previous friends, a girl named Anita. The foster mother was always gone partying, and the father would come home drunk and would physically and sexually assault the children. Anita and Terry were no exception and many nights Terry would lie on the ground in pain while the father had his way with the girl. Despite this, the two managed to survive by relying on each other and the other 20 children that lived neglected in the run-down home.
Terry's powers awoke at the age of 10. He came home from school to find his foster father in a drunken stupor and beating the children in the home. Anita was terribly beaten when she tried to shield a 5-year old boy from the man. Out of rage, Terry's powers activated and broke the father's hand when he tried to punch the barrier. Anita was taken to the hospital where she later died of her injuries. While the parents were never convicted, the home was declared unfit for the care of foster children and was shut down. He then circulated around the foster care system.
At the age of 16, Terry began working odd jobs to support himself. Although he excelled academically, he eventually dropped out of high school. He never got to know his foster family well, as he avoided them ever since Anita died. Instead he began living with an old man in a nearby ghetto who was once a martial artist, learning some basics and fundamentals of boxing, Wing Tsun, Capoiera, and Judo. While he had no money, the man let him stay in exchange for finding a job to support himself and doing chores around the home.
= Will add more to the bio when I get back from work =

Family:
Gregory Watson - Foster Father; deceased
Anita - Deceased; suffered ruptured kidneys and died in the hospital
Jesus - Alive; whereabouts unknown
Robert - Alive; whereabouts unknown
Nell - Deceased; killed in gang shooting
Jackson - Deceased; drug overdose

Relationships

Relationships: (Basically a section where you put your character's thoughts on the other ones they've encountered. You can also talk to other people and decide what your characters relations will be.)

[Character name] | [Impression (Good/Bad/Neutral]] | [Relationship (Friend, Rival, Crush, etc)] | [Character's thoughts [EX: I think Bob is quite the amiable fellow, has a great head on his shoulders, but is kinda daft]] |

Abilities

Power Class: Energy
Power: Terry can create an omnipresent barrier capable of blocking anything with a vector. Theoretically the field can be manipulated and expanded infinitely but becomes exponentially more taxing the larger it grows in size and the longer it is maintained. Due to not having a grasp or large understanding of his power, Terry generally limits it to his hands as he feels it makes more sense to him and does not make him as tired. In addition, he has been shown to use it as a sort of "boxing glove" so that he doesn't break his hands when fighting.

Weaknesses/Limitations/Drawbacks: The larger and more intricate the barrier is, the greater the strain on his body. Additionally, the intensity of the attack blocked also adds additional burden on Terry's body which in turn hampers his concentration and weakens his barriers. Trying to block something akin to a car going at 70 miles per hour would often case Terry to be bed-ridden for days. Likewise with bullets, as Terry can only block a short number of small caliber rounds before becoming completely exhausted. Attempts to push this power past his limits can result in the bursting of fragile blood vessels, causing him to bleed out of his eyes and nose and eventually cause hemorraging in his brain. So one can actually kill him by simply attacking his barriers.

Other: He thinks girls with short hair and a little muscle are attractive, which put him at odds with his home boys, who prefer thick women with a "nice ass".

Kukorokoki,

I'm a coGM along with He Who Walks Behind and Allen. We have a character deposite where we put all of our characters (accepted yet or not) to keep the OOC nice and neat. I wont dock you or anything for that since I made that mistake like, four times before I learned what to do. I havent done much besides breifly review his power and with the weaknesses you've given I'm actually pretty okay with it.

I'll review the character more in depth later today, since I'm a bit busy now. But so far so good in my opinion.

Hey Jazzy just for you I'll make my next character really simple and a beginner so that it's a lot easier :p (Not that I wasn't already planning on that :p) I just like to get the difficult ones out of the way first ^_^

Ciphra, the others bring up some really valid points here. So, until you address their concerns, your sheet is declined. And remember what I said in PMs about your sentiments on weaknesses.

Kokurokoki, your sheet checks out so far. I just want his personality (He's nice, what else?) and appearance expanded a bit. But you did say it's a work in progress. So, for now, throw it in the character deposit.

I know, just for some of what they're saying I feel like it was my fault for not being detailed enough, like the fact that the air he controls has to manifested/harvested from like a 3 yard radius around him unless he's doing a full form attack which is more like 7 yards but takes a lot more out of him, and then also kinda just like I was saying earlier when I pointed out how some of what people concerns on 'Light headed' Could actually mean death for him. I want to see what people say now that I've tried to explain it a little better first before I start making revisions. Also for the pressure one for having to physically be touching the target area which is limited to a 2-3 yard diameter for manipulation. And the majority of his finesse attacks involve short small bursts of wind to manuever him and also to slightly damage an opponent more. I think since I kind of just gave people the broad picture that's why they find it over the top so again just kinda wanna see what people think now that I've explained it better ont he page before and even more here.

Edit: Not page before, meant top of the page -_-

I had trouble adjusting Red's ability too Ciphra, but the Allen and the other GM's were helpful enough to guide me. I think that, as long as you focus on their directions, you will come in a conclusion that you will like and will also be acceptable by the bosses. It worked out for me, so why not for you? :D

Inferno, could you have Red be a little more specific about what he wants to know? It'll make future responses easier.

Having already posted, I will do so on my next post. For now, I am going to have some fun with the Amanda vs Red, if you don't mind xD

InfernoBlaze said
I had trouble adjusting Red's ability too Ciphra, but the Allen and the other GM's were helpful enough to guide me. I think that, as long as you focus on their directions, you will come in a conclusion that you will like and will also be acceptable by the bosses. It worked out for me, so why not for you? :D

Fair enough, but I would like to explain things better so it won't seem worse than it is like it apparently does lol. Though if they still don't like it now that I've tried to explain it better that's fine, though I would ask that the The people that decide on this PM what they'd liked to see change so it's easier for me to know who I actually have to satisfy about this, plus it makes it easier for me to find if other people post (Again I am actually partially blind) So that would be greatly appreciated!

Heh.... This is going to be fun.

As for you, Ciphra, I suggest doing what HWWB said. Give him actual weaknesses and cut the pressure manipulation. And no "in between the lines" crap you said in PMs.

I know I know. I'm too cryptic and hide things without realizing I do I'm sorry!

Though for limiting the Pressure again that one I sorta did when I mentioned it above to only touch, I just didn't realize I hadn't mentioned it, so I'm gonna hope that's good enough cause unless you have a better idea, it fits Stephen's profile for physical fighting, and also it wouldn't be an instantaneous thing either so yeah. Again if the people that this are okay with my clarifications let me know and let me know what you'd still like to see changed and suggestions to help me think on it more, though don't always expect it to be your changes it's just your ideas help me think more to improve it in my own way to keep it my character.

I understood that it only works "on touch", but I think we'd be better off if you just cut it.

(Because what do you mean by "only touch"? He has to be touching the air)

Also, I added a small thing to Theresa's power, her drug can remove contaminants like poison and infection. I think it makes sense with the rest of it's effects.

Ciph, the thing with sucking out people's oxygen is that by the way you put it, the oxygen comes out immediately. That shifts the body's energy production from aerobic to anaerobic in about a second. If you cut of oxygen to the brain like that, then person wpuld be knocked put and comatose in about a second, which gives the other person next to no time to react.

Okay Jazzy that's a good point, it would not be instantaneous, would that make that better because it was never intended to be instantaneous. And As for just dropping pressure it would be an object or person in which he would change the pressure around to crush or what have you, though I could cut that, I would ask that we talk about making it fair so that it might be something that he obtains later on.

Yeah, I want you to cut that since it's near uncounterable.

I'm not going to make another post until a few more people post.

Alright. So cutting the pressure part, at least for now. Mind if I PM you my second character concept while I wait to hear about the rest? I promise it's a lot simpler :p

Sure

I'd argue that it would take a LOT of pressure to actually crush somebody with air, and therefore a LOT of exertion on your character's part. Probably too much exertion. However, dropping the air pressure or raising it might still be viable because, A) it's within the realm of your abilities, and B) could probably disorient another person, even if it's just a little. Which in itself can be useful in a high-pressure situation.

Ciphra said
Okay Jazzy that's a good point, it would not be instantaneous, would that make that better because it was never intended to be instantaneous.

Then it's all good in my book. Keep up th good work, sorry you're having to push through so many lines of red tape.