In
Space Oddity
Episode 02
Interplanetary wars were not always grim and bloody affairs. Sometimes, they were rather quaint and even downright fun. More than a few space-faring civilizations had taken the logical step that, if they had been able to make both unmanned drones and spaceships, then surely they would be able to make unmanned space drones to fight their space wars. And thus, for some of the sapient species in the galaxy, war had transformed into something far less gruesome and tragic, and more akin to a clean, safe spectacle with mostly abstract political consequences.
The Third Vektrunixt War of Socio-Communal Restoration had so far been a fine example of this. It was a war fought between the inhabitants of the dozen moons that orbited this beautiful gas giant in the middle of the planetarily crowded Karrte Noxugru star system, in the center of the Sagittarius arm of the Milky Way. The peoples of the moons had split themselves into four factions, with the inciting one aiming to finally restore the semi-legendary Socio-Commune of Vektrunixt, which had once united the moons under one rather nice banner and some good ideas. This was, as the war's most widely accepted name indicated, their third attempt. The other three factions ran the gamut from pearl-clutching xenophobic tyrants who really didn't like the idea of interlunar miscegenation becoming a thing again to socio-communards who mildly disagreed with a couple policy positions of the first faction.
The Cosmomancers had not initially planned to involve themselves in this war, even though they largely sympathized with the socio-communards in particular and freedom fighting in general. Historically speaking, third times were never the charm and they had not been too keen on picking a side in a war in which, at first, nobody appared to be suffering more than minor inconveniences.
Unfortunately, after the fourth week of fighting, things had taken an unexpected turn for the worse, courtesy of a series of attacks targeted at population centers. Casualties had not been enormous, but they had left many refugees, destabilized three moons, and things had started to escalate. And that had led to the Cosmomancers semi-reluctantly intervening.
Now, three weeks after the arrival of the Cosmomancers, the bulk of the fighting was concentrated in Memim, the fourth moon, on the rather picturesque steppes near its southern pole. Thousands of robots and umanned drones clashed in messy explosions of color, made almost oneiric when mingled with the distortions to reality itself and energy bursts from the dozens of cosmomancers fighting alongside them. Beings of all manner of species, dressed in mostly similar gaudy armors, jumped and floated and ran around the field, smashing and slicing and blasting and disintegrating everything in their path. A few of them now and then fell back to help with getting the refugees to safety, but all in all they were all having fun, even if the numbers were not in their favor and it was beginning to look like the anti-socio-communards would win the day.
"Well, this sucks!" Shouted Takol, the annoyance remarkably obvious in the expression on his red face. His black eyes had an annoyed spark in them too, and his white tentacles did not appear to be in a good mood either. More importantly, however, his powers were definitely not expressing any sort of relaxation, given how all the space surrounding him within a couple dozen feet had become heavily warped.
He was not entirely wrong. It did suck somewhat, and the Ophiuchian obviously shared the former Andromedan's sentiment, as the other cosmomancer made a frigate-sized drone shrink until it disappeared. The Ophiuchian was very good at reducing the space between particles until objects were basically not even real anymore. Specially when she was angry.
"Where is Gabriel?" She shouted back. Luckily, she was not too distracted to turn a nearby pebble into a gigantic boulder, which shielded another cosmomancer from a frankly unwarranted missile strike.
"I did not want to ask him to come!" Said Takol, rushing past the Ophiuchian and jumping several feet in the air to pounce on another large drone. He had always enjoyed fighting the big ones. "He's never fought in a war before! I don't want him to get hurt!"
He was barely audible over the sound of the drone itself as he stood on top of it and tore the space between its particles wide open, cutting the very expensive weapon in half.
"Look, I know he's still just a kid, but he's clearly passionate about helping people and making a difference like we do and we could use a bit of that right now!" Said the Ophiuchian over the noise of the boulder she had grown being hurled at a squad of robots by another, gravity-manipulating cosmomancer. Purple smoke and green sparks filled the air as they were all smashed to bits.
Takol landed back on the ground, rump-first, with an audible thud. He had lost some practice in his landings since giving up the Andromedan's title and armor. It took him a couple seconds to catch his breath, and he would have killed for one of those barely legal energy drinks that they sold on the fifth moon.
"Alright, I know we're both a bit rusty but..."
A mechanical roaring in the sky interrupted him, and he looked upwards with much concern.
"Actually, nevermind."
It was a dreadnought. An unmanned dreadnought. And he had just finished expending his anchor with the previous drone. And the dreadnought was pointing its very, very heavy weaponry in the cosmomancers' general direction. And the weapons were charging up very, very, very fast.
And then there was a new sound, higher above. A very unique sound. It was hard to describe it, except perhaps by making a dozen strained analogies and desperately trying to connect them with hyphens and unusual verbs, so why even bother?
It was the sound of a spatial rift. A small but powerful rift, the sort that one should definitely not make without a beacon. And Takol knew at once that a beacon had not been used.
"Kid can sing the entire soundtrack of Rocky Horror by heart," he whispered to himself, simultaneously astonished and depressed. "But he can't remember to use his beacons."
A young human body in the black and violet armor of the Andromedan came through the rift. Or rather, it fell through it. It fell very fast. It fell very fast towards the dreadnought, and then it passed right through the dreadnought and landed on its feel on the ground, just close enough that Takol could see its youthful features and dorky smile. The dreadnought above found itself suddenly suffering from a sudden, very unexpected hole that ran vertically through its supposedly impregnable fuselage, and a rainbow of sparks and fire came from each end of the hole as it began to fall.
"Hey, everyone!" Shouted Gabriel, waving enthusiastically at the surrounding cosmomancers as the show of light behind him hit its deafening crescendo, then died down. Some ghastly human music was coming from one of the armor's hidden pockets, mostly drowned out by the ambience.
"I came as soon as I heard. Ready to help.""Well... At least his heart is in the right place," said Takol, surrendering to the temptation to smile as the massive unmanned spaceship crashed behind his protégé in an absurd show of light, smoke and smouldering material. He stood up, walked to his protégé and, pressed to choose between smacking him on the back of the head and hugging him, opted to hug the adorable human.
"We
could use a hand," said the Ophiuchian. "Mind doing a bit more of...
that while we finish evacuating the people? Or you could do the evacuation yourself while we...?"
Gabriel did not hesitate.
"I'm gonna help evacuate.""Your choice," said the Ophiuchian, before she walked away and towards a new wave of attackers that was approaching their position. It was a very big wave. Supported by another dreadnought. A very angry-looking dreadnought, assuming dreadnoughts could look angry. "But before you do that..."
"The big one?" Asked Gabriel, eyebrow raised and finger pointed at the colossal weapon of mass destruction in the sky.
"The big one," said the Ophiuchian with a nod, her mandibles clicking in what might have been an attempt at making an expression akin to pursed lips. The Ophiuchian's species did not have lips.
"...okay."The human cosmomancer reached into the hidden pocket the music was coming from and pulled out a rather cheap smartphone with a cracked screen. Without taking his eyes off the incoming threat for too long, he put the album that had been playing from it on repeat, stuffed it back in the pocket, and stepped forward.
Humming happily along with Queen and David Bowie, he raised his hand as he began to trot towards the enemy, the Ophiuchian following. From a chain wrapped around his hand hanged his anchor, a young and powerful one, smeared with barbecue sauce. He had accidentally dropped it while having lunch back on Earth and had forgotten to clean it up.
The trot became a sprint and space began to shift around him. The drones and robots opened fire, but their bullets, lasers and missiles were diverted by the spatial distortions. He did not feel like running for a whole mile, though, so Gabriel decided to take a shortcut, and contracted the space between their attackers and them. Once they were upon the attackers, he let go of everything else and focused on the dreadnought. A rift, he just needed a small rift. And a small rift he got, and right where his hand was pointing at in front of him. He and the Ophiuchian jumped through the rift and, after a brief instant in the space between spaces, they were inside the dreadnought.
Alarms blared around them, which made no sense since there were no organic beings to hear it, but Gabriel was not going to file a complaint when he was supposed to be helping his friends and the people of Memim. They quickly made their way through the dreadnought's tight, definitely not organic-friendly corridors, the Ophiuchian and him making short work of the guard drones that came to oppose them. By the time they reached the dreadnought's core, they were coated in the drones' colorful fuel, which made Gabriel feel like he was back in the fun raves of his freshman days, even if the music was not entirely fitting.
The Ophiuchian hacked the core instead of just destroying it, which surprised Gabriel but definitely made him feel like their stunt was a bit less heartless towards this huge machine than he had initially feared. They made the dreadnought crash-land right on top of two of the columns of robots, which
was a bit brutal, even if the robots did not have any actual intelligence, and came out from the dreadnought powers ablazing.
"Thanks, kid!" Shouted the Ophiuchian as she took on the robots by the dozens. "Now go help the people!"
Gabriel quickly opened himself a new rift while dodging a few shots from their foes.
"Thanks for letting me choose!" He shouted back as he formed a spatial shield just in time to deflect a very heavy laser.
"I don't think I was born to be a soldier!""Well, we gotta do what our heart tells us to do!" Said the Ophiuchian just as she stole one of the robots' energy rifles and turned it on its owner. "And you've got a good heart! It'd be a waste having you just smash things or make them explode like I do!"
"Thanks! And good luck!" Said Gabriel, and jumped into the rift. A handful of robots tried to follow him, and their controllers immediately regretted it as the rift closed around them.
On the other side he found the people who needed his help. Hundreds of them, trapped right in the middle of the battlefield, huddled together among the ruins of what used to be their homes. They were visibly scared when they saw him, and he tried to reassure them with a warm smile as he created a spatial shield around them and lent one of them a hand to stand up.
"Hi," he said with his customary warmth, hand raised in greeting, a very nice gesture which was slightly undercut by a loud blast which sounded a bit too close for comfort. Many of the people around him yelped in fear, but he was unwavering.
"Is anyone hurt?"Fortunately, he got many shaking heads in response. He sighed with relief.
"Okay. It shouldn't be long now, but I imagine none of you feels like waiting a minute more."A massive bang. Something big and filled with volatile fuel had definitely blown up close by.
"So... I'm here to escort you all to safety, if that's fine with you."There was a palpable bewilderment in their reactions, yet in an instant they were all in agreement. There were too many of them to open up a rift into a safer place, so they were going to have to walk together while Gabriel tried to protect them. He was fine with that.
"If anyone needs to be carried, I'll be happy to lend you a hand, alright? Don't be afraid to ask. We're all getting through this if we work together," he told the column of refugees that followed him, facing them as he walked backwards, keeping an eye at all times on the enemy fire directed at them. His spatial shield was holding up despite its size and the intensity of the attacks. So far, so good.
The march was not too long, and Gabriel was energetic and eager enough that he managed to keep them all safe and sound against the onslaught. Whenever a drone got too close, he was able to focus just enough, without losing sight of the shield, to apply a bit of spatial manipulation and split it in half by expanding the space between its right down the middle particles. An elderly woman did end up needing to be carried, and once again he managed, the piggybacking barely affecting him as he lured one large drone into a rift that probably led to the moon's north pole. And all the while, Queen and David Bowie kept playing from the hidden pocket in his armor.
The battle was won without a single person losing their lives. As they arrived at the Cosmomancers' safehaven, he could hear the last of the large enemy drones fall in the distance, and one of the other cosmomancers immediately confirmed it: they had, in fact, won. And not just the battle. The war too. The anti-socio-communards, having finally ran out of drones and robots, had sued for peace as soon as that drone had crashed into the steppe.
The third time had finally been the charm, and it had all been thanks to them.
The hours after the Hounds' attack on Berkeley were almost exactly like the moments that had followed that battle on Memim, close to the end of Gabriel's first year as the Andromedan. Almost but not quite because, in Memim, he had had his fellow cosmomancers with him, giving him guidance.
The students who had not been taken to the hospital just sat around campus, openly happy that the battle had been won but clearly struggling to move past the terrible fact that a battle had occurred in the first place. Gabriel had not bothered to take his costume off as he sat with the group he felt most comfortable with, in a corner of a cozy coffee shop just outside of the campus. Jake was beside him, cradling a cup of hot cocoa, cute eyes lost in the distance. Gabriel kept his arm around him, now and then giving his temples a little kiss. He was having an orange and strawberry smoothie, because he felt he needed and deserved it, and a chocolate muffin, because his stomach was weird and, instead of feeling sick when he was stressed or nervous, he felt ravenous.
In front of them, another student was holding up a tablet, showing him footage of the Hounds' attacks on other American cities. He was more distraught than angry, more concerned with the suffering of the victims than with the villainy of the culprits. Compared to those tragedies, Berkeley almost seemed like a minor skirmish, not worth his concern.
But Berkeley was his home. Or at least his home away from home. The people here mattered to him personally. They were an active part of his life. And the Hounds had targeted them. Had they taken advantage of his long abscense? Did they even know he existed?
He bit on his muffin with perhaps a bit too much purpose, and needed a long sip of his smoothie to wash it down.
"That's enough, Kat," said Jake to the student with the tablet.
"It's fine," said Gabriel.
"I needed to see that.""You're just torturing yourself," said Jake. "It's already happened, so watching it over and over isn't going to change anything. And other heroes have already taken care of things. They're saying on Twitter that Icon and others are on their way to disable the Hounds' satellite."
This time, it was Jake who gave him a kiss.
"And you were here when we needed you most."
That made Gabriel smile, if with a bit of effort.
"So... what are you going to do next?"
"Help," said Gabriel simply.
Jake chuckled. "Well, that's not vague at all."
"I'm basically making it up as I go along, being a late-comer and all," Gabriel said sheepishly.
"Where are these Hounds concentrating their attacks?""Lost Haven, of course."
"I feel terrible for the people of that city," said Kat. "They never seem to catch a break. I know some people blame it on the disproportionately large population of meta-humans there, but at this point it's just plain bad luck."
"I've... never been to Lost Haven," said Gabriel.
"I have," said Jake. "It's not a terrible city. The people are nice, at least. A bit crowded, though, specially if you want to get inside their world of meta-humans."
"I'm already part of a very big team," said Gabriel, a bit of laughter in his voice.
"Two if we count the swimming team.""You're still coming to the next Queer Student Union meeting though, right?" Asked Jake, half-joking from the sound of it and the disarmingly cute expression on his face.
Gabriel laughed despite himself.
"With or without the armor?"
The Hounds had never had much of a foothold in California. Their attempted pogrom in Berkeley had been one of a small handful of simultaneous attacks across the state, and all of them had been failures. The meta-human killers did not lack for ruthlessness or resources, but they had evidently underestimated the solidarity of Californians towards their meta-human peers, as well as the willingness of Californians to use firearms in defense of their neighbors. And so the Hounds had found themselves outnumbered and quickly overwhelmed in every city they attacked.
The point was that not many groups of Hounds had been left rampaging through the state, or at least none that Gabriel could find as he gave much of the state a quick, rift-aided glance. If they had any sort of organization still in place in the region, it was deeply underground and not too eager to try genociding meta-humans again.
So the Andromedan mostly dedicated his time to smaller problems for a bit, problems which involved neither the Hounds or anything from outside of the Earth's atmosphere. He helped firefighters save some people and their adorable pets from a burning building in San Francisco, then thwarted a ridiculously elaborate assassination plot on the mayor of Los Angeles, and then he assisted in finding and recovering several animals stolen from the San Diego Zoo. It took his mind off things, grounded him, and left him with plenty of time to go back to Berkeley and hang out with his friends as they all tried to deal with all that had happened.
In short, after realizing that trouble was no longer coming to him, or at least to his general vicinity, Gabriel refrained from looking for trouble elsewhere. As Jake had said, meta-humans were doing some good work against the Hounds. And besides, there was what Takol had said. He had to stay on Earth if possible and, as the principled young man that he was, he was committed to abiding by Takol's advice.
Then, just as he thought his hectic day was coming to a calm, mellow end, he got a tip. No, the Andromedan was not exactly the detective sort, but sometimes he got tips and he felt the obligation to pursue them, even if he was not much of a deductive person. Although the Earth was still a fairly marginal player in the galaxy's vast political, economic and cultural landscape, the aftermath of the Pax Metahumana incident had caught enough attention outside of the star system to attract a small number of traders and smugglers. What they had created, while technically legal, given that there were no human laws on interplanetary trade, was definitely an ethical black market. Dangerous alien artifacts and 'exotic pets' were sold in the barely hidden marketplaces scattered around the world. Thanks to Takol, Gabriel had come to know the location of every single one of them, and had the phone numbers (yes, they used phones) of a few alien merchants who knew better than to be on the wrong side of the Cosmomancers.
The tip consisted of two words: Thorian Threshers. On its own, it did not mean much to Gabriel, other than the still fresh and still scary memory of being chased by one on the desert planet of Tlievot. So he texted a lot of question marks until his source finally gave him a third word.
Milwaukee.
And that sent a shiver down Gabriel's spine. Not because of the obvious ominous implication in combining all three words and knowing that the source was an alien merchant, but because Milwaukee meant Wisconsin.
One thing that even Wisconsinites ignored was that their largest city was home to the largest alien marketplace on planet Earth. Which was remarkable, given how little effort the merchants put into keeping it secret. All you had to do to find it was ask the
totally human employees at a little travel agency in the busiest part of the Bayshore Town Center if they knew how to get a business visa for Nepal. Confident that it was extremely unlikely anyone would ever ask that sort of thing seriously, and not worrying much about the repercussions of their laziness backfiring, they would then direct you to a room in the back. There you would find a comically deep hole in the middle of the floor, which would lead you down to a big, well-lit and well-kept tunnel. At the end of this tunnel was a big fancy door with a little friendly sign that welcomed you while reminding you that the alien merchants did not accept any human credit cards except, for some obscure reason, Argencard.
The marketplace itself was... actually quite wonderful. Despite the dubiously ethical practices, it had a warmth and an energy to it that felt very reminiscent of that of the greater bazaars in Andromeda. There was a rustic, old-fashioned quality to it that mingled remarkably well with the advanced technology and alien peoples that packed the narrow corridors and balconies. And the food being sold in the carts smelled weird but tempting, just how he remembered it.
"It tastes like ice cream," said Jake as he stabbed his spoon back in his bowl, his lips and tongue tinged blue by the concoction. He had insisted on coming with him the moment Gabriel had slipped up and mentioned that it was an alien marketplace. And Gabriel, having a soft spot for people in general, but specially cute people like Jake, had given up on his attempt to deter him.
"It kinda is ice cream," he said, taking a big spoonful from his own bowl and consuming it with relish. He had tried to look serious at first, since he was supposed to be following a lead, but it was hard not to look happy in his current circumstances.
"It's just that the ingredients are not from Earth.""And it's lactose free, you said?"
"Yeah," said Gabriel before he stuck his tongue out to see if it had been tinged blue too. It had.
"Turns out most sapient species don't get the appeal of drinking another species' milk, specially as adults, so they just make do without any dairy products.""So you're saying humans are the culinary weirdos in the galaxy?"
"Umm... yeah, pretty much."The merchant he was looking for was in one of the most popular corners of the marketplace: the pet stores. Or at least the interplanetary black market equivalent of pet stores, which included a lot of heavy weaponry and
really fancy accessories.
"Kurrenj Toh, hi!" he said to the rather placid-looking old alien who sat in the middle of a very cozy wood-and-steel cabin, surrounding by his very cuddly alien animals. Kurrenj Toh Feafejtla was a Graurra, a semi-lepidopteran species that resembled the Earth's moths, but without any wings and just four limbs.
"How is your family?"The Graurra's colorful, fuzzy face was quite expressive as she looked at him with what was most likely surprise and a bit of concern. She petted one of her animals with increased intensity, earning a very loud purring in response.
"Andromedan, it's been so long..." She said with a mechanical voice. Graurra could not speak English, or most human languages for that matter, without some technological help. "What has brought you back to me?"
"Thorian Thrashers," said Gabriel as he gave an approaching six-legged reptile a gentle pat on the head. It licked his gloved hand with an orange tongue.
"Have you or any other sellers here been trying to smuggle them into the planet?"She said nothing at first, but her antennae twitched.
"Who told you that?"
"Mlebla, the ice cream seller," said Gabriel.
"He keeps an eye on everything while he's here... and he sends me cute cat videos in his free time. Anyway... did you?"Kurrenj Toh still said nothing, but her antennae twiched harder, and she looked sideways.
"Kurrenj Toh, no," he said, and sounded genuinely, heartbreakingly disappointed.
"Why would you do that? I know that they're not evil monsters or anything, but there's a reason why we banned Thrashers in the Cosmomancers' sanctuary. You can't do anything with them other than pray they don't eat someone.""What's a Thorian Thrasher?" Asked Jake, and glanced at the alien. "By the way he talked about them, they sounded like space dragons or something."
"Thorian Thrashers are a very special gift from the Cosmos, human," said Kurrenj Toh, pointing at a poster on a wall to her left, which depicted one very big and mean Thorian Thrasher devouring a Tlievot sand worm. "With a beautiful... soul, like all other blessed creatures of this Universe. Really."
"It looks like a dragon sculpture made out of runny cream cheese," said Jake, looking understandably repulsed and a bit intimidated. "Do they really eat people?"
"Only sometimes," said Kurrenj Toh nonchalantly. Or maybe that was just the language device doing a bad job of putting emotion into her voice. She turned to Gabriel. "I had a committed buyer, Andromedan, and they offered good pay for a newborn one."
"But you're friends with Takol," said Gabriel.
"How do you think he'll feel when I tell him that you've been doing the one thing he trusted you all to never ever do? Earth already goes through enough trouble without throwing Thorian Thrashers into the mix.""I just needed a good last trade so I didn't have to leave empty-handed," said Kurrenj Toh.
That gave Gabriel pause.
"Leave?" He asked, taking a step forward. One of the animals growled at him, but Kurrenj Toh shut it up with a bit of extra petting.
"You're leaving the marketplace?""I'm leaving Earth, Andromedan," she said slowly, perhaps trying to make her words sound meaningful. "And I'm returning to my homeworld and my family. My time among your kind, wonderful though you are, is coming to its end."
"But what...?"A rift opened behind them, covering the corridor outside and the store's interior in its multicolored, shimmering glow. The animals shuddered and huddled closer to the Graurra.
Then
she appeared, in her heavy, bright red cosmomancer's armor.
The Delphinian, and the only other human cosmomancer.
"Claudia?""Oh..." Said Claudia Southern, looking at Gabriel with absolute apathy. "It's you."
"Hey, yeah, hi," he said with an uneasy smile.
"And this amazing person beside me is Jake. Are you here about the Thorian Thrashers too?""Hi, Jake," she said with just a little bit of warmth, not moving one inch from where she was standing. "And what Thorian fucking Thrashers? I just heard that alien merchants were leaving the planet en masse and thought I might as well ask the moth lady about it."
"She has a name, Claudia," said Gabriel, and directed his eyes at Kurrenj Toh again.
"Also... what does she mean 'en masse'? It's not just you?""We may be mere salespeople, humans," said Kurrenj Toh, "but we can perceive the subtle changes in the cosmic climate. We can tell when a new force begins to influence the way things are. There's an invisible hand at work and we, sensible investors that we are, are going to take our gains and go home while you nice cosmomancers deal with it."
The humans stared in silence. Her antennae twitched again.
"Also, there might be a galaxy-wide recession coming soon and I can't risk making more investments in a marginal planet like this one," she spoke again, faster, almost like she was embarrassed. "Turns out there
was a space station construction bubble in Perseus and it's about to burst."
"What did you mean by an 'invisible hand'?" Asked Claudia with her customary sneer, voice laiced with a dangerous lack of patience.
"A few weeks ago, in the galactic Outer Arm, some of our competitors came into contact with a mysterious trio of ships. Their designs were unlike anything they had ever seen, they carried no known insignias, and their crews insisted on communicating exclusively through audio. There was no way to identify them."
The Graurra stood up and walked to a dark corner of her store, her animals whining behind her in various tones at the loss of her fuzzy warmth. In that corner, there was a lot of advanced technology, mostly computers that tracked the economic trends for her particular sort of products, but also a very sophisticated-looking safe. From inside it she produced something... odd.
"You ever heard of the concept of predatory pricing, humans? Nasty strategy. I used it all the time in my youth."
In her fuzzy hand, she held an oval-shaped object that seemed to be somewhere between metallic, ceramic and crystalline in nature. More noteworthy, however, was that it appeared to pulse with colorful lights from within.
"But you know what's even worse than predatory pricing? Just plain buying many of our Outer Arm competitors out, probably to set up a monopoly. And then give them new products, weapons. And then, in exchange for all that, only make two requests of them..."
She set the object down on a nearby table, cluttered with various accessories and tools of the Graurra's trade.
"First, that they used their new resources to start a trade war in the busiest markets in the galaxy," she explained. "I trust that you are all smart enough to know what a galactic trade war would entail."
Gabriel held his breath without realizing it. He did know. Claudia did too, from her grimace. Jake... still seemed absolutely fascinated by this new universe he was discovering, so Gabriel had to assume he could not quite understand the meaning of Kurrenj Toh's words yet.
"And second," continued the Graurra, "that they distributed gifts to every cosmomancer in the Milky Way."
"So that's one of the gifts?" Asked Gabriel.
"Surreptitiously bought from a really stupid competitor of ours, yes."
"And what is it?" Asked Jake.
"Could be a bomb," said Claudia.
Gabriel gave her a concerned look.
"Why does your mind always go straight to terrorism?""Because I live in the real world, fuckhead?"
"Now you're just being antagonistic for the sake of it and I won't engage you," he said before he turned his back on her altogether.
"What else can you tell us, Kurrenj Toh?The Graurran hesistated. When she finally spoke, it was in a lowered voice.
"I imagine that your peers know more about such mysteries of the stars than we do," she said, taking the object in her hand again and giving it to a still puzzled Gabriel.
"We should try to open it," said Claudia, suddenly standing beside him. "But not here. Do you have a beacon?"
Gabriel nodded, not taking his eyes off the 'gift', trying and failing to maybe get some information just by staring at it like an idiot. He eventually gave up.
"Jake," he said at last looking at his... boyfriend? Maybe in the next couple weeks he would know for sure.
"Could you wait for me with Kurrenj Toh?"Jake expressed his agreement with a very short, very sweet kiss, and a playful pat on his shoulder. Which must have looked absolutely adorable, because Jake was a lot shorter than him.
"Kurrenj Toh, I'm sure you and Jake will get along great," he told the Graurran as he made a gesture with his fingers in the direction of an empty space in the room. A rift appeared.
"Jake studies anthropology at UC Berkeley."And with that said, the two cosmomancers jumped into the rift together. The mesmerizing anomaly in space collapsed on itself a few seconds later, leaving the young human, the Graurran and a lot of animals alone in relative silence.
"So..." Began Kurrenj Toh. "Just human anthropology?"
Jake nodded, absentmindedly caressing some animal's fur without looking.
"I have a daughter," said the Graurran. "She's specializing in Perseus Arm anthropology. Lots of very diverse civilizations to study."
"You must be proud," said Jake, smiling.
"I am," she said. "And besides, she's better off studying sapients than non-sapients like her mother."
"Is it as expensive as it is here?"
"Expensive?"
"Her education?"
Kurrenj Toh watched him in what appeared to be a stunned muteness, at least for a few moments.
"I don't understand your question, human," Kurrenj Toh finally spoke. "What sort of monstrous civilization would force their children to pay for studying anthropology?"
Jake said nothing for a while. He stuck to quietly petting the animals with the fuzzy, moth-like alien, and tried not to sob.
An uninhabited ice planet. It was perfect for opening a mysterious and probably dangerous object, and it had the added benefit of not reminding Gabriel of Thorian Thrashers. And besides, he really liked watching the auroras.
The two cosmomancers stood there for a bit, contemplating the sky and paying little attention to the thing in Gabriel's hand. Their breath turned into steam in front of them.
"So... Claudia...""Hmm?"
"I wanted to apologize for stranding you for three days on an asteroid in the outer rim of Andromeda.""You think I'm still salty over that? It's been a couple months now."
"Yes, I think you're still angry.""Well, I am."
"I didn't know you didn't have a beacon with you," said Gabriel.
"Otherwise I would have left you in Mongolia or Australia."One of the corners of Claudia's mouth rose to form a half-smirk on her face, but there was not much humor in her eyes.
"I suppose I kind of deserved it when you pushed me into that rift. I
had almost killed innocent people."
"I don't think you're a bad person, Claudia..." Said Gabriel.
"But you think, say and do terrible things a bit too often.""Maybe you should consider the possibility that we're looking at things through different lenses?" She said, grabbing the 'gift' from Gabriel's hand. "You spend your time either doing the smallest things or protecting the galaxies alongside the others in far away worlds. I'm the only one of the two who actually picks the big battles taking place right on Earth."
"The moment you pick a side in those battles, though, you're making a political decision.""Of course I'm making a political decision," she said. "But so are you, you dumbfuck. The only difference is that your political decisions when it comes to Earth boil down to doing the bare minimum because you're scared of your own convictions."
"Claudia, I'm a bisexual Christian socialist who joined a libertarian commune of space wizards. If I start making major decisions on Earth, I'm definitely going to alienate a lot of people."He sighed.
"You don't have that problem, because you're always on the 'right' side. You're on the side of the people who just want things to be 'normal' and comfortable. But what if what's 'normal' is actually awful in its own right?"She said nothing.
He said nothing.
They let a couple minutes pass, gazed at the auroras some more, then simultaneously decided that it was time to do what they had come here to do.
"That thing is not from the Milky Way or Andromeda," said Gabriel.
"Or at least not from any part I'm familiar with."Claudia nodded in agreement.
"Maybe we should do this from a distance?""Oh, absolutely."
She placed the 'gift' on the snow, and the two of them walked in opposite directions, until they were far enough that the 'gift' was barely visible. And then Gabriel did the honors, expanding the space between the particles until he saw the 'gift' split in half.
Claudia was the first to reach the remains, and let out a relieved sigh as she kneeled on the snow.
"It wasn't a bomb, at least."
"But what was it?"When Claudia stood up, she did so with something held tightly in her hand. Something that was producing a lot of pulsing light. For the first time in a long while, Gabriel saw some excitement show on her face, only for it to disappear all too quickly.
"It's... a beacon," she whispered to herself, then raised her face to Gabriel's. "I can feel it."
Gabriel touched the object, its surface somehow both crystalline and metallic at once, and he knew.
"And we know where it leads.""Triangulum."
"There are no cosmomancers in Triangulum," he said, progressively feeling more concerned than captivated.
"So who would know to send us a beacon?""It's so strange, though," said Claudia. "It doesn't feel as... natural as other beacons. The texture is all wrong, the energy is too condensed, like it's somehow been depurated... or synthesized."
"We should take it to the sanctuary.""If what the moth lady..."
"She has a name.""If what
she said is right... then other cosmomancers may have gotten their own 'gifts' there already."
She gave him a meaningful look, and he frowned at her as he understood her meaning.
"We're not using it.""
You are not using it, shithead," she declared, taking a step back. "I'm going alone. I'll tell you later what I've found."
She raised her hand with the beacon in the cold air. A rift opened behind her, and she went through it without saying another word. Gabriel did not get the chance to try to dissuade her or say goodbye.
"Please tell me you didn't already sell the Thrasher," said Gabriel as soon as he came through a new rift into Kurrenj Toh's store.
"Fortunately for you, Andromedan, I did not," answered Kurrenj Toh. "I think my buyer died. Something about satellites striking American cities?"
"Sorry to hear it," said Gabriel, a bit confused about his own words for a bit, but finally determining that, yes, the buyer dying in the Hounds' attacks was sad, despite their unethical purchasing habits.
"Does this mean that you will send the Thrasher back to its home planet?""I'm not doing that. I lost people trying to get it here.
You send it back, human."
"I am not coming within a mile of any Thorian Thrashers, Kurrenj Toh. Even babies.""You are within fifteen feet of a baby Thrasher right now."
Gabriel immediately took a look around, bourdeaux eyes searching the place for something pale, ugly and dragon-like. And then he noticed it.
"You kept it in your herbs garden in the back?""It likes my herbs."
"That's... actually very sweet," he said without an iota of irony.
"So what planet did you get it from? Where to should I open a rift?""Takol told me he rescued you from an adult Thrasher back on..."
"Tlievot," Gabriel groaned, half frustrated and half incredulous, falling onto a couch beside a very cheerful Jake.
"Because of course you got it from Tlievot. Because the Cosmos loves coincidences.""That it does, Andromedan," said Kurrenj Toh, and for the first time he heard her laugh through her language device. It was not a bad laugh.