[Withdrawn] Marcus Veel - Sith Beastmaster

How long do you usually write?
One to two paragraphs, but it varies, I like time to set a tone but also I think there's a skill in writing succinctly 

 Do you enjoy writing collaborative posts for things like conversations, combat, etc.? 
Yes! Though sometimes I struggle with a rp where characters are closely intermingled for the entire duration of the rp.

 Is grammar and depth of writing important to you? 
Yes, though I'm human and sometimes slip on the grammar from time to time.

 Are there any writing subjects you particularly enjoy exploring? 
I enjoy writing characters that have a genuine inner conflict.

 Is there anything you really dislike and want to avoid like the plague? 
Slice of life is a bit dull to me, aside from that I don't like mary-sues or drama outside the rp...but who does?

 Is there something you are uncomfortable with happening to your character? 
Not really, I don't see my characters as 'author avatars' in any way. 

 Do you have any short-term or long-term goals with this character? 
Yes. [Cackles in Sith]


 Name: 
Marcus Veel
 Species: 
Umbaran (Near Human)
 Homeworld: 
Umbara
 Age: 
41
 Gender: 
Male
 Rank: 
Sith Apprentice
 Master: 
None (If that's allowed?) 
 Former master(s): 
None
 Apprentice(s): 
N/A
 Sphere of influence: 
None


Short description of candidate.


Of middling height, though appears smaller owing to his hunched posture. A sinewy build however generally appears larger when wearing furs (usually a wookie pelt) and basic armour. Typical of his inferior specie he has light skin with a slight bluish tint and eyes without colour, he speaks quickly but often with a stammer. Marcus' most notable feature are the three large scars running across his face, presumably left from an encounter with a savage animal.

Simplified report on known Force techniques and estimated levels.

Like one may expect of a Beastmaster Marcus has a strong innate talent toward Animal Friendship techniques, and is also quite proficient in Plant Surge and being capable but somewhat clumsy with mind-tricks. Aside from his use of Detoxifying Poison his only other real talent lies with Force Stealth which he was training in specially before being used as a Jedi spy.

Simplified report on other known skills and estimated levels, including lightsaber training.

As a former member of the Jedi Agricultural Corps Marcus Veel has had training the standard lightsaber form and is knowledgeable regarding Jedi philosophy. Having failed to construct a lightsaber as a Jedi he has similarly not been issued one by the Empire. Instead he makes use of an Electro-Whip, which being non-lethal is more useful in his work as a beast-master and in its unconventionality may provide him with some advantage in combat to mitigate his lack of skill. It's noted that in combat he makes use of the Sokan 'form' while preferring form zero when he can.

Marcus has extensive knowledge of exotic animals and their locations, by extension making him an expert on poisons and toxins as well as tracking and hunting. He is also knowledgable on livestock, plants and agricultural techniques as a whole. 

Quick report on political influence, ownerships, associates and rivals.

As an independent beast-master one could be forgiven for thinking that he had nothing really in the way of connections across the galaxy. However while he has no real political pull, he is well aquainted with a number of big-game hunters and animal smugglers across the galaxy and even a few Hutt-lords with a penchant for keeping exotic beasts know his name.  

He pilots a convict transport ship converted into what amounts to a small flying zoo designed to transport a variety of beasts.

Notable is the fact he is a Jedi defector, meaning he has a knowledge of republic and Jedi workings. After working as a spy for a number of years he finally left the Jedi with them believing him KIA. The Republic being ignorant of both his survival and defection could some day be useful. 

Psychological evaluation of candidate.

Marcus, like most beastmasters is thought of highly within the ranks of the Sith, often seen as little more than glorified stablehands. Especially so for someone who not only is a filthy NEAR-human but also a former failed Jedi. He has expressed repeated exasperation at his low rank within the Sith, it seems clear to us that he has fulfilled his main usefulness to the Empire though.

It has been suggested that Apprentice Veel should not be dismissed out of hand so easily. As unlikely as it sounds, there is always the remote possibility that he is overlooked and viewed as weak simply because he wishes to be overlooked and viewed as weak...  

List of uncovered and suspected flaws. To be put into restricted database.

Ignorant of Sith culture/history owing to his Republic upbringing
Does not currently possess a lightsaber
Considered a 'low-level' force sensitive 
Low ranking in the Sith heirachy

Major achievements and failures on record.

Marcus Veel is credited as one of our foremost spies in the lead up to the treaty of Corusant, his help along with many others helped bring us to such a resounding victory over the Jedi and the Republic.

Personal biography, as detailed by the candidate for use in imperial archives. Acquired shortly after last achievement of note.


Note: This was a draft message we discovered by administrators composed by Marcus but deleted before it could be completed or sent.

I gave up everything for you, spied for years against the Republic, betrayed and killed my friends and family and for what I ask you? So I could ferry animals across the galaxy and shovel dung for the rest of my life!? I joined the Sith because you people said you would set me free! You haven't even seen fit to issue me a lightsaber. 

I know that I was never a real Jedi, yes the corps are for the rejects who couldn't graduate to padawans. But that's because the Jedi never gave me a chance, you said things would be different here but it's just more of the same. No one respects me and I've gone from being a failed Jedi to a failed Sith. I..I could do so much more.

I swear that if things don't change, if I don't get the recognition that I rightfully deserve in this Empire then I'll-

Note: Instead the following message was sent.

Once again I just want to thank you and the all of the Empire for allowing me to join and to express how much more satisfied I am here than with the accursed Jedi. I have attached a detailed report on my next locations for acquisitions, if it pleases you my lord.

- Marcus

@Whirligig

Rank: 
Sith Apprentice (Beastmaster)
Master: 
None (If that's allowed?)
everyone has some kind of master in the Sith Empire, except the Emperor. If they don’t want to be involved with their master they can just list some generic lord or Darth who never pays them any attention and lets them do whatever but doesn't give them anything either.

Given his sort of rank, position and situation, his not having a master at all is highly unlikely, unless you want him to be stuck in the Sith Academy as an acolyte, (seemingly) forever at the command of the Overseers.


We would be appreciative if you could format the Force techniques known as a list with skill levels (see guide to the force), and have a short description after the list of how you imagine he primarily uses the force. Mostly to give GMs and other players a feel for what he’s like in using the Force.
Given his age, he will know a decent bit.

If you look in the Sith Guide, you’ll see that Sith don’t have issues with giving apprentices their first lightsaber. While constructing one is a valuable test of skill, it is not one that all Sith feel is “necessary” the way the Jedi do. An electro-whip is an interesting choice of weapon, but it is not of much use vs. a lightsaber.
If he were to come into combat with another Sith or have to face Jedi, he would be easily killed due to the lack of a lightsaber. There’s a lot of beasts that at best will be irritated by an electro-whip. Having a real weapon to deal with that is advised if you wish for him to live. (which we presume you do)

You should note his piloting skill level in under his non-force skills.


There is one thing you have to define and make clear… When exactly did he join the empire? Was it voluntary (seeking them out), or was he found and given a choice where it was join or die?


As for his flaws…
Ignorant of Sith culture/history owing to his Republic upbringing
Does not currently possess a lightsaber
Considered a 'low-level' force sensitive
Low ranking in the Sith hierarchy
Any Force Sensitive found outside the traditional borders of the Empire, whether they be volunteers, conscripts, captured Jedi or anything like that, will be put through a basic training regimen in the Sith Academy. That will impart a basic understanding of Sith culture and history, as it is intended to form them into proper Sith. It might not give a deep understanding the way being born into the Empire would, but some understanding will come.

The point about lightsaber is covered above.

The last two flaws are basically the same thing. And they don’t amount to much beyond limited political influence. Having a master, even one that is the apprentice of a sith lord’s apprentice (or further down the chain) will provide some very basic influence and protection. Granted, the further down the chain of command and importance to powerful Sith, the less this protection and influence amounts to.

We would like to see some flaws that are rooted more in his personality and character, rather than just his situation. Is he prone to angry outbursts? Is he fanatically loyal to anyone? Is he terrified of nerfs? How does he feel about the Jedi?


You speak of him as a major spy, yet nothing about such skills is mentioned anywhere else in the sheet, nor do his skills relate to this in any significant manner. This disparity doesn’t add up.

The text you wrote in the interview section as interesting. Perhaps compose a couple of more in that sort of flavor for other elements that make up his character? You could perhaps use [quote][/quote] tags to separate the various sections, or use tags for horizontal lines.

[Withdrawn] Marcus Veel - Sith Beastmaster

Whirligig

Ellri Lord of Eat / Relic