Due to the incredible tenacity and pure metal of the real title, we instead present to you...
If you’re here it is because you’ve had it with the flood of grimdarkness, the scourge of deep thinking and the frilly so-called-edge of the newest spawn of fantasy. Instead you want the beef and pure brawn of the classic fantasies often screamed about in the ballads of power metal; you wan’t the barbarians, you want the brutality, you want the corded muscle straining in your faceness of the epics of the late 20th century -- and you want them in a loin cloth and holding an axe. Korgoth, He-Man, Golden Axe, Conan, and so many others had that hard ripping funk -- the real beef, and we are bringing it back with this simple roleplay.
You’re a champion of the Mountain King, a stone cold elder of throbbing mass and wise hard hitting words. Your loyalty to the King is what netted you this most sacred of missions -- to retrieve the vial of the Rainbow Warrior from his eternal crypt so that you may save the Mountain King himself as he lays on his stone cold bed of throbbing headaches, dying of a mysterious illness.
This macguffin won’t be so easy -- if it were, why send a beefy champion such as yourself? NO! You will have to cross the crawling deserts, cut through scrawny wizards, climb the tallest peaks, find your way through the kingdom in the clouds, find the land of light, and best the grave protections of the Rainbow Warrior’s crypt -- and then do it all again on your way back. Are you up to the challenge?
The Beefiest Roleplay that the Guild has Ever...
SEEN
If you’re here it is because you’ve had it with the flood of grimdarkness, the scourge of deep thinking and the frilly so-called-edge of the newest spawn of fantasy. Instead you want the beef and pure brawn of the classic fantasies often screamed about in the ballads of power metal; you wan’t the barbarians, you want the brutality, you want the corded muscle straining in your faceness of the epics of the late 20th century -- and you want them in a loin cloth and holding an axe. Korgoth, He-Man, Golden Axe, Conan, and so many others had that hard ripping funk -- the real beef, and we are bringing it back with this simple roleplay.
You’re a champion of the Mountain King, a stone cold elder of throbbing mass and wise hard hitting words. Your loyalty to the King is what netted you this most sacred of missions -- to retrieve the vial of the Rainbow Warrior from his eternal crypt so that you may save the Mountain King himself as he lays on his stone cold bed of throbbing headaches, dying of a mysterious illness.
This macguffin won’t be so easy -- if it were, why send a beefy champion such as yourself? NO! You will have to cross the crawling deserts, cut through scrawny wizards, climb the tallest peaks, find your way through the kingdom in the clouds, find the land of light, and best the grave protections of the Rainbow Warrior’s crypt -- and then do it all again on your way back. Are you up to the challenge?
