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“I really never have gotten used to all these extra fingers,
what's a pinky even for? And they’re so damn... stumpy!,”
Basic Information
Full Name: Uthu Bouxaip Uthu Unyp Xichynoxx.
Earthling Alias: Robin Minke Aukes.
Age: One Hundred Eleven.
Meat Suit Physical Age: Twenty Two.
Species: Zetan.
Race/Sub-Species: Green-Yellow Reticulant.
Meat Suit Species: Human.
Meat Suit Race: Caucasian, Dutch.
Class: Alien Pirate Captain.
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral.
Appearance
Meat Suit Height: Six Foot Three.
Meat Suit Weight: One Hundred Forty Nine Pounds.
Meat Suit Hair Color: Platinum, near white Blonde.
Meat Suit Eye Color: Aqua Blue.
Zetan Height: Four Foot Ten.
Zetan Weight: Eighty Nine Pounds.
Zetan Hair Color: Completely Hairless.
Zetan Eye Color: Radiant Radiation Green.
Brief Description
As a Zetan, Noxx was considered to be relatively attractive by the standards of the Reticulant race, of good height and build, with a large cranium, appropriately flared hips, long neck and exceptional finger length, and would have physically met muster for the highly selective breeding requirements of Zetan society. After the splicing process any Reticulant is barred from reproducing, and even upon returning to Zetan society and the physical form of a Zetan will never look or be quite the same, in appearance or genetic makeup. As a, "human," Noxx is something of an oddity. Androgynous is only barely accurate, as it isn't so much a question if the Zetan is male or female, or rather whether Noxx is more masculine or feminine, but that of whether the Zetan is really even all that similar to either gender. Not to say gender neutral, but literally if the Zetan even is possessed of gender whatsoever. The cutting process can only do so much, and general body shape is usually something that cannot easily be altered, leaving the flared hips of the species and not including any sexual organs, or even nipples. Even the flap of skin human men have on their breast is missing from the meat suit grafted upon Noxx. Zetans do not have gender in the same sense of humans, and are technically more closely related to plants than your typical animal on the planet Earth.
Long platinum blonde, near silvery-white hair falls to the Zetan’s mid back when not pinned up, styled with uneven bangs and layers for days, probably by some five hundred dollar a session stylist named Juan Juan but pronounced, “Juh-ooh-ahn,” for no apparent reason in Beverly Hills somewhere, with gleaming aqua eyes almost more turquoise than blue, legs for days exaggerated by the Zetans insistence on hugely ridiculous Versace four inch heels and knee high go-go boots, always leather of course, with curves that seem altogether wrong for any human, neither feminine or masculine, and altogether oddly near rectangular from bust to waist before becoming clearly pear shaped at the hips. Slender build, though with thighs more thick and arms and fingers longer and more thin than one might expect given the rest of the Zetan’s features or those of a normal human with such a build, with a bit of a distended stomach less pronounced given the extra bulk of a human than it is on a Zetan though not unnoticeably so, and facial features neither notably feminine or masculine, pretty though not soft featured by any means, with a slight, only barely noticeable hint of something like a prominent Adam’s apple, and has neither a belly button or finger prints, though Noxx almost always wears gloves anyway.
Personality
Noxx is something of a traditionalist among the Zetans, coupled with an unconventional and uncharacteristically rebellious streak that has a penchant for leading to awkward situations and alienation from the average sheep like Reticulants. A human poacher and literal alien abductor, despite the majority of Zetans along with their governing officials having decided that humanity and the Earth were off limits after the, what translates from Green-Yellow Reticulant to English as, “incredibly, near unbelievably fucked up fuck up,” or as humans know it the Roswell Incident, Noxx is of the belief that humans are simply weird monkey creatures from some backwater planet that can barely get out of its own atmosphere, who may as well be captured and experimented upon or sold to the highest bidder if it nets a profit, quite like how humans look at chimpanzees. Not necessarily any more a villain to Zetans than a human who hunts whales or captures chimpanzees to sell to cosmetics research facilities and zoos would be to their fellow humans, this nonetheless causes the idea of the Zetan to be a somewhat frightening concept to normal human society, that is if they knew of the alien lifeform walking and hunting among their number.
Just as a hunter feels little if any remorse when they tag a deer, and more likely feel a satisfied sense of a job well done and a sated urge for blood if only until next weekend, Noxx does not look at humans any differently than your average person looks at an animal. It isn’t that the Zetan hates humans, or even looks upon them as anything less than any other animal; it is simply that they are, well, animals. Something people who belong to a higher class of being pay for the privilege to hunt, and capitalize upon what resources they can take from them, be it hides, meats, bio-material, or use as an exhibit in zoos or test subjects in research labs. The Yautja seem to understand this, they've been using the strange monkey people for sport for millennia, and they're uncouth barbarians, the Mongols of the civilized universe. Noxx is simply of the belief that things were better a hundred years ago, before the, "proper," Zetans forgot who they were and decided to spend actual resources, Zetan tax payer credits, to try and protect some monkeys just because their livers go for a small fortune in Reticulum. Hell, a hundred years ago Zetans were talking about invading the planet and colonizing it for themselves. Whatever the Zetans have become, Noxx hasn't wanted any part of it for decades.
Some Clarifications on Zetans and Alien Abduction
Some of the more, “paranormal,” abilities attributed to alien abductors are actually attached to their ships, not to the living beings or personally carried technology. Phenomena such as time skips and sudden disappearances and reappearances are considerably simpler than all that, though impossible to achieve without a medium sized vessel powerful enough to exert the kind of energy output required. What actually occurs during these seemingly incredible events is a ship pulls up and activates a large inertia suppression field, no different than those used as personal and site-specific deployable shielding, simply stopping the movement of anything not itself equipped with an inertia suppressor. Time continues to flow, and the rest of the world moves on as normal, it is simply that anything in this bubble has ceased movement of any kind. Fifteen minutes may go by, but planes and cars as well as people cease moving, suspended in place and generally unaware of what is occurring around them. Light continues to shine, though gravity is largely suspended allowing for supposed tractor beam like events of people floating up into space ships and the like, simply point and click and people, objects, whatever gain a lesser version of suppression and float around at the whim of the Zetan preforming the abduction. Once they’re done they take off, the suppression field drops, and ships, planes, and people go on as normal, generally unaware of anything except that their watches have inexplicably stopped ticking.
Aliens are not telepathic, and if they seem to be able to hear what you’re thinking or you can hear them speaking to you without actually being present or having their mouths move it is merely because they have put an implant in your head sending and transmitting electrical signals back and forth through what is essentially short wave radio. Humorously, this is actually blocked out by those crazy homeless people tin foil hats, many of whom were actually abducted at one point or another, usually just because a Zetan somewhere was bored and felt like messing up some perfectly normal human. Often these people are targeted again and again for the hell of it; few are clever enough to actually escape detection for long. The practice is, of course, actually illegal in modern Zetan society, though by no means has that stopped the occasional passerby from carrying on regardless, kind of like cow tipping, but if cows had jobs and lives and you purposefully, invisibly marked the cow so that you could keep tipping the same one repeatedly, but without ever being seen by any of the other cows. The cow targeted keeps saying, “Er meh gerd, these weird hairless tall creatures on two legs came and tipped me over, and now they keep coming back every few years to do it again!!” making the cow look a damn fool to the other cows and slowly driving it insane.
So What Can an Alien Actually Do Without a Ship?
Great question! What can a human do without a friendly spaceship in range on a foreign and hostile planet? Well, it isn’t actually supposed to happen. Like, literally ever. Imagine Star Trek people stuck on some dangerous planet full of semi intelligent apes with machine guns and they’re wandering around clearly not fitting in carrying phasers and not much else in the way of weaponry, and their ship is just not there or likely to return for several years. Well, they are probably not going to last very long. However, on the rare occasion that a pair of boots on the ground is actually necessary Zetans do have a system that has proven reasonably successful for short term deployments, splicing. Extremely dangerous, and literally permanently damaging to their DNA and physical bodies, splicing is a process in which the Zetan, while conscious, has every bone in their body broken, human tissue and bone grafted to the broken bits, set, and then rebroken, until the Zetan has enough flesh and bone and actual human DNA forcefully bonded to their system that they look human enough to get by, and will continue to until the process is reversed, an equally painful and damaging process though necessary to reintegrate in any capacity back into Zetan society.
A Splice’s hair and nails grow naturally, their meat suit physically ages at a rate consistent with the species chosen for the splice, and if the job is done professionally they can be made to truly look and, short of actual full round gene testing, for all intents and purposes be that species, human or otherwise. If the job is rushed in the case of a human splice, they will not have human sex organs, belly buttons or fingerprints, and they will have irregular body types, inspection of any even cursory medical degree instantly revealing them to not be a human in any regular sense. Noxx clearly falls into this category. Of course, even the rushed jobs usually performed by unlicensed cut doctors upon pirates seeking to hide from the Zetan authorities in too little time and with too little training for a proper cut job do the trick well enough that, beyond the occasional jeer and shouted vulgarities the Splice in question may not actually look very normal, but they certainly don’t look like something that when seen walking the streets should be accosted with pitch forks and torches by the local villagers, generally appearing healthy if odd in appearance, and not like some Frankenstein’s Monster, or so the Splice hopes for their own sake.
Well That Doesn’t Sound Very Promising
But wait, there's more! Though those poor Zetans who find themselves stranded in an unforgiving, hostile environment surrounded by strange monkey creatures with machine guns would clearly be unable to defend themselves if discovered to be the alien life forms that they are, they are very capable of keeping from being detected and eradicating most random people that they encounter who might happen to find out. All mid-sized vessels carry blasters in both pistol and rifle variations that fire concentrated bursts of gamma radiation which will go through pretty much anything, only really causing as much damage as a typical .44 though exactly accurate to their sights and completely without recoil, the radiation burst traveling through most anything and carrying on for near a mile before dispersing into non-lethal concentrations, known for causing massive collateral damage though designed for emergency use aboard vessels in case the human or whatever population get rowdy, effective against most any organic life form though completely ineffective against the vessels or the material the Zetan space suits are comprised of, simply slipping off of the suits and walls of a ship like water that meets a large rock in a stream, traveling until it naturally dissipates, meant to be useless in the hands of humans or whatever who might get ahold of them while onboard though still completely effective against the unshielded hairless apes.
Additionally, personal inertia suppression devices serve as something of a temporary, generally momentary force field for protection against ballistic weapons and, if swift enough, even some brute force melee attacks. Nothing like the ship borne inertia suppression fields, given the fact that they are small enough to carry and not exactly cold fusion powered, these devices act intelligently, measuring air pressure, velocity, and other variables to detect if and when they should activate, and upon doing so offer only fleeting blips of shielding, bullets and blades simply ceasing to move in midflight. This is enough to let the Splice know something is trying to kill it, of course, and a get out of jail free card from a random sniper's bullet, but nothing else --, active for a moment and only once or twice in any encounter it is then necessary for the Splice to seek out cover and actually engage in an otherwise normal shoot out. Other uses for the device are primarily utility focused, and it can be used to effectively render gravity’s hold on the Zetan irrelevant in a skin/clothing tight bubble around the Splice for a few seconds, allowing said Zetan to walk on ceilings, leap literally at speed without falling across a city block from one rooftop to another, and most anything else that isn’t going to affect an opponent, though this uses up the same energy the shielding is dependent on, and either or can only be used once or twice per fight.
That Doesn't Sound Too Bad * - See OOC at the bottom of the page for clarification on this section.
Nah, Splices are not push overs in a fight. Of course, there is almost literally nothing that makes a day to day splice any more effective than a slightly lucky human with a .44 that they're good with and some utilitarian body armor. Blocking a single stray bullet isn't anything humans haven't already figured out how to do, though they do as such in considerably less spectacular fashion than Splices, but really without the addition of an attached vessel Zetans lose a lot of what makes their species actually militarily powerful. Mid-sized vessels rarely have actual Zetan soldiers aboard, and are primarily basic science vessels, meant for mid-range research purposes, and not for legitimate warfare. They do not carry mounted death rays or orbital planetary bombardment systems, and the Zetans aboard rarely carry anything more powerful than one or two guardian drones. Of course, nearly all Splices have a guardian drone buried somewhere, but they're essentially six foot flying pyramid headed robots with massive front mounted cannons, so it's not like they walk around in public with the things. If for some reason a particular situation called for one they'd bring it out, but the situation would have to be dire enough to risk exposure and premeditated, if you have a guardian drone buried in a field in the Mid-West and you happen to be violently accosted in Atlanta, it's sure not going to help you much.
Likewise, even those Splices who are not professional, sanctioned, and actually outfitted for the job are equipped with portable, deployable inertia suppression field generators that stand about three feet tall and fold up and out just like those canvas camping chairs, which create a semicircular force field which stops most all matter from crossing it, though still allowing for light, energy and, most importantly for Zetans, gamma radiation such as the concentrated form fired from their typical antipersonnel weapons to pass through, lasting for about a minute. Of course, its stationary once placed and unless used in some tactical manner to block off a single exit or entrance knowing that one’s enemy will have to come through this way it has little use in a committed firefight. Zetans are also equipped with vials of Epoxy, a viscous syrup containing highly concentrated nanobots which can repair both organic and inorganic tissue upon application, typically kept refrigerated and rarely carried unless one knows that they are walking into a fight, as well as an Electro-Suppressor baton, shaped much like, though coincidentally so, a medieval mace which serves as the only real melee weapon of note in use by non-military Zetans, employed generally in the same manner as a cattle prod might be used by humans to shut up the rabble and biological test experiments, though it is far too large to be carried for any general use unless the natives don't mind someone walking around with what appears to be a literal mace.
Background
This shit all started because of fucking ZETA. ZETA!! Zetans for the Ethical Treatment of Animals. Give me a fuckin’ break. A civilization that spans the known universe, and has the capability to wipe entire species off the map, launch asteroids at planets and doom countless worlds without ever having to come within lightyears of their solar systems, and a bunch of pussy ass federals want to spend Zetan tax payer credits to protect hairless monkeys on a backwater planet from the well to do business Zetans who actually pay those brainless officials fuckin’ salaries. If it weren’t for fuckin’ Dydeeq and those blue shrimp the fool couldn’t stop guzzling long enough not to crash a supposedly literally impossible to crash recon vessel in that desert those bastards never would have gotten any attention at all, no one had ever heard of them before that and now look at ‘em. The most powerful special interest group in the literal civilized universe. The advancement of Zetan society literally halted by a single instance of what humans would call driving while under the influence and the reaction of embarrassed Zetans who assumed that they could never be exposed to an inferior species, and couldn’t handle it once they had been.
Some of them actually seem like they look at humans like any other intelligent species, arguing that Zetans were there once and eventually the apes might come to be like any other interstellar civilization, colonizing the planets of their solar system before one day surpassing it, probably heading to Alpha Centauri as they call it in supercarriers the size of continents just as the Zetans once had to their own closest solar systems, before developing a viable faster than light drive and joining the rest of the civilized universe. That’s like saying one day squids might rise up from their shallow tidal pools and start walking on land, wearing suits and working at law firms. Hairless apes will be lucky if they don’t blindly destroy their own planet, can’t get along with one another long enough to get anything done let alone develop the technologies needed to truly traverse the universe. Hell, they can barely pave roads, and what civilization uses diesel engines powering individual vehicles once they’ve developed bullet trains? Sure, the Zetans had used similar vehicles once, millennia ago, for thirty years or so before they realized the things were literally one of the most inefficient means of transportation literally imaginable and developed better technology.
So I picked off a few here and there, where’s the harm in that? I don’t see Zetans defending the squids they so love to eat. Fuckin’ Dydeeq. Always knew that Zetan was trouble, wasn’t sober a single day over here, and there were a lot of years spent in this backward little solar system. Fool manages to crash an impossible to crash recon ship worth tens of millions of credits, totally disgrace the Zetan people, and, in addition, bring about the mechanism for the businesses destruction. I kept at it for decades, of course, under the radar but operating just fine given the circumstances. Mostly avoided detection, made a lot of credits from the price bump, but spent just as much as I was making off the top paying off this Zetan and that Zetan just to get liver and test subjects through customs. After several decades of business going well the ship gets pinged by a Mothership class cruiser, and we all know it’s over. They’ll be on us in three days, and if we move an inch we’re getting roasted. Twenty good Zetans, loyal, true to who our people are, and they’re all going to repatriation centers for the next five to twenty. Of course, they would take me for eighty, a century maybe, effectively a death sentence. They’d make an example of the captain, like they always did, ZETA wants blood with these kinds of things.
So the cut doctor offers to splice me on the fly, says to take the credits on board down to the planet with me and the crew will be back for me and the funds once they’re out. It isn’t something any good Zetan wants, to be spliced I mean, knowing that you will never again truly be a Zetan, even after the reversal your appearance and genetic makeup are permanently changed, but given the alternative there really wasn’t much of a choice. Most painful experience you, me, or anyone else can imagine, the splicing. You have to be conscious and can’t be sedated, something to do with the nerves grafting properly. I think it’s mostly just cruelly painful so more pirates and poachers don’t use it as a convenient way to get out of the repatriation centers, personally. Doc said I died four times on the slab, same one we use for the apes, hadn’t exactly done the process before and certainly wasn’t using the proper tools for the job. Supposedly it would have hurt worse if they had been the proper tools. Don’t remember much but white, searing, cutting, burning laser scalpels… Bad time, that, best not dwelled upon.
So the tech officer cooks me up an identity using a randomly generating algorithm, much more advanced than anything humans have available and virtually untraceable unless someone actually wanted to check into whether or not Mrs. Jean Harrison actually had a student named Robin in her first grade class fifteen years ago, hands me my papers and they have me shuttle down in a pod with a gear bag and a guardian drone, wearing some ill-fitting clothing we took off of an ape a day before and hadn’t gotten around to disposing. Embarrassing thing entering through the atmosphere like a barbarian, falling and burning and causing a scene rather than simply causing the ship to be in atmosphere with inertia suppressors, but necessary so as to avoid detection, landing somewhere in North America and gradually making my way down the line of big city to big city, waiting for word from the right Zetans and ducking anything else that might happen to be looking for me, generally taking what I want from the hairless apes and getting by day to day, somehow always managing to get stuck in traffic just like all the other people. Just a few more years of this, maybe a decade tops. Hopefully.
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OOC
* - Yes, Noxx has a badass guardian drone, a deployable force field generator, Electric Mace/Baton beating stick thing, and what is essentially a super rejuvenation potion, but will not be bringing them to fights unless agreed upon beforehand and presumably to be used against a supernaturally powerful opponent, this is intentional so as to allow the character the capability to scale in power with a potential opponent so as not to be locked into only being able to be used in threads against your basic tier one human with a pistol and some body armor. Not that there is anything wrong with having a character who is locked into a certain type of competition, but I figured hey, since Noxx has basically no character specific abilities like throwing fireballs, being a robotic wrastler’, some peak of human physicality type or anything like that, and the Zetan’s entire power level is really dependent on what advanced technology happens to be on hand at any given time, without any tech Noxx could literally be taken down by any decent hand to hand combatant, why not have some buried super-tech that could allow for scaling power level down the line. Fight a tier one today, something supernatural or heavily sci-fi the next, and back to tier one the third time around, or so my thought process went when developing Noxx.
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