[IC] Secrets: Nathan and James/Jess' Story

[karamonnom]

Saturday, March 25th

It has been about two weeks since the whole Kylie fiasco and it seemed that life was moving on. Kylie had been sent somewhere to get help, the Reese's family had hired a new girl for the diner, and things were running more smoothly. Nathan felt bad about the whole thing but could do no more than lend his best friend an ear if he felt like ranting. On the up side, Melissa was a great help to the diner which left James with more free time to relax and hang out. In fact, Nathan was just about to invite James over to his apartment. It's been a long time since James' last visit and it was way too awkward to hang around the Reese's place.

Nathan had woken up at 9:00 a.m., which was pretty early for a Saturday morning. He was unsure of whether or not his friend was awake, but decided to text him anyways. "Hey, want to come over if you're free today? I have nothing to do," he texted. After he finished doing his morning routine, he looked around the apartment to see if he should clean up a little. It'd be rude to have a messy apartment when you're inviting someone over. And even if James wasn't coming, he should probably do some spring cleaning anyways.

There were some dirty dishes on the floor along with some empty ramen containers. It wasn't too bad... but maybe he should also vacuum the place, just in case. He took the dirty dishes and put them in the sink to wash later. Then he grabbed the empty ramen containers and threw them into his trash bag which was dangerously full. "Guess I should take out the trash while I'm at it," he thought to himself. He somehow managed to tie the trash bag up and carry it to the dumpster out back. Once he got back inside, he went to look for his vacuum cleaner in his closet. He hadn't vacuumed in an embarrassingly long time so it took him a while to dig it out from behind all his other junk.

"Aha!" he exclaimed as he finally found it. He plugged it into the wall outlet and began to vacuum. When he had finished, he wiped some sweat from his forehead. Now all he had to do was spray some Febreze and do the dishes and then he'd be done. He went to the kitchen-area of his apartment and poured himself some orange juice. All that 'work' had made him thirsty. As he drank his juice, he wondered if James had gotten his text yet...

[Saint Girralo]

Jessica was having the most wonderful dream she had ever had, and loathed waking up today. She had dreamed that she was on a beach somewhere, with a man and she was smiling at him and he was smiling back. They seemed so happy together, he was so cute and he seemed so familiar too. Where did she know him from? But before she could identify him, it all slipped away, torn from her by the alarm she set so she could get to work on time. Blinking her tired eyes open, she forced herself out of bed, rolling off the edge of her bed onto to the floor and her false breasts. She didn't realize how close she was to the edge of her bed, and she rubbed her chest to sooth the pain as much as possible. As short a distance as it actually was, it was more the unexpectedness of the fall that caught her off guard.

"Ow. I can only imagine how much more that'll hurt when they're real." she complained quietly. It was just after six, and she had about half an hour before she needed to head upstairs for her shower. Trying to keep in shape and healthy, she started up a video on her computer and began practice with the Tree pose, holding for the recommended time before shifting into the Extended Triangle Pose. She followed along shifting through various poses for half an hour, allowing a thin layer of sweat to start gathering on her brow and breast. But knowing she had to start getting ready for work, she got undressed and wiped her falsies clean, before grabbing his work clothes and wrapping a towel around his waist.

James was back and he went upstairs to grab a quick shower. He had just shaved last night so he didn't need to do much that morning other than to get clean after exercising. As soon as the water had warmed up, he removed the towel and began scrubbing the dirt and sweat from his body. It had felt amazing how much better he was already starting to feel. Had he known, he'd have started yoga a long time ago and he'd be more prepared for when he never had to switch back to being James. As he worked his way up to his hair, he noticed it was starting to get fairly long, and he couldn't help but smile as he started rubbing the shampoo in. He rinsed the shampoo out and turned the water off, starting to dry off. He sighs. His time in the shower is one of the most relaxing parts of his and her day.

Time skip -- 8:45 AM

Work is passing by without issue, which has been a rare event since their parents died. It was only a few weeks ago that Elliot had returned to Millington, and since his sister was taken off for some severe psychological help. She tried to commit suicide by cop in the family restaurant after Riley and Sophia started waving some flash drive around. He had nearly broken down from stress those next few days, only holding on by a thread. He was devastated, his family was falling apart around him and he didn't know what to do to help. He didn't like feeling helpless like that and all the anxiety was still near the surface. Melissa had done quite well with her training and would be in at ten that morning, Mark on the other hand was already in, running orders from the kitchen to the tables.

During a quiet moment, James got a text from Nathan, asking him to come over if he was available. If Sophi came out to the floor during the rushes, Mark and Melissa would be able to handle it. He was about to respond when another set of guests arrived to be seated, which he quickly handled. He then processed the payments of several regulars that were leaving. As soon as things stabilized again he pulled his phone out and shot a text over to Nathan, Yeah, I'd like that, I have to wait until Melissa gets in at ten first so Mark has backup in case he needs it, but after that I'll be on my way. Having sent the text off he greeted the next set of customers who were just walking through the door. It wouldn't be that much longer before he could leave.

[karamonnom]

Nathan had began to start doing some of the dishes when his phone went off. Not wanting to get his phone yet, he decided to finish washing the dishes and dried his hand on a towel before checking his phone. "Great, I'll see you later." he had texted back. He was glad that James had agreed to come over. He wanted to talk about Vanessa and Rachel. Mostly about how he was thinking about ending things with Rachel. While she was a nice girl, he just didn't feel anything more than a baseless physical attraction and her ditsy personality drove him crazy at times. It wouldn't be fair to either of them if he just kept going with that. While he was enjoying the fact that he was finally seeing a girl for the first time since he graduated from high school, he'd prefer to find a girl who would keep him on his toes, someone who really understood him.

On the other hand, ending things with Rachel will probably fuck things up between James and Vanessa. Perhaps the girls weren't as petty as that, but if James had a real shot with a girl, Nathan wouldn't want to be the one to screw it up. Plus, Vanessa would probably end up beating him up for hurting her best friend. Maybe the easiest thing for him to do was to scare Rachel off with his dirty little secret. It would probably send her running for the hills, but Millington was a small town. Word would spread and who would want anything to do with him if they found out? Better not say a word.

Nathan sighed as he thought about everything. He forgot all the drama that came with seeing someone. He was hoping that James would give him some decent advice or maybe ask Vanessa about how Rachel felt to gauge out where this was all going.

Nathan was startled when his phone went off again. However, instead of a reply from James, he had gotten a text from Rachel.

"Hey sweetie! Are you free today? Do you want to take me shopping?" the text had read.

Well, it was a good thing that he had made plans. "Sorry... James is coming over. We're having a bro-afternoon," he texted her back in a matter of seconds.

"Aw... fine... I'll go with my other friends then. Have fun! Miss you! XOXO"

"Uhhuh, I will. You have fun too."

He wondered if she had noticed that his texts had been lacking lately. If she had, she hadn't made a big deal about it. But it was a pretty good hint that he was no longer into her.

Aware that he still had some time before James to arrive, he went back to his room and laid in his bed for a moment. He began to play some music on his phone as he waited.

"I think I'm done fooling around. Geez, I'd never thought I'd ever think that but maybe I should focus on starting something serious," he sighed to himself. "And I should get rid of that nasty habit of mine." He glanced over towards his closet that had a lock on it to ensure that no one would ever see what was behind the door. But he knew that it was going to be hard to for him to quit, not when he enjoyed himself too much.

[Saint Girralo]

Secrets

James knew that since it had been a while since he had last talked to Nathan, he was likely to get asked how things were going between him and Vanessa. Truthfully, they had agreed from the very beginning that they weren't overly interested in a relationship with each other. But they were still friends and they were happy with just that. They didn't want to drag Nathan and Rachel down though, so they let the couple assume. Vanessa was happy watching her best friend being happy and James was happy watching Nathan being happy. What was bothering them was what they were seeing between the two. From what Vanessa had told him, despite Rachel putting some effort in, it seemed a bit forced. And even James knew forcing a relationship would only end in disaster.

James was glad that they finally had extra hands at the diner so he could do something like this on occasion. The entire family had been working itself into the ground to make up for the fact that Kylie was taken in for psychiatric treatment. Granted it's not like she really helped out a lot. It did, however, allow for the others to get extra sleep with Kylie's games not running and waking people up all night long. But that was still little consolation when they were missing an integral part of their lives. He needed to unwind and maybe going out and hanging with Nathan would provide the much needed relief he needed. He really could only hope.

As the clock turned over to ten, Melissa walked through the door like clockwork. She was in uniform and looked like she was prepared for the job, she was becoming very dependable. "Hey Mark, when you get a moment, I'd like to talk to you." he said. Mark nodded as he picked up an order from the kitchen, quickly delivering it to the correct table. When Mark walked over to the Host Stand, James leaned over and said to him, "I'm going to take the day off. I'm feeling a bit burnt out. You mind taking over for the day?

"Sure. Just tell Sophi first so she knows." "Of course. I wouldn't imagine doing otherwise. Thanks" he said as he began walking to the office. Mark was a great guy, and had his back even before his parents died, but he still wasn't quite a friend. He opened the door to the office and peaked his head inside, and told Sophi that he was going to take the day off. It wasn't often that James took days off, and even then he usually needed to so it wasn't too hard to convince her to allow it. After getting permission he clocked out and made his way to the bus stop and sat down pulling out his phone. Which Bus do I want to get one coming from the diner?

[karamonnom]

I lost my head in San Francisco
Waiting for the fog to roll out
But I found it in a rain cloud
It was smiling down

The song was briefly interrupted as a notification rang out from his phone. He groaned, hoping it was not from Rachel. Much to his relief, it was James who had texted him. "Has it really been that long since you last came? Take route 34, fourth stop."

Nathan sighed as he put his phone back down and the song continued playing. James would probably be here in about fifteen minutes. Speaking of James, his birthday was coming up in less than a month. He had better figure out before then what to get for his best friend of forever. When they were younger, Nathan had given him CD's and random shirts that his mom helped him choose out. But now that James was turning 21, maybe the best present Nathan could give him was a wild night out. It'd be fun even though Nathan himself wouldn't be legally allowed to drink yet. Maybe they would go to a strip club like Nathan had always jokingly suggested. Well, he'll ask James himself to see how he wanted to spend his big day. Perhaps James would rather spend his birthday with his family. Nathan could respect that. Or maybe James would spend the day with Vanessa. Did Vanessa even know when James' birthday was?

After about who knows how long he had spent daydreaming and five songs later, he figured that James would probably be here soon. He went to the bathroom and ruffled his already messy hair. He then washed his face one more time to help him feel more awake. He put his glasses back on and walked over to the 'living room'. Waiting for someone to come over was really boring and he hoped that James would be knocking on the door any second now.

[Saint Girralo]

When Nathan asked if it had really been that long since he had last been to his place, James let out a small, cute little laugh. His best friend was so adorably oblivious sometimes, and it really would do them some good to hang out with each other. He knew he needed to get out and socialize more, but he had ended up so bogged down with the diner that it all got pushed to the side. That was entirely the reason why he was taking the day off! He definitely needed the break, to unwind after the near disaster that occurred with that terrible stunt Kylie pulled. It had built up on his chest and he was finally ready to let the stress go.

When the bus pulled up to take him to his friend's apartment, he stepped on and quietly sat down. He didn't want to cause any trouble, he just wanted to move on with his life, with her life. She wrapped her arms around herself as tightly as she could, and seemingly shrunk into herself. Despite everything, Jessica leaned into the wall of the bus and sobbed lightly, despite not wanting to. She was tired of lying to everyone, well everyone except Olivia, but she was sworn to secrecy on this herself. She was tired of lying, but she was so scared of what everyone else would think, and she didn't want to lose anyone.

As she drew closer to Nathan's apartment, Jess sat up and wiped her eyes clear of tears. She looked down at her body, looking like James, and she sighed. She unwrapped her arms from herself as she stood up, anticipating the arrival of the bus to the correct stop. Walking out of the bus, James moved toward the apartment complex, and texted Nathan, Just got off the bus, on my way up. He was pretty sure he remembered which apartment his best friends was in and entered and made his way to the second floor. Knocking on door 2AM, he stood there waiting, hoping he wasn't about to embarrass himself.

[karamonnom]

Nathan's soon phone went off and he had gotten a text from James saying that he just got off the bus. Before Nathan could even respond, there already was a knock on the door. A goofy smile reached his face as he got up and answered the door. "Welcome Princess to my humble home," he said with a bow. He had left the door open and left some space to let James in. Afterwards, he shut and locked the door behind them.

"Feel free to make yourself at home. Sit down. Do you want anything to drink? Water? Juice? Soda? Beer?" Nathan asked as he walked over to the kitchen. "Or are you hungry? I don't really have much food though." He didn't really have people over that often, but he always did his best to be hospitable. As he waited for James' response, he poured himself a cup of water.

[Saint Girralo]

1x1

When Nathan opened the door, James couldn't help but smile. "Apparently it hasn't been long enough to forget the right apartment number." James joked as he stepped inside his friend's place when his friend offered him something to drink, he was surprised that Nathan listed beer. James didn't drink at all he was underage, and so was Nathan. James scoffed, "I'll be fine with water. It's a little to early for the beer to come out yet." He made his way over to the kitchen to pull out a cup and poured himself some water after Nathan finished pouring his. As soon as it was filled, he made his way to the living room and sat down on the couch.

"So what have you been up to these past couple of weeks? I've been trying not to pull my hair out from all the shit that's been going on with Kylie, and the Diner. Part of why I'm glad you texted." He asked as he took a sip from the cup of water. His best friend probably only had the vaguest of ideas how close he was to going grey so early in his life. Yeah, I'd like not to be grey before I'm in my thirties He was running on five hours of sleep a day this past week, dealing with Jerry and the court and the diner and cleaning at the house and still letting Jess out to be herself. He let out a large sigh, and leaned his head back, staring at the ceiling.

"Why does it feel like everything is just falling apart around me?" He asked, just so frustrated he didn't even care that he asked aloud, even though he only meant to ask himself.

[karamonnom]

"Oy, I could've poured you some. You are my guest afterall," Nathan said as James began to pour himself some water as well. But it was too late to do anything about it so he took his own cup and sat down next to his best friend on the couch. He took a sip of water as James began to talk. His friend seemed to be very stressed out with the whole Kylie and the diner thing. He watched as his friend leaned his head back and sighed heavily. Nathan placed an arm around James in attempt to comfort him. "Hey... Things will get better. I mean, we still have our whole lives ahead of us. And I'll always be here to lend you a hand if you need it." He then ruffled his best friend's hair. Was James' hair always this long? Maybe he should get a hair cut soon.

"So relax and talk to me. Or if you don't feel like talking, that's fine too. I could do all the talking if you want." Nathan added. For the entire time that they have been friends, Nathan had learned that James kept to himself a lot. It never bothered him though. If he wanted to talk, he could. Maybe that's why they had drifted their first year of college. But things were slowly changing. James slowly began to talk more about himself and Nathan was there to listen but never to pry.

"Ugh... Anyways... I texted you because I was thinking of breaking up with Rachel. What should I do?" groaned Nathan. His problems seemed trivial compared to James', but some advice would still be nice.

[Saint Girralo]

James sat there as his best friend wrapped his arm around his back, and began playing with his hair. A light flush came to his face when this happened, it wasn't expected, but it was nice. He knew Nathan cared about his well being and would always be there, but he didn't know how he would react if he told Nathan about Jessica. He almost let it all come flooding out in a brief moment of frustration before Nathan continued on, saying he was planning on breaking up with Rachel. Both he and Vanessa had seen the signs that things were well in the rough for the relationship, but it was still surprising that it came so quickly.

"Wow, I mean I could see things were a bit forced, but I didn't know things were that bad. Or are there other reasons? But if it's what you think is best, don't let me try to talk you out of it, I'm not exactly someone who is in a position to give out relationship advice." he offered, trying to be supportive. "Looks like I'm going to owe Vanessa a twenty. She had bet you guys wouldn't make it to a month, and I said that you guys would. Oh well." he snorted.

"Anyway, it's just that with all the shit that's been going on lately, I've been trying to deal with all the stress. And at times I'm not sure how I'm even getting by. I've been dealing with all this stress for most of my life and it feels like everything is catching up to me again. I'm just so tired." he groaned, leaning into the hand messing with his hair slightly.

[karamonnom]

"Wooaaah. You should have told me money was on the line. So you're saying that I should break up with her until after the month," Nathan joked. He leaned back into the couch and sighed. "Nah, she's great. It's just... She's not what I'm looking for," he admitted. "Alright... I guess I have to break the news to her I guess..."

Nathan wasn't used to dumping girls. Usually it was the other way around, if he was able to get a girlfriend in the first place. Now that he thought about it, he hadn't been serious about a girl, ever. He supposed that was a consequence of hitting on anything wearing a skirt. He sighed once more. Fortunately, James began to talk about his problems again thus changing the location of the pity party.

"I feel ya, man. Things have been extra rough on you lately," Nathan said sympathetically. "But we're going to unwind right now! Alright. A chill day with Nathan and Netflix. Not to be mistaken with 'Netflix and Chill', mind you. And you get to choose whatever show you want to watch! I know, I'm so generous."

Nathan quickly grabbed the remote to turn on the t.v. He then set it up so Netflix was on. He then handed the remote over to James to let him choose. "Seriously, anything you want. I'll even watch Mean Girls if you wanted."

[Saint Girralo]

Jessica smiled when Nathan said he wouldn't mind watching Mean Girls that's what she wanted. He didn't know about Jess or that it was actually one of her favorite movies and didn't say anything about it. Instead she popped on The Avengers, it had been so long since she had seen it. She smiled as the introduction started, and began thinking as Natasha Romanov was introduced that she was probably the only one she could relate to. Not being able to have children, so easily acting as someone she's not, not being able to... Snapping herself out of that line of thought, she remembered something incredibly crucial to an awesome movie experience. Turning to Nathan she asked, "Is there anything to snack on?" It wasn't going to ruin everything if there wasn't any, but it would make it better if there was.

She took a sip of her water and paused the movie as she waited for an answer. She had to distract herself from her line of thought. She wasn't overly hungry, but she knew continuing down that line of thought would only add to her stress and that's exactly what today was about avoiding. She was here to hang out with her best friend even if he didn't know the truth. 'Perhaps it's time to start telling the truth' she thought to herself as she went and got comfortable on the couch. 'Only him and Olivia for now. I don't think I can tell anyone else yet.'

[karamonnom]

Nathan smiled as James had chosen to watch Avengers. He was a pretty big superhero nerd, but everyone knew that. It didn't take long for James to ask about snacks. "Of course! Do you want chips? Or I can heat up some popcorn? Maybe some soda would be good too," he said while walking towards the kitchen again. Much to his delight, James had paused the movie as they were going to choose some snacks.

For himself, he got a bag of BBQ chips and a coke. He also felt like popcorn was a good idea so he placed a package of it into the microwave for a minute. He then poured the popcorn into two bowls, one for him and one for James. "Uh.. did you want anything else?" he asked while placing everything onto the coffee table in front of them.

James looked like he was pretty out of it today. Zoning out a lot too. "James? Are you sure you're alright? I think something is seriously on your mind. I don't want to pry... but maybe you should tell me. I mean, if you can't tell me, who can you tell right?" he asked, looking into his best friend's eyes.

[Saint Girralo]

Jess was happy to hear that there were snacks available, and was about to reach over and grab some of the popcorn her best friend had brought out. However she stopped in her tracks when Nathan asked if everything was alright. Asking if she wanted to talk about it? She just froze, paling slightly from being caught off guard like that. After a second or two she managed to shake it off. She didn't know what to say, she couldn't afford to lose her best friend, one of only a handful of friends. Her oldest friend.

I... I can't tell you." She eventually said. "Not right now. Soon, but not right now." A hint of fear and anxiety creeping in on the edge of her voice. "I..." Her voice gave out and she kinda shrunk into herself. She was tired of lying to her best friend of all people, and even though she made a promise to tell him it still weighed on her. She hadn't felt so vulnerable for since Olivia discovered the truth and before that when she came out to her parents. And she lost her parents before she could find more support, which indirectly did a lot of damage to her self esteem. She felt alone even when surrounded by family and friends and she didn't want to go back to that.

[karamonnom]

"Oh... it's okay," Nathan said dejectedly. He understood that even though they were best friends, they didn't have to share everything with each other. Nathan, himself, had his own share of secrets. But it still kind of hurt. Did he not trust him? Or did he not think that Nathan would help him out? Had Nathan not been a very good friend to him? There was that short time when they had drifted apart... were they not the same after that?

Before the conversation could continue any longer, he had pressed the play button on his remote and the movie was un-paused. Every once in a while he would take a handful of popcorn and take a sip of his drink, but his mind was everywhere except for on the movie. He really wanted to know what James was hiding from him. Millions of thoughts went through his head as he tried to think of all the possibilities that it could be. Maybe he was in danger and didn't want to endanger Nathan as well. Or maybe he had a secret life and was already married with kids. Or maybe he was a drug addict who was too afraid to admit that he had a problem.

Before he knew it, the movie had ended and he had not paid attention to a single minute of it. To be fair, he had watched the movie like twenty times already, but still. At least the couple hours that the movie lasted was enough time for him to regain some composure. "What do you want to do now?" he asked as the credits rolled by. "We could play some video games or continue binge-watching stuff like Avengers 2."

[Saint Girralo]

Jess could tell that things weren't exactly smoothed out when she said she couldn't tell him just yet. It hurt to see the hurt that was clearly there in his eyes. He was only one of two people left that she trusted, but it still didn't change the fact that she was afraid. Not so much that he would hurt her, but that he would push her away. That he'd call her a freak, a liar, attention whore. The same scenarios that have played out in her head for the past six or seven years. Even more so after she learned the truth about herself. He was one of her brothers as far as she cared. When he simply hit play on the movie, she curled up on the opposite end of the couch, only barely watching the movie.

When it ended, and Nathan asked what she wanted to do next, she froze again. "I think... I think I can tell you the truth. I am scared of telling you because you're practically my brother, and I've lost too much family lately. I'm not sure if I can lose anyone else. I... I'm t... I'm still too scared of losing you to say it." she said as she sat up and pulled her knees to her chest. "Promise me you still be there for me, please. she finally managed to say, her voice barely holding out to tell him. It was much the same way when she told her parents, being so scared to tell them, and making them promise to still have her back before she could work up the nerve to tell them.

[karamonnom]

Nathan was caught off guard by James' sudden decision to tell him the truth. Of course, that was only if Nathan had promised to still be there for him. Did he even need to ask? Nathan couldn't imagine a single scenario when he would not be friends with James. "I promise. We'll always be best friends. Nothing could ever change that," he reassured his friend. He had noticed that James had curled himself up and was looking very vulnerable. Girlish even. Especially now that his hair had grown so long.

He waited patiently for him to get the courage to tell him whatever he was hiding from him. For extra moral support, he placed one of his arms around him and rubbed his shoulders. "Please tell me..." he added, trying to look into James' eyes.

[Saint Girralo]

Jess couldn't help but let a tear roll down her cheek as Nathan promised to stick by her side no matter what. She felt like such a terrible friend. When Nathan put his arm around her she kinda leaned into it. He felt so warm. She sat there for a few minutes trying to get her mind organised and her breathing steady. She felt safe like when her father held her in his arms for the first time after she told her parents. There's no way he could hold her so caring like and not be honest about still being there after. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you sooner. It's hard not to be scared of people's reactions. All the stories out there."

"A lot of my stress is from all of the issues with the diner, making sure the house is paid up, and normal and 'abnormal' sibling antics. I'm sure Kylie has given me a few grey hairs these past few weeks." She started explaining, despite practically growling in frustration towards the end. Then she sighed. "But even all that is nothing compared to the stress I've gone through already. The stress and anxiety and depression I've been struggling with since I was about fourteen. There was a good chunk of time where I even wanted to take the "one step shortcut" from the roof of the mall. I even figured out how to get up there without getting caught. And before you start worrying about that, I'm no longer at that kind of point. I haven't been since I figured it out. The reason for the stress, the anxiety, the depression. The truth is... I'm transgender. I... I..." she said, closing her eyes in anticipation of the worst, tears leaking from corners of the closed lids.

[karamonnom]

Nathan would be lying if he said that he was not caught off guard by his friend's confession. But he could understand where he... or rather she was coming from. Their town was not exactly a LBGT community and letting people know had their consequences. However, it did explain a lot of "James" weird behavior at times. It was probably why he went so long without getting a hair cut.

He saw the tears welling up in her eyes and pulled her in for a tighter hug. "Hey, it's okay. I'm still here. Nothing's changed," he whispered while stroking her hair. "I've always knew you were a princess," he could not help but tease.

He held her tightly until she had calmed down. Once her tears had dried up, he pulled back and gave her a gentle smile. "Thank you for telling me...Um... What should I call you then?" he asked, curious of his friend's new name. "Oh and I have something that might cheer you up... If you promise not to judge me for this either..." he added, deciding to reveal a secret of his own.

He led James/Jess to his room. He took a deep breath and got out a key to his closet door. "So uh... again... please don't think I'm weird..." he said awkwardly. He had never shared his secret with anyone, but this was kind of different. He slowly opened the door to reveal a room filled with girls clothing, accessories, and wigs. "...I'm... kind of a crossdresser." he admitted finally.

[Saint Girralo]

As Jessica let the tears start flowing down her cheeks she, she was surprised to feel Nathan pull her in closer. The warmth of the embrace, how truly caring and calming it was. She couldn't help but start relaxing in his arms, but at the same time she felt truly awful for distrusting her best friend of all people. It did help with him telling her that he was still there, that nothing has changed. She even smiled slightly when he said that he always knew she was a princess. I told you She lost track of how long she stayed like that, and it wasn't until Nathan pulled away that she realised that she understood that she did have feelings for her best friend. But it would be a nightmare trying to get that to work out right now. She at least wanted to start hormone treatment before she worked on a relationship.

She was shocked that Nathan asked for the name she chose for herself, but not entirely. She was about to answer when Nathan pulled her to her feet and started pulling her toward the bedroom asking for her not to judge him. "I have no reason to think badly of you unless you're a murderer or something like that. Not after how supportive you've been." But when Nathan opened his closet and revealed the clothes and wigs and accessories, she immediately closed in on the closet and began looking closely at everything. "Do you stuff the bra or do you have falsies?" She asked nonchalantly, moving on to looking at the dresses and skirts.