Night dripped with quiet contentment across the vast dune sea. Scattered remnants of triumphs and tragedies littered the sands like bespeckled jewels as he skirted past. Whilst lining the heavens, a fiery ascent showed bright orange within the unwavering stars, the silent watchers. His adopted sanctuary. Up and up it went and to where none could say for sure. It was perhaps the final stairway to paradise, taking the chosen to a better place. A place not even he could fully perceive. Had that been how Seihdhara had been viewed?
Now the way was faded, giving in to the immeasurable dark, just as that fiery goddess had left the world colder. Now none could now leave such as she. The only respite any had who dared look up, was that the night was cool and it would be the only comfort for those left behind in that desert. For with the sun would come the oppressive heat. The life sapper, the energy drainer. For such had been life in those sands since their conception, he knew. Save the blessed gift she had given to parched throats. Sweet water from natural springs, the lifeblood of all in their oasis respites. Now nearly spent.
No wonder she sent them away.
He had long questioned his perception of reality. Lost among the stars. Even time had been a mere memory for him. He had forgotten how it had worked. Now, as he walked upon the sands fscing the rising sun, feeling every grain amidst his toes, it dawned upon him that time had passed. A great deal of it. Not everything was the same, nor had everything changed in his absence. His long absence. Even in that moment under the stars, guilt wracked him. Every fiber of his being felt it. Coming back had let it all flood back in, as if it had ever really left. It was now more apparent than ever before, his great failing. The scar that would never heal. But that was known. For now he could set things right. As he should have from the very beginning.
And he would start by mending a rift with the one who he had at last answered. The one he cradled in his arms even as he walked. The one who he had never stopped thinking about. The one whose kindness had seen past the monster, into the very heart of a twisted thing. And she had seen something. The smallest inkling capable of greatest change. He could not hold back a small smile. How foolish this Goddess had been. She had, of course, been right.
“Aella.” he murmured, listening to her soft breathing. A weakness gripped her still, one that worried him. Morning light caressed her features and with it his perception anchored and the very land changed before them. A salty breeze hit him and his feet felt a wetter sand. Not as fine as the desert but equally longing. A seabird cried amidst the gentle lapping of the waves. As infinite as sand the ocean stared back at him, deep as it was blue.
The light here was brighter, reflecting from the water. It dazzled Aella’s features and he wanted to speak her name again, to wake her. But he did not. Whether out of fear or apprehension… He shook his head. He would wait for her to wake, to look into the very depths of her soul and utter the words he had long known to be the only thing he could say to her. If it took until the very world would crack and turn to dust he would still wait. It was only right, there upon the beach of their arrival, so very long ago.
The sun had risen well above the horizon by the time Aella stirred. She twitched two times, until she finally brought her hands to her temple and rubbed her head, brow furrowed.
It took her but a moment to realize that she was being carried, and with that realization came a jolt and a gasp so sudden that she was almost dropped. Her wings outstretched nearly completely, one of them going far out and the other finding itself half buried in the sand beneath her, feathers disheveled like never before.
“What-” Aella sneezed and coughed in surprise, her usual glow slowly returning as her eyes fluttered open and stared at the one carrying her. “You’re- No, it can’t be…” She rubbed her eyes once more and sighed. How far had she fallen, that she’d started seeing apparitions? Or maybe… ”Did the Many Masked God send you? If he did, then taking on this visage is… Distasteful. He’s been dead for hundreds of years.” Had her senses been working properly then, she wouldn’t have said such things. But as things stood, she counted herself lucky to even be able to maintain her current body alive after her latest display of power.
The man holding her said nothing but stared into her eyes, faintest hints of pupils within his gleaming white eyes. His ashen face was smooth and clean, just starting to show signs of age and it seemed so familiar. There was a hint of a soft smile upon his lips, one of relief or of etched weariness. The ocean breeze ruffled his short black hair and she became aware of his white tunic, the same color as his eyes. He still said nothing and it was as if he was searching for something with his intense gaze.
The longer they stared at each other, the more that Aella relaxed. First, her expression, then her body, until finally she let out a breath she wasn’t aware she’d been holding and gently disengaged herself from the man’s arms, wobbly legs barely managing to hold her upwards. He made no move to keep her held but he seemed to slightly shiver once she looked again. ”... You look different than I remember. Can’t be one of them... It’s really you? I thought you…” Aella trailed off. What was she supposed to say? What if this person actually wasn’t the one she wanted them to be? What if he wasn’t Larwen? In this age, she couldn’t afford to make herself look like any more of a fool. ”... I thought you died on that altar. Two hundred and thirty seven years, four months, and fifteen days ago. Like me.”
He didn’t seem to be about to say anything, so Aella took the moment to look around and recognized the place. She hadn’t been there for a long time. ”This place… The memories… None of the New Gods know of it. It’s really you, isn’t it? Larwen.” Aella said quietly and looked away. She didn’t want him to see her in such a weak and pathetic state, nor did she want him to see her teary eyes or hear her thumping heart. Her hair fell over her face to act as a curtain. Goodness, she thought, when had she become so full of shame? She gave her wings a small flap and covered her face with her hands.
She’d dreamed of it for so long, of meeting Larwen once more and being able to go back to that hidden grove, resting in the shade of their creation’s canopy. She’d dreamed of it as a regal, magnificent encounter, where she was dressed in her best attire, her glow at its apex, and her grace intact. Instead, there she was… crying quietly to herself with her face hidden and shoulders slumped forward, dressed in a burned out life-regulating jumpsuit and with dried blood smeared all over her face.
His fingers weaved through her hair and a warm hand planted itself upon her left cheek. His thumb wiped away one of her tears and he at last spoke, his voice like a page out of a very fond book. “I have seen so many things amongst the stars and yet, that which found me so long ago, has never had any comparison in my heart.” he breathed, “Aella… ” A finger moved part of the hair from her face, tucking it behind her ear which prompted her to lower her hands and look up at him, fresh tears still flowing. “Oh Aella.” he whispered and pulled her into his chest, wrapping his arms tight around her. “I am so sorry.”
Aella didn’t return the embrace with her arms, but with her wings. For the first time in ages, she felt like she was safe. ”No Larwen, I am sorry. When you left, I made myself the promise that I’d build a peaceful world to meet you upon your return, but instead… Well, things did not go to plan. So instead of coming back to a big welcome party, you find me slumped over on the verge of a mortal’s death in the middle of a desert of my own making, wearing a ruined artifact created by my children, and inhabiting a body that can only handle a shadow of my former power.”
“I… The Aella you knew, Larwen, was an idealist. She died hundreds of years ago, alone, on an altar in the middle of nowhere, and now this world’s stuck with me, a Goddess of Light who can only save people from behind the cover of shadows. I’m… Not worthy of you and neither is this war-torn world. You shouldn’t have come back. I’m sorry.” Aella confessed and with that weight taken off her shoulders, she felt a surge of strength inside her heart, allowing her to rest her hands and head against Larwen’s chest.
“And yet,” he said softly, “You still save them. Despite it all.” He squeezed a little tighter, as if he was afraid she might disappear. “Aella,” he whispered, “You are worth more to me than all of the grains of sand upon this world and all of the oceans of stars outside it. You will never be alone again. I am here now and I shall not leave you. I promise." He ran a hand through the back of her hair, rubbing with tenderness. "The only thing I ever expected of you upon my return, was that you would be here. A selfish request on my part but one I am most thankful for." He paused and then said, "When I heard your voice again I thought myself dreaming upon an invisible current. I had no true purpose but reflection and long did I reflect in the void. You have anchored me back, Aella. Thank you."
Aella pulled away, sniffled, and gave Larwen a half-smile. ”I waited so long to hear that.” Then, Aella looked out at the beach, the waves, the rays of orange-yellow light reflecting off the surface of the ocean… And closed her eyes and took a deep breath, only opening them after exhaling a few seconds later. Not everything was tainted by war here, and if places like these could exist after hundreds of years of being on the backfoot then perhaps she had not completely failed to preserve the peace and beauty of this new world. ”It makes me happy to hear your voice say those words, Larwen. They bring life to a dying heart.”
With one last look at the peacefulness of the beach, she turned back to Larwen with a renewed soft glow about her form. ”There is much work to be done, Larwen. Your children have been alone and rotting for centuries and need your presence to guide them to a fruitful future, and after that, the realms will be in need of a new Guardian. Are you ready to engage with this world once more, beloved brother?” Aella asked as she walked a few steps to the edge of the water and knelt down to wash her face.
“I always told myself I would be prepared. I believe those words still but,” He hesitated, looking to the sand, “Now I am not so certain. It is one thing to think about doing the right thing, to tell yourself that much when you are so removed from the problem. But now? Being here and feeling the earth, tasting the wind, all its pains and agonies… How does one- How do I lead a people that I once twisted and misguided and used with all cruel intentions, to a brighter future? I abandoned them Aella, just as I abandoned this world.” he looked at her with a pained expression, “I placed so much burden upon you and I’m afraid I’ll need to do it again, just for a little while longer. Where do we even begin?” he seemed to ask himself, looking back down, eyebrows furrowed in thought.
”I know where you must begin, and that is with the people you have abandoned. I don’t know how to begin however, only that you must be open and honest. In their eyes there will likely be nothing you can say or do to make up for what you’ve done but redemption is not what we seek, we just want to set things right.” Aella said, and after a moment continued, ”I may be able to help you smooth things over, but I’d like you to be there to tend my wounds and prevent my death if they become violent, as I am not as powerful as I once was.”
He looked at her, and seemed to notice for the first time what her words said. With another sorrowful look he said, "Perhaps before any of that, it would be better if you and I had a long talk. I would like to know what has occurred as I've been away. I need to know, Aella." He finished with soft spoken words.
Aella sighed, ”With my children gone, I have a surplus of time if nothing else. Come.” She grabbed Larwen by the hand and led him to a dryer part of the beach to sit at. After they got settled and had sorted out a campfire, which Aella needed in order to keep herself warm after slipping out of her damaged jumpsuit, she started to recount all the things that had happened to her after Larwen left all those years ago. ”So… After you left and I collapsed our grove, I met with...”
