[OOC] Star Trader

[Thinslayer]

@ineffable
On January 1st, year 3000, the Crescent Alliance declared its independence from the Terran Empire. Four years later, the Alliance won the war, drafted a constitution, and formed into the Crescent Empire. In the decades after, tensions cooled enough for international business to become feasible. As our students learn the tricks of the trade and enter the world of merchants, they will come to find that their clients across the aether are in much worse shape than they ever realized. Can these up-and-coming citizens of the Empire heal the war wounds between nations inflicted by their parents? Or will the allure of the dollar cast a shadow over their young hearts?
_

This is the OOC thread for Star Traders. While this thread is primarily for ineffable and me to plot out the story, visitors may post comments about the RP here too if they like. Stories of heroism that don't involve killing someone are rare and new territory for me, so feedback is appreciated.

@ineffable, don't forget to Subscribe to the thread like I almost did. :P

[ineffable]

WOOP WOOP!
I'm here! I'll add in my character and start writing ASAP.
Thanks for creating the thread! :)

[Thinslayer]

Had to make a few judicious edits.
* I almost didn't realize that the boy was named Bergson Somerset. I initially called him Justin.
* My description of Sophie was added to make the text flow better.

[Thinslayer]

I decided to draw on my own experiences when articulating Ed's reaction to sitting next to Sophie. The male brain thinks weird, creepy things for a few seconds before reason takes over. Training and good character is what prevents those first thoughts from taking over and letting him act on them. I have a feeling Ed and Bergson will be butting heads later on, since Ed is a good deal more restrained in his dealings with other people.

[ineffable]

Oh hi! I'm so sorry for the short response I had to your long one. It would be a lot of thinking on Sofie's side and I didn't really want to do a whole chapter of that.
And Bergson was just a suggestion of his name, I didn't even know how I thought of it in the first place. Do change it to Justin if you'd like!
Ed seems very diplomatic and I think that'll be one of the things that draws Sofie to him. She's a mysterious character as of now but I do have a faint idea of her past and hopefully that should be revealed every so often.

[Thinslayer]

*waves his hands frantically* Please don't feel bad for differences in post length! Seriously! I'm just having a really good day is all. On good days, I can write a veritable book, but on others, I can barely manage a few lines. It's okay, really.

I find the mystery of her character intriguing. Getting her to open up feels like a puzzle, and Ed will have to tread carefully to avoid hitting the same pitfalls plaguing Somerset. Currently, I have her pegged for a shy girl who has had some unpleasant experiences with men. And I doubt this is the average cliche-shy, where she avoids everyone except the main love interest, who she magically opens up to - this seems like the more realistic kind, where, given an opportunity to escape, she would rather be rid of both guys and be done with the whole ordeal.

I like her.

[ineffable]

AHHHH IM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE HER!

I've written several dark characters before but I think she's truly made of something different than the others. There's something in Sofie that I would love to explore more and I'm happy it's through this role play.

I honestly have written so many pure, good characters that I think it's a bit more interesting to write about a character who may or may not change into the heroic person we want them to be. I like seeing growth in my characters and I think Victor and Sofie could very well explore that a lot in the RP!

[Thinslayer]

Then I shall do my best to help you practice and grow as a roleplayer. I'm kind of going in the opposite direction you are - most of my experience is with characters who have dark pasts, and I'm trying to convert to brighter characters.

What do you say we trade info on how to play such characters?

[ineffable]

That would be wonderful! I find that during this time period I’m writing so many of those dark to good characters and would love the advice.

Also I just picked up on it DID YOU JUST REFER TO YOURSELF IN THIRD PRRSON IN THE POST BEFORE?

And lastly, your IC post was really good. I laughed a lot, imagining Ed as some sort of anime fanboy.

EDIT: OH MY GOD I FOUND OUT WHERE I GOT BERGSON FROM. It’s the last name of the artist Ed was listening to on the way to the university. And I thought I was original

[Thinslayer]

Ah, thank you! I'm glad you liked it. That makes me happy. <3

EDIT: Reworking my advice on the subject. :P
I located a couple articles on the subject.

Tragic backstories are awesome. Cliched, perhaps, but there's a reason they're so popular. Listing to how a character overcame challenges in their lives can be really inspiring, and they offer fertile material for growth and characterization. There are a few questions to consider when writing a tragic backstory.

1. Why? What function does the tragic backstory serve for the plot? For characters like Batman, its primary purpose is to explain why the hero became a hero. For other characters, it serves as a hook for character development, like with Mei in the anime Say I Love You. Her tragic backstory involving friends betraying her gave significance to the otherwise ordinary experience of making new friends. Avoid using it as an excuse for the character, unless the point is for them to overcome that.

2. How bad? While it can be sadistic fun to inflict as much pain on your character as possible, overdoing it can be unhealthy for both you and the character. I made that mistake with Gwen Valentine, and my sister has been mocking me for it ever since. Only inflict enough pain to get the results you need. If you're making a villain, sure, pile on the hurt, but if you're making a hero, prepare to write a really messed-up character, because severe tragedy can have a profound effect on people. I'm not knocking that; messed-up people can be fun to write.

3. Believable? In our story, the people in the Crescent Empire generally live free, happy, healthy lives, while the people in the Terran Empire generally live oppressed, sad, and difficult lives. No place is utopian, but it would be harder to believe that a Crescent-born citizen had a crazy tragic backstory than a Terran-born citizen.

[ineffable]

Ah thank you so much Thin! That was really helpful!
Now for me to give advice back...hmmm. I'm no way as experienced a writer as you are so I'm afraid my advice might have been something you've figured out but I'll give it a go anyway!

I'll be talking about quite weak minded characters if I'm honest, so that may not apply to Ed. I hope it helps anyway.

Good, pure characters are actually quite easy to write (If you grew up on a diet of them anyway)! They come in all shapes and forms, and varied histories are usually fine with them. I mean, good, pure characters never really do have to have a happy history anyway. A happy life doesn't have to mean that the character would become a good person. Sometimes you find that even the happiest of people are struggling with the darkest of thoughts.

However, when writing these characters you have to have it in mind that they can and will have to be corruptible. They love more than others, they are more innocent and they believe that whatever they do should have an impact on the world around them. They are naive, is what I'm trying to get at. They yearn to have an impact on the world around them and would do just about anything to have it be that way.

ERRRRR THAT'S ALL I HAVE FOR NOW BUT I'LL UPDATE IT AND EVERyTHING :)

[Thinslayer]

Ed's theory works like this: if he just forgives her and asks nothing of her, she'll feel like she owes him. A girl of her caliber would probably see that as a trap, since a person with ill will could do her a favor and expect to call in a favor from her that she wouldn't like very much. In order to avoid that trap, he needs to ask something from her to atone. Since he wants to spend time with her and get to know her, he can kill to birds with one stone by having her help him clean.

We'll say she finds another rag or something. They can share the spray bottle. :3

[ineffable]

Gotcha! I'm working on my entry right now!

[Thinslayer]

Just thought of a way Sophie could return Ed's favor - drive off a predatory girl who's taken a fancy to him, just like how Ed drove off a predatory guy who took a fancy to her.

But we gotta get to the Star Trader meat soon. That's where things amp up. >:)

[ineffable]

Ah okay! and yeah, I'm interested in speeding this up a bit.
It's also Sofie with a fie not a phie!

[Thinslayer]

Sofie didn't emit enough deception signals for Ed to recognize the lie. He did catch on from the gaze-aversion that she didn't completely believe her own statement, but he figured it for excessive modesty.

I can't be god-moding, after all, or the mind-games wouldn't be fun. >:)

Also, I declined to put a response hook on my post to give Sofie an opportunity to take initiative.

[ineffable]

Uh huh! Also...why is the incident with the knife such a large deal for Ed? I mean she thought it was an intruder and everything, still it seems like Ed is being so much more wary now.

And, I'm not sure where the response hook is because of my extreme sleepiness but I'll try to put something in.

EDIT: So it's done! I was going to end once the dialogue did but I didn't so we get a kind of weird ending.
I was also, please forgive me for this idea, thinking of some kind of love triangle? Moglet's an interesting character and I think I might put him in for future appearances.

[Thinslayer]

The Crescents established a strong system of law and order very quickly after the Revolution ended, so the nation Ed grew up with was a peaceful, law-abiding one. While most people have an armament of some sort, actually using it is an extremely rare event. He's trained in basic marksmanship, but being attacked with a knife is an utterly new experience for him, and he won't soon forget it. He knows no self-defense techniques, has no experience de-escalating deadly fights, and to top it off, he barely knows this girl and has no clue what she's capable of. He genuinely thought he was going to die. If he had been next to that door, he would have been stabbed for sure.

Her lack of restraint is the reason he doesn't trust her very much. The thought that he could get stabbed on accident just by being in unexpected places at unexpected times frightens him. Technically, he should have gone to the authorities, who could have arranged for Sofie to get professional help as well as ensure his safety, but...well, she's attractive, and he doesn't exactly want her to leave. Male hormones are definitely playing a part in his decision-making. :P

Plus, he's still curious about her, and like he said, he's prepared to give romance another shot with her. He just has to be more wary from now on until he can work out a way to make her feel safe (and thus not feel the need to barge into rooms with a knife).

Making his lady feel secure is one of the foremost duties of a man, no? ;)

[Thinslayer]

Seriously, don't sweat the knife incident so much. I know how you feel - you're probably feeling like Sofie ruined the romance, or Ed overreacted, and you're trying to regain your footing. Really, there's no need to worry. I liked the knife scene! It peeled back the curtain a little on her background, while at the same time introducing more questions than it answers. What kind of life did she lead that could have made her that wary? Plus, having a frightened lady to protect offers Ed an excellent opportunity to win her heart. If he can show that she doesn't have to be afraid when she's around him, he's already halfway there.

I don't write my posts to make people regret the content they made. If there's a problem with a scene, we have the OOC thread for that. I'm here to make a story. Be true to your character, and don't look back except to make it your stepping stone on the way forward. When I write, I trust in that, in your characters staying true to who they are. I ask only that you trust me a little in return.

[ineffable]

Oh, I see. I was just a bit confused, but it's not to worry! I wasn't concerned with the knife incident much though thank you for explaining out Ed's side of the story more and making that awesome inspirational speech/essay thing. It helps!

Also...what do you think of Moglet?
And I've also left the stone throwing at the window for you to determine. It could literally be anyone so I've opened up the idea for you to take wherever.

Do you want to do a time skip after a couple of posts to when the classes actually start?