Belly Button
Me (looking cute) and my MACHINE GUN! It doesn't work yet but it will! Don't tell anyone that it doesn't work, or else I'll shoot you with it when it's fixed.
¤ Age, approximately.
NINETEEN! I'm Nineteen. I counted. I remember the very m-m-moment I was born, y'know! I was there th-the whole time! I can say, without a doubt, one HUNDO percent, that I am Nineteen, Three Months, and TWO DAYS...young.
¤ What Are You?
The Oilburner.
Someone who needs heat, and casts away shadows with light and flame alike. Always trying to "burn the midnight oil" as much as possible.
¤ What defines you?
Sharp. With a capital S.
¤ Who are you?
Hmm...well...I don't even know where to start! At the beginning, I guess. Nineteen years, three months, and two days ago, I was squirted from a vagina. You probably already guess that, that's true for everybody. Unless you got cut out? Anyway my mom's name was Braid and my dad's name was Who-Gives-A-Fuck, I dunno, he wasn't there.
I was actually born in Steelbird Landing, wouldn't you believe it? Back in the bad old days! Braid, my momma, she was a good lady. Real pretty, if you ask me, and smart as a c-c-cookie. The only thing I don't like about her is that she named me Belly Button. I wish she woulda named me Ponytail or Bun, or...Piercing. Something. Belly Button...I guess she thought it was cute? She was that kind of lady, my momma. She wanted me to be smart, she did! I am. Lucky I was BORN smart, pretty sure. Most people in this world are just born dumb idiots, but me, I was born smart, real smart. A f-f-fucking genius. But I still had to learn, just like everyone else!
Now my momma she had it bad. While I was born in S-s-steelbird Landing, she wasn't. My dad, Who-Gives-A-Fuck, (momma never told me his name) was a bad man. A real bad man. Let's j-j-just say that little old Belly Button wasn't a mistake, but she sure as shit wasn't intentional, either. Least not on Momma's part. But she loved me anyway because Momma Braid was the best woman to ever live. Now Gives-A was the leader of a bunch of pricks up north. Holed up in a couple of old city blocks. Anyway they hated everyone and everything. E-e-even each other! And the leader thought he owned everyone. Everyone believed him. S-s-so I guess that means he really d-d-did own everyone? Anyway my momma decided to run away from his DUMB ASS and she took books from the library with her, and she took me with her, too, and I was inside her because I was just a gross little fetus lookin' thing at the time. (I know, because I remember!)
Well he hated that. But fuck him, he's probably dead by now. She ran ran ran, with a few others, and most of 'em made it to Steelbird Landing. And my momma decided I was gonna be the SMARTEST boy that ever l-l-lived! But I was a girl, but she said that's okay, because, again, best person ever.
Aaanyway, so I grew up here! And I read those books every day, e-e-even if I didn't understand them. Momma taught me the few words that she knew. She found picture books for me, alphabet books. And I loved loved loved it, almost as m-m-much as I loved her.
My childhood was lots of books. I r-ran off by myself to scavenge more books. I traded for them, did tasks and favors. Y-you'd be surprised how many people still have books! They just use them as doorstoppers and table-evener-outers and plates or toilet paper.
M-m-my favorite was ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS engineering! Science fiction inspired me! Old pictures of beauty beautiful things that we forgot how to build. Steelbird itself is built on the remnants of an airplane! People u-u-used to get in 'em and, and, like, fly all over the world! Like birds! Once I figured stuff like that out, there was no stopping me. I wanted to be just like those people. I wanted to make great things! So I did! I DID make great things! I'm REALLY REALLY GOOD AT IT! Engineering and CHEMISTRY and MATH and LITERATURE! There's SO MUCH! INFINITE KNOWLEDGE! My appetite for discovery has never been not whet. My momma gave me a book about a caterpillar who ate and ate and ate, until it became a beautiful butterfly and flew away.
That's gonna be me someday.
A-a-anyway, where was I? Oh yeah! I started making toys! Simple ones, out of wood. Then I added m-moving parts that the other kids could move with their hands. My goal was to make things that if you pushed a button something happened, and I d-did that, too. Because, y'see, I'm really smart. And I learned to be smarter.
SOME kids thought they could take advantage of me and take and steal the toys but I set them straight by setting their hair on fire. NO ONE messes with Ms. Button.
That's when I discovered I'm, uh, a bit of a fire bug. It's not that big of a deal, really, nowadays I g-get it out of my system when I'm welding or heating metal. B-but sometimes I need to find a nice secluded spot and j-j-just raze something. Just an itchy itchy itch in the back of my head, I guess, sometimes. I've always liked blowing things up almost as much as I liked making other things. N-now making things to blow up other things up? W-well, THAT IS THE DREAM, IS IT NOT?
Wasn't all fire and brimstone! I looove chemistry. Very necessary for blowing things up. Not quite as good at it, YET. I made a water purifier! It was really shitty and it broke but I'm making another one. I also make bear traps and regular traps and, I guess, uh, infrastructure! I love making things. This post-apocalyptic world makes for g-g-GREAT challenge. Y'know? So many things to learn and do and see- it- it it- it's all too much! I can BARELY CONTAIN MYSELF! Sometimes I just wanna--- EXPLODE! But I can't do that, so instead I blow up other things! Sometimes. Like I said, it's not a big deal, really.
Naturally, as all great women of science do, I wish to SHARE my knowledge with the rest of the civilized world! Unfortunately most people in this backwater town are too dumb. But but but that's okay. My momma helps organize things. I would LOVE LOVE for there to be a library in Steelbird Landing! Best d-day of my life, that would be. I'm working it! Plus, that means everyone would give me their books for FREE! As long as I got to put them back. And I would put my books there, too! And if anyone tried to steal from it- I would just set them on fire!
And I FARM! I try too, anyway- I got help from some of the local subsistence farmers! I made little pulley systems that increase the farming, so you just pull one thing and all of it gets watered. And rainwater collectors! Potatoes! I love potatoes. Potatoes are the best thing in the world, second only to books, second only to Momma. You can use them to eat! And you can use them to make ALCOHOL! And alcohol can be used to set things on fire. And also trade! And also BATTERIES!?!? God isn't real but potatoes are evidence that he really really is!
...I hate the jungle. And all those monsters. Those freaks and savages in the woods like my biological father. And those people who believe in fake gods. Makes me sick sick sick to my stomach. Everything would have been FINE if nobody went crazy. But no! The disasters weren't enough. One day they're all gonna be dead and gone and only the sm-SMART people like ME will still be alive!
I have followers! Friends! They like me! I'm trying to teach people how to r-r-read. Improving literacy rates is vital for the growth of any society! I'd love to get it at at least 10%! The more people who knows how to read, the more people can teach other people how to r-r-read! It's like a disease! But a good one. The vaccination for literacy would be brain trauma, I guess. And I'd be a super spreader! Watch out, I'm contagious! Haha! Wait, no, maybe that's not the best metaphor. Did you know cholera spreads from dirty water?
But yeah anyway, I think people like me. Well, they haven't tried to kill me in a while, anyway. I'm a regular en-en-entrepreneur! I mean I wanna work on cars and everything but..there's too much! Right now I'm focusing on literacy rates! The Steelbird Public Library will take over the world! All the little kiddies will be even smarter than me. Well, maybe not, but st-st-still.
Anyway yeah that's me. You asked who I am and you got me!
By the way...you can just call me Bell, or Button, or Ms. Button. It's- it's fine, r-really.
Hmm...well...I don't even know where to start! At the beginning, I guess. Nineteen years, three months, and two days ago, I was squirted from a vagina. You probably already guess that, that's true for everybody. Unless you got cut out? Anyway my mom's name was Braid and my dad's name was Who-Gives-A-Fuck, I dunno, he wasn't there.
I was actually born in Steelbird Landing, wouldn't you believe it? Back in the bad old days! Braid, my momma, she was a good lady. Real pretty, if you ask me, and smart as a c-c-cookie. The only thing I don't like about her is that she named me Belly Button. I wish she woulda named me Ponytail or Bun, or...Piercing. Something. Belly Button...I guess she thought it was cute? She was that kind of lady, my momma. She wanted me to be smart, she did! I am. Lucky I was BORN smart, pretty sure. Most people in this world are just born dumb idiots, but me, I was born smart, real smart. A f-f-fucking genius. But I still had to learn, just like everyone else!
Now my momma she had it bad. While I was born in S-s-steelbird Landing, she wasn't. My dad, Who-Gives-A-Fuck, (momma never told me his name) was a bad man. A real bad man. Let's j-j-just say that little old Belly Button wasn't a mistake, but she sure as shit wasn't intentional, either. Least not on Momma's part. But she loved me anyway because Momma Braid was the best woman to ever live. Now Gives-A was the leader of a bunch of pricks up north. Holed up in a couple of old city blocks. Anyway they hated everyone and everything. E-e-even each other! And the leader thought he owned everyone. Everyone believed him. S-s-so I guess that means he really d-d-did own everyone? Anyway my momma decided to run away from his DUMB ASS and she took books from the library with her, and she took me with her, too, and I was inside her because I was just a gross little fetus lookin' thing at the time. (I know, because I remember!)
Well he hated that. But fuck him, he's probably dead by now. She ran ran ran, with a few others, and most of 'em made it to Steelbird Landing. And my momma decided I was gonna be the SMARTEST boy that ever l-l-lived! But I was a girl, but she said that's okay, because, again, best person ever.
Aaanyway, so I grew up here! And I read those books every day, e-e-even if I didn't understand them. Momma taught me the few words that she knew. She found picture books for me, alphabet books. And I loved loved loved it, almost as m-m-much as I loved her.
My childhood was lots of books. I r-ran off by myself to scavenge more books. I traded for them, did tasks and favors. Y-you'd be surprised how many people still have books! They just use them as doorstoppers and table-evener-outers and plates or toilet paper.
M-m-my favorite was ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS engineering! Science fiction inspired me! Old pictures of beauty beautiful things that we forgot how to build. Steelbird itself is built on the remnants of an airplane! People u-u-used to get in 'em and, and, like, fly all over the world! Like birds! Once I figured stuff like that out, there was no stopping me. I wanted to be just like those people. I wanted to make great things! So I did! I DID make great things! I'm REALLY REALLY GOOD AT IT! Engineering and CHEMISTRY and MATH and LITERATURE! There's SO MUCH! INFINITE KNOWLEDGE! My appetite for discovery has never been not whet. My momma gave me a book about a caterpillar who ate and ate and ate, until it became a beautiful butterfly and flew away.
That's gonna be me someday.
A-a-anyway, where was I? Oh yeah! I started making toys! Simple ones, out of wood. Then I added m-moving parts that the other kids could move with their hands. My goal was to make things that if you pushed a button something happened, and I d-did that, too. Because, y'see, I'm really smart. And I learned to be smarter.
SOME kids thought they could take advantage of me and take and steal the toys but I set them straight by setting their hair on fire. NO ONE messes with Ms. Button.
That's when I discovered I'm, uh, a bit of a fire bug. It's not that big of a deal, really, nowadays I g-get it out of my system when I'm welding or heating metal. B-but sometimes I need to find a nice secluded spot and j-j-just raze something. Just an itchy itchy itch in the back of my head, I guess, sometimes. I've always liked blowing things up almost as much as I liked making other things. N-now making things to blow up other things up? W-well, THAT IS THE DREAM, IS IT NOT?
Wasn't all fire and brimstone! I looove chemistry. Very necessary for blowing things up. Not quite as good at it, YET. I made a water purifier! It was really shitty and it broke but I'm making another one. I also make bear traps and regular traps and, I guess, uh, infrastructure! I love making things. This post-apocalyptic world makes for g-g-GREAT challenge. Y'know? So many things to learn and do and see- it- it it- it's all too much! I can BARELY CONTAIN MYSELF! Sometimes I just wanna--- EXPLODE! But I can't do that, so instead I blow up other things! Sometimes. Like I said, it's not a big deal, really.
Naturally, as all great women of science do, I wish to SHARE my knowledge with the rest of the civilized world! Unfortunately most people in this backwater town are too dumb. But but but that's okay. My momma helps organize things. I would LOVE LOVE for there to be a library in Steelbird Landing! Best d-day of my life, that would be. I'm working it! Plus, that means everyone would give me their books for FREE! As long as I got to put them back. And I would put my books there, too! And if anyone tried to steal from it- I would just set them on fire!
And I FARM! I try too, anyway- I got help from some of the local subsistence farmers! I made little pulley systems that increase the farming, so you just pull one thing and all of it gets watered. And rainwater collectors! Potatoes! I love potatoes. Potatoes are the best thing in the world, second only to books, second only to Momma. You can use them to eat! And you can use them to make ALCOHOL! And alcohol can be used to set things on fire. And also trade! And also BATTERIES!?!? God isn't real but potatoes are evidence that he really really is!
...I hate the jungle. And all those monsters. Those freaks and savages in the woods like my biological father. And those people who believe in fake gods. Makes me sick sick sick to my stomach. Everything would have been FINE if nobody went crazy. But no! The disasters weren't enough. One day they're all gonna be dead and gone and only the sm-SMART people like ME will still be alive!
I have followers! Friends! They like me! I'm trying to teach people how to r-r-read. Improving literacy rates is vital for the growth of any society! I'd love to get it at at least 10%! The more people who knows how to read, the more people can teach other people how to r-r-read! It's like a disease! But a good one. The vaccination for literacy would be brain trauma, I guess. And I'd be a super spreader! Watch out, I'm contagious! Haha! Wait, no, maybe that's not the best metaphor. Did you know cholera spreads from dirty water?
But yeah anyway, I think people like me. Well, they haven't tried to kill me in a while, anyway. I'm a regular en-en-entrepreneur! I mean I wanna work on cars and everything but..there's too much! Right now I'm focusing on literacy rates! The Steelbird Public Library will take over the world! All the little kiddies will be even smarter than me. Well, maybe not, but st-st-still.
Anyway yeah that's me. You asked who I am and you got me!
By the way...you can just call me Bell, or Button, or Ms. Button. It's- it's fine, r-really.
¤ What do you want?
Some day...some day I wanna burn that whole damn jungle to the ground.
After that, I wanna build a car.
Then...? I wanna make a new Steelbird. An airplane! I wanna make a new Steelbird and fly, fly, fly away, far from here. Then I'll return with treasures and knowledge! There's gotta be someplace out there for people like me. I've seen pictures of places where there IS no jungle. They can h-h-help us.
¤ What do you believe?
Truth. Truth truth truth. I think the truth is that we had something really good going and then we all screwed it up. Nature threw a little temper tantrum and all the weak-minded l-l-LUNATICS took the opportunity to go on murderous rampages. Steelbird Landing, and places like it, are the ONLY hope! Every where else is full of BRAIN DEAD MORONS! One day things will get back to how they used to be. I'm probably not gonna live to see it, though, but SOMEONE will, and they're gonna look at a big statue of me and say "Gee thanks, Belly Button, you really had something good going on."
¤ What do you follow?
If you're anywhere near as smart as I am, you probably g-guessed it. That's right! My kneecaps. No HAHA, no, it's my NOODLE, of course! My brain, my mind, that wonderful p-p-pile of electrified grey matter rattling around in my noggin! It's NEVER lead me astray. It IS me, actually. I'm my brain! What else would I follow, if not me my brain?
¤ A scarcity embodied:
(Time. Button has so much she wants to do and not enough time to do it. She was born in the wrong time. She yearns for a time that has past. To her, everything moves so agonizingly slow.)
¤ Basic Instincts:
I always have goggles and a mask. If not on my face, then on standby! Never know when a bunch of small particles are gonna fly in your face.
I always return to my garage.
...And I've got a lighter or a flint and tinder or a matchbox or a tinderbox on me. Just a little something to start a little fire.
¤ Spill Your Guts
¤ What do you most regret doing?
One time one of my fires got out of control. Someone had built a homestead on the outskirts- I didn't see it there b-b-because I was so excited, I really had the itch that time. I don't think there was anyone inside. At least I hope there wasn't. I didn't check. =
¤ Who do you owe?
I owe my Momma everything.
¤ What/Who are you addicted to? What are you willing to do to acquire it?
I'm addicted to...knowledge. Books. Stories. Scrap. I NEED a project to work on. I need to be DOING something, otherwise why am I even alive!?
¤ Who's intentions do you question?
There's a w-woman named Vineleaf that comes around to my garage. She says she only wants to learn how to read but she looks at my gadgets and my toys and my engines. And she looks at me when she thinks I'm not looking. I don't know what she r-r-really wants from me, but sh-she really creeps me out.
¤ Who wants you all to themselves?
People in faraway places. Who-Gives-A-Fuck, probably. They hear about my hands and my brain and they want to get at me but I'm a solo operator! I'm a WOMAN OF THE PEOPLE! NO GODS NO KINGS!
Hear the Whispers...
S-s-sometimes, when one of my fires goes REALLY, REALLY HOT, and it's really really dark, and I'm really really all alone, I feel like it talks to me. I know it's not real. I know it's just that nasty nasty nasty l-light, up over my head. But it tells me to keep burning. It feels like I go on fire, too, and it feels good. I feel like I can turn into the King Midas of the inferno, and everything I touch melts away in my hand. I'll drown in the ashes. When it's over, there will only be cinders and peace. A Great Phoenix will rise and rule and soar and look upon my finest work and respect me. The Great Phoenix- that's what the fire says to me sometimes.
It's scary. I don't want the Phoenix to come h-h-here. Only SOME things need to be destroyed. Other things need to be BUILT. And I get to choose. Only me. Only Button.
So I usually bring a book to read while I'm setting fires. Just in case I need to get my mind off things.
OWN WHAT YOU'VE BECOME
The Oilburner? I've seen her in the night, lit by the orange glow of a fire. I hope that little spark doesn't consume us all...
YOUR FATHER RECENTLY GOT INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR WHEREABOUTS. WHO LET IT SLIP?
Pr-probably m-m-m-m-me... I...I haven't been c-c-careful. I knew I shoulda had mom ch-change her name! He's...he's not gonna come here, is he..? Wh-w-whatever! Whatever! I'm not scared of him! He comes here, I'll just set him on fire!
YOU'VE SEEN ONE OF THE MONSTERS IN THE JUNGLE BEFORE. WHAT DID IT LOOK LIKE? WHAT DID IT SAY TO YOU?
I kn-know I shouldn't leave by myself. But, I don't like it when other people w-watch me burn things. So...y'know. I have to go. And the fire usually keeps animals away. Usually. U-usua...
Um...well. It was tall. Must have been nearly 6 meters tall. It looked like it was about to fall over. So it...it had to lean on the trees for support. It was narrow, and...mossy. And wet. And quiet. Way, way, too quiet quiet...quiet. I couldn't see it's face, it was t-too dark up there. The flames...didn't reach. It asked me...why.
But there was no way it really knew what it was asking me. Infact- I-I-I was probably just s-suffering from auditory pareidolia! Or m-maybe it's just a habit, from the...human it used to be. I screamed and ran away, and I thought it was gonna strangle me to death with it's super creepy long fingers.
It's not...mad at me, is it? For burning down the jungle? No way. No way. Just a monster. Just wanted to eat me or kill me or...turn me into one of it. I dunno! Just one more reason to INCINERATE THAT PLACE!
YOU HAVE SUSPICIONS THAT ONE OF YOUR "STUDY FRIENDS" HAS ULTERIOR MOTIVES... WHO WAS IT, AND WHAT DID YOU SEE THEM DO?
Vineleaf. Vineleaf, Vineleaf, Vineleaf. Look, I'll say it- she's hot, okay? And m-maybe some part of my h-hormone addled brain is just making things up, so I think I have her attention. But I know what I know, and I think what I think. And that lady is...I dunno! She's weird! She looks at me! I catch her in the mirror looking at me when she thinks I'm n-not looking. And she's so...touchy. I have to stop her from g-going into the back rooms.
O-okay, look, I'm not crazy. I swear she pick-pocketed me. Reached right into my o-overall back pocket and t-took my protractor! I think one time I caught her tr-trying to sn-sneak out with my calculator! I can't be sure, though.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "Belly Button...why don't you just set her on fire? Or ban her from your shop?"
W-well, arson is illegal in Steelbird Landing. And for good reason, don't get me wrong. And well...somehow, she always talks me out of it. Always apologises, always seems so genuine. Maybe she's just dumb? And other p-people seem to like her. I dunno. I dunno what her deal is. I wish she would just leave me alone.
Plus plus plus...well... my mom knows her dad. And her dad, Orchard, helped my mom escape. So even if Vineleaf is a weirdo or a dumbass, I f-feel like I...owe her something? She was just a baby when her dad made the run Steelbird Landing. But in a way, I guess we did it together. I dunno.
SOMEONE HAS OFFERED YOU A LOT OF JINGLE FOR A SPECIAL PROJECT. WHO WAS IT, AND WHY DID YOU TURN THEM DOWN?
Probably gotta be Spider. Sh-she asked me to make a smoke bomb. Spider is kinda creepy. So I said: why do you need a smoke bomb? And she says, to put out fires. Then she asked me if I know much about chemicals. And I said yes. And then SHE said if I know anything about p-putting people to sleep with the chemicals. And I asked her wh-why, and she said it's because she has insomnia. Then she just gives me this big price. Like woah, lady, I ain't even said yes yet. I turned her down, said I was busy. Told her to go see Salamander for her insomnia, if she cares about it so much.
Look...I'm not stupid, right? Smoke bomb? Sleeping stuff? That's biological warfare. You can combine those two things reaaalll easy. Sleeping bomb? Who makes that? Who needs that? Regular bombs, sure. Sleeping bombs? I dunno. Seems suspicious.
SOMEONE TAKES ISSUE WITH YOU AND ALL YOUR INVENTIONS. WHO IS IT, AND WHAT HAVE THEY DONE ABOUT IT SO FAR?
Jerry Fuckin' Can. I hate that guy. Fat bastard. Stupid Jerry. God damn Luddite. Religious sonova bitch. Says that technology was the reason the world went to shit in the first place. Says I'm makin' the same mistakes. Says I'm gonna burn the world to cinders! Fuck you, Can. I'm gonna burn your house down. He threatens me! With his eyes! He doesn't say anything outloud, only to me, when he's alone with me during low hours or when I'm workin. I swear he broke some of my wooden windows. And maybe HE'S THE ONE that tried to steal my calculator!? Or my abbacus!? I dunno! I dunno dunno dunno! I wish he would just go away. And he says I'm an arsonist. Well, SO WHAT IF I AM!? AND HE CAN'T PROVE NOTHIN'!
L-look. I get it. I'm...not like a lot of other people! I j-just wish someone would try and do their thing, instead of being all sn-SNEAKY about it! Just make your move! Vineleaf and Spider and Jerry Can are always snoopin' and sneaking and lying to me and everyone and I just- I just HATE IT! I'm not good with people, okay!? Why do people gotta take advantage of that!? Jesus! I'm not hurtin' nobody!
¤Your theme song goes here, if you are so inclined.
