Having a rough time :/

[karmacrushh]

Hey everyone, sorry about the constant posting, I'm getting into the swing of things.

Long story short, I'm really getting discouraged with rping now. I used to absolutely LOVE it, it was and honestly still is one of my favorite hobbies. But the thing is, it's been dead for me lately. I had to take a break and now that I'm trying to get back into it, I can't find anyone to write with. I have some really specific cravings (which I know doesn't help), but not a single one of them is filled. I'll tell someone my OC, and they won't reply to me. I'll message people, and they'll ignore me. Like if I'm THAT terrible for whatever reason, I wish someone would just tell me instead of ignoring me. The climate of rping has really changed in my opinion and the fact that I can't find anyone with similar interests is honestly starting to make me consider quitting.

I'm starting to consider just listing all my OCs with all their information, plus any plot ideas I have just to save myself the time of explaining it only to have someone ignore me after. It sucks because I'm dying for these cravings but everyone has been such a jackass to me about it, like I've been dealing with horribly rude people lately. And, any time I do get a response, it's for one of the fandoms I really don't want that badly :/ I've been searching for what is basically months, posting everywhere, and I can't get a single bite.

Have any of you been in that situation before? And if so, can you offer any advice?

[ArenaSnow]

I'm honestly pretty open (my main problem is scratching up some of that rare and easily lost stuff called Time) to various RP types, so I can't really say as to the cravings part. I have had some dead times, and those times I just try to wrap myself into something else and get back a little fresher.

Just curious; what are your interests in RP types?

[karmacrushh]

@ArenaSnow I totally feel you on the time thing, I'm a biomedical sciences major on the premed track. It's precious haha.

I'm open to various types of rps usually, but my main interest right now is fandoms, Watchmen, Kingsman: The Secret Service, and Howls Moving Castle specifically. What I would like, ideally, is to have my cravings filled, and then I'll be open to whatever. But it's having these nagging cravings going unfilled that's just sapping my muse for everything else. So while I would usually love to try a whole bunch of things, my muse is pretty much all stopped up in my cravings.

I think the most discouraging part is definitely how rude people have become, so it's kind of adding insult to injury. Like it's bad enough that everything I'm dying to write is going completely ignored, but to have the few people I might have a chance of writing them with be really rude to be and ignore me is just making it worse.

[ArenaSnow]

I vaguely recall Kingsman, but never got into it very much. I recall a nice feeling after I saw (a movie, I think) by the name, so it can't be all bad :)

Fandoms I don't do all that great with, although you may be in luck if they include the Diablo universe, Battletech, and/or Supernatural...

[karmacrushh]

It was a fun movie :) Goofy as all hell. And the weirdest part to me is that I've seen my cravings requested before by others. So I'm just sitting here like, "Well I gotta have cooties or something" lol.

Unfortunately I don't do those :/ I've never played Diablo haha

[Engel]

Yup, been in a similar situation the last months too. I haven't been able to find anything meaningful or lasting than the one I already had since several months back, even though I want to do other settings or plots too. I've considered quitting as well, cause I barely know why I RP anymore most of the time. It's not the first time it's happened to me though, and I used to take breaks when it got bad, do something else, but it never felt this meaningless before. Too many bad partners I guess.

I think longer breaks help with regaining energy and trying again. It might be a good idea to list OCs and plot ideas, you wouldn't have to deal with people that aren't interested and it could be easier to find those who are. I used to list settings or fandoms that I didn't want all that much too, but eventually removed them just so I wouldn't get someone asking me about them.

[karmacrushh]

@EngelDefinitely, it's so draining when you can't find the reason why you rp anymore, like having a good partner or the plotline you've ben craving. Part of my problem is that I'm trying to come out of my break and find rps to get back into. For a while I almost did, but it's been two weeks since anyone replied to me. It just sucks that people have gotten so rude about it, lately.

I'll write up character sheets and plot ideas! I think it'll be good too because then the people who are so wary of OCs (literally I've had people want to screen my OCs beforehand so they can judge "if they'll fit the universe") may have their minds changed. Listing fandoms I'm less interested in has definitely come back to bite me in the ass. Everyone wants my secondary interests at that point but not my primary.

[AtlasRedfox]

Just wanted to say I Know how you feel.... I've come back to RP from a massive break (6+ years). Fortunantly I've found a few RP's that have peaked my interest but they are not what I had a craving for. But I do know what you mean about rude people! It's frustrating for sure, I've had tons on enthusiasm few a few RP's that have been started only to have no replies or people so rude I want to high-5 their face.

[karmacrushh]

@AtlasRedfox thank you, I think what's been bumming me out mostly too is that I see so many people finding their cravings and I'm just sitting here like, "lol someone love me please". I mean, it sucks that we're having a hard time, but at least it's not seeming like I'm the only one anymore.

Seriously, either a high five to the face or a cup check or something Dx Honestly, it's bad enough not finding what I would truly love, I don't need jerks on top of it.

[FantasyChic]

Yeah I've been in your shoes. It sucks but that's life sometimes. Before I RPd on websites and such I was way into RP on MMOs. I would join RP Guilds and go on their sites and all that. For a while it had been fun, but the RP community quickly became such a volatile thing with everyone clamouring about what they want, bitching about how they weren't getting their way, and interest slowly dying as years went on. Most MMOs don't focus on the RP community either so we always got the short end.

I've been the target sometimes too. I've been ridiculed, slandered, even stalked before. So after a while I just gave it up. Took a long break. Finally I decided wanted to come back but j wanted to avoid the online gaming community. Instead I found sites like this and jumped in. Been having a blast, but there's always hiccups.

You aren't alone so take comfort in that. Plus, as weird as this is, I've found comfort here talking about it all to like-minded people.

[Phoenix]

Everyone's interests aren't shared. It's taken me a while to come to that realization. Even when someone's interests are the same, the manner in which they want it implemented is vastly different. I'm not sure if this is a concern for you, but just an example of what I've gone through.

As for the rude people, that's going to happen. It seems like it's more prevalent lately, what with the influx of new RPers or those that haven't RP'd for years on this particular forum (since all forums with RPing are vastly different). Soon after I began RPing, I realized what I wanted and realized that most others couldn't fulfill that for me. So, I went to GMing. And though I'm still learning how to GM effectively, I've found it (generally) more rewarding than just being a player.

I've met RPers and GMs that I have learned to never go near again. There are plenty of times when I've seen a fellow RPer behave rudely and have to bite my tongue. I've had RPers come to me about an RP I wish to start and criticize how it's run and the mechanics. I just explain to them why I've decided what I've decided in a civil manner and expect them to not return, knowing it's not for them.

I've been trying to get a couple RPs to go for years now, trying the same one's over to see if a new (better) crowd is around, but alas. I'm just going to keep trying. The thing with such a large community like this one, you really have to be patient. One of my IntChks to an OOC has 20~ bumps in a row from me, and the OOC is completely untouched. But I understand that the way in which I want the RP to run to fit my desires is not the same as others, and I think that's what we need to take from this.

Currently, I'm in an RP of a genre that I didn't consider going back into, but the GMs seem cool and I liked the plotline, so I joined. I've subsided from bumping my hopeless RP every other day to every week. I guess it's just persistence and patience.

Otherwise, I've just written stuff on my own and started a project that could become a novel if I ever got the self-esteem and confidence that I could do it. I've tried to get into other arts (drawing, singing) but they don't fill the same need. So I guess it'd be best to just keep looking or start something yourself. Be open and expectant of failure ('cause that's what the majority of this forum is). Just because you want it now doesn't mean it will come to you. And just because you've wanted it for months doesn't mean it's going to sit in your lap and give you puppy dog eyes. If you want a specific role-play and you've started an IntChk, don't expect it to get any views. Bump it if you have to.

But I will warn you about the general state of players right now. They're pretty poor, so don't take a CS as a sign of commitment in the slightest. There seems to be no real cure to people disappearing. :/

And I'm sorry if this is depressing or pessimistic, but that's just how it is, sometimes. I wish you the best in your endeavors, though. I hope you find a source of creative entertainment. :)

[karmacrushh]

@PhoenixOh I know that not everyone shares my interests. I mean, thank you, but I really just want one bite. I don't need the most amazing rp ever but all I really want right now is someone with the same interests. Because I've seen my interests requested before. I've seen them filled before for others.

I don't care for GMing because thats not my interest. I don't want to control everything or run a whole forum rp. I've been writing on my own, but that's boring and predictable. I know not to take a message as commitment. It's just disheartening to see no one respond at any time for months on end and it's even worse because I want to see these interactions play out and watch these characters grow, but because of personal hangups no one wants to do it.

Players are shit right now, I'm well aware. That's all I've been dealing with. All I want is some maturity and maybe a bite. That's literally it.

[karmacrushh]

I just find it very hard to believe that out of the half dozen or more ads I have floating around coupled with the amount of activity on all these sites that not one person is interested.

It simply doesn't add up.

[ArenaSnow]

@PhoenixOh I know that not everyone shares my interests. I mean, thank you, but I really just want one bite. I don't need the most amazing rp ever but all I really want right now is someone with the same interests. Because I've seen my interests requested before. I've seen them filled before for others.

I don't care for GMing because thats not my interest. I don't want to control everything or run a whole forum rp. I've been writing on my own, but that's boring and predictable. I know not to take a message as commitment. It's just disheartening to see no one respond at any time for months on end and it's even worse because I want to see these interactions play out and watch these characters grow, but because of personal hangups no one wants to do it.

Players are shit right now, I'm well aware. That's all I've been dealing with. All I want is some maturity and maybe a bite. That's literally it.

@karmacrushh

Yeah, around here... concepts tend to be hit or miss. Even when they hit, some have a nasty tendency to die out early...

That said, if you come up with something that catches my eye, I might drop in myself some time. :)

[Fillet]

I just find it very hard to believe that out of the half dozen or more ads I have floating around coupled with the amount of activity on all these sites that not one person is interested.

It simply doesn't add up.

@karmacrushh

I found what worked for me was instead of passively waiting for people to come to me, and I felt dejected, I went around looking for people who seemed like we'd be a good fit. I PM-ed plenty and most of them were rude (read: they didn't bother to reply or the RP died after the CS start), but finally, I've found three who play to my standards and it's great. It's worth having the patience for the search.

[karmacrushh]

@ArenaSnowI was trying to pinpoint the exact word, concepts is a good way to put it. It seems like conceptual rps are a lot less popular.

Thank you (:

[karmacrushh]

@FilletThat's a good point. I think I've been scared to message people just it's so hard to tell if they'll accept or not, but I'll definitely give that a shot (: Thankfully, I've been getting some messages since I posted here, so maybe my luck is turning around.

[Ellri]

Being active in your acquisition process helps. The majority you contact/ask won't be interested/right, but the few who are makes it worth it.

[Fillet]

Yup they're definitely worth sorting through the junk. I've got three players playing in different standards and genres and they've been extremely patient with me. They don't drop games either. They've restored my faith in humanity. I can't say this for the group rps I've been in or the gazillion 1x1 I tried. Don't give up, good players are precious.

[Frettzo]

If you're having a rough time, find something else to do meanwhile. You're doing this for fun, aren't you? So if it stopped being fun, stop doing it. I find a good alternative to RP is traditional solo writing. What better partner in writing than yourself?